Grimdark Songwriting

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Observing some striking correlations between the songs found in children's movies and the 40K universe, people on /tg/ sometimes adapt these songs to bring out their true grimdark potential.

Contents

Disney Adaptations[edit]

The most popular segment to be subjected to grimdarkification, Disney songs seem to lend themselves well to the total despair of the 41st millennium.

Pocahontas: Savages[edit]

-Part 1-
[Inquisitor Ratcliffe]
What can you expect
From filthy little xenos?
Their whole disgusting race is like a curse
For them no tears we shed
They're only good when dead
They're vermin, as I said
And worse

[Deathwatch Marines]
They're aliens! Aliens!

[Inquisitor Ratcliffe]
They're not even human

[Deathwatch Marines]
Aliens! Aliens!

[Inquisitor Ratcliffe]
Astartes to the fore!
They're not like you and me
Which means that we must purge them
We must sound the drums of war!

[Inquisitor Ratcliffe+Deathwatch Marines]
They're aliens! Aliens!
Filthy xenos rabble!
Now we sound the drums of war!

[Eldrad]
This is as I saw
With their absurd ambition
The Mon-Keigh seek to conquer and destroy

[Caerys]
Beneath that armour plate
They harbor only hate

[Aspect Warriors]
Killing them shall be a joy

[Aspect Warriors]
They're savages! Savages!
Zeal and fervor blinds them
Savages! Savages!

[Caerys]
Killers at the core

[Exarch]
They're a lesser race than us
Which means they can't be trusted

[Eldrad]
We must sound the drums of war

[Aspect Warriors]
They're savages! Savages!
Now we march against them
And we sound the drums of war

[Deathwatch Marines]
Aliens! Aliens!

[Watch Captain]
Let's go kill a few, men!

[Aspect Warriors]
Savages! Savages!

[Inquisitor Ratcliffe]
Now it's up to you, men!

[All]
(Aliens) Savages! (Aliens) Savages!
They are lesser creatures!
Now we sound the drums of war!

-Intermission-

[Taldeer]
They're going to kill him at sunrise, Grandmother Wraithbone.

[Grandmother Wraithbone]
You have to stop them!

[Taldeer]
I can't...

[Grandmother Wraithbone]
Child, remember your vision-

[Taldeer]
I was wrong, Grandmother Wraithbone, I followed the wrong path! I feel so lost...

[Taldeer]
The auspex... The spinning arrow...

[Grandmother Wraithbone]
It's the arrow from your vision!

[Taldeer]
I was right, it was pointing to him! Sunrise...

[Grandmother Wraithbone]
It's not too late, child! Let the spirits of the webway guide you! You know your path, child, now follow it!

-Part 2-
[Taldeer]
Is there nothing I can do?
Can I make these soldiers yield?
Is it only death that waits
Out there on the battlefield?

[Inquisitor Ratcliffe]
This will be the day ...
(Let's go men!)

[Eldrad]
This will be the morning ...
(Bring out the prisoner!)

[Deathwatch Marines and Aspect Warriors]
We will see them dying in the dust

[Taldeer]
I don't know what I can do
Still, I know that I must try

[Deathwatch Marines]
Now we make them pay

[Taldeer]
Isha, help my feet to fly

[Rangers]
Now without a warning ...

[Taldeer]
Kurnous, help my heart be great

[Deathwatch Marines]
Now we leave them blood and bone and rust

[Taldeer]
Spirits of the wraithbone cry ...

[Deathwatch Marines and Aspect Warriors]
It's them or us

[Taldeer]
Please don't let it be to late ...

[Deathwatch Marines and Aspect Warriors]
They're just a bunch of
Filthy, stinking

[Deathwatch Marines]
Aliens!

[Aspect Warriors]
Savages!

[Deathwatch Marines]
Daemons!

[Aspect Warriors]
Primates!

[Inquisitor Ratcliffe]
Kill them!

[Aspect Warriors]
Savages!

[Deathwatch Marines]
Aliens!

[Inquisitor Ratcliffe+Deathwatch Marines]
What are we waiting for?

[All]
Destroy their evil race
Until there's not a trace left

[Taldeer]
How loud are the drums of war

[Deathwatch Marines and Aspect Warriors]
We will sound the drums of war
(Savages! Savages!)
Now, we sound the drums of war
(Aliens! Aliens!)

[Inquisitor Ratcliffe]
They shall all succumb
The rotten xenos scum

[Aspect Warriors]
Now we sound the drums ... of ... war!

[Deathwatch Marines]
Of course it means the drums ... of ... war!

[Taldeer]
Is the death of all I love
Carried in the drumming of war?

[Taldeer]
No! If you kill him, you'll have to kill me too.

[Eldrad]
Daughter, stand back.

[Taldeer]
I won't! I love him...

Pocahontas: Colors of the Wind[edit]

You think I'm strange and heretical
And you've been so many places
I guess it must be so
But still I cannot see
If the heretic is me
How can there be so much that you don't know?
You don't know ...

You think you own the gadgets you use
That they are just dead things you can claim
But I know every gun and cogitator
Has a life, has a spirit, has a name

You think the only people who are people
Are the people who look and think like you
But if you walk the footsteps of a stranger
You'll learn things you never knew you never knew

Have you ever heard the thunder of a titan's stride,
Or asked the lasgun why it has recoil?
Can you sing with all the voices of the machines?
Can you paint with all the colors of the oil?
Can you paint with all the colors of the oil?

Come feel the blessed current of electrodes
Come see the life support of He-On-Earth
Come examine the riches all around you
And for once, appreciate just what they're worth

The drop pod and the cruiser are my brothers
And all the power weapons are my friends
And we are all connected to each other
In a circuit, in a loop that never ends

How mighty can our empire grow?
If you stop our work, then you'll never know
And you'll never hear the thunder of a titan's stride.

For no matter on which task we spend our toil
We need to sing with all the voices of the machines
We need to paint with all the colors of the oil

You can own all of Space and still
Its just empty space until
You can paint with all the colors of the oil

Jungle Book: I Wanna Be Like You[edit]

Now I'm of caste Ethereal

Oh, a Tau VIP

I've reached the top and had to stop

And that's what botherin' me

I wanna be a man, gue'la

And stroll right onto Terra

And be able to approach the Golden Throne

And end this warring era!

Oh, oobee doo

I wanna be like you

I wanna walk like you

Talk like you, too

You'll see it's true

A xenos like me

Can learn to be human too

Gee, mister Aun

You're doin' real good

Now here's your part of the deal, cuz

Lay the secret on me of man's psyker powers

But I'm not a psyker!

Now don't try to kid me, gue'la

I made a deal with you

What I desire is man's psychic power

To make my dream come true

Give me the secret, gue'la

Clue me what to do

Give me the power of man's warp flower

So I can be like you

The Great Mouse Detective: The World's Greatest Criminal Mind[edit]

[Ratigan]
My friends, we are about to embark on the most odious, the most evil, the most diabolical scheme of my illustrious career. A crime to top all crimes, a crime that will live in infamy!

Tomorrow evening, our beloved planetary governess celebrates her diamond jubilee. And, with the enthusiastic help of our good friend Magos Flaversham, it promises to be a night she will never forget. Her last night, and my first, as supreme ruler of all Londinium Prime!

From the brain that brought you the Black Bell Caper The head that made headlines on every dataslate And wondrous things like the Gunmetal Job That cunning display that made all hivers sob

Now comes the real tour de force Tricky and wicked, of course! My earlier crimes were fine for their times But now that I’m at it again An even grimmer plot has been simmering In my great criminal brain

[Chorus]
Even meaner? You mean it? Worse than the widows and orphans you drowned? You’re the best of the worst around Oh Ratigan Oh Ratigan The rest fall behind To Ratigan To Ratigan Lord Tzeentch’s greatest criminal mind!

[Ratigan]
Ratigan (speaking) Thank you, thank you. But it hasn’t all been Amasec and Caviar. I’ve had my share of adversity, thanks to that miserable second-rate inquisitor, Basil of Baker Hive! For years, that insufferable pipsqueak has interfered with my plans. I haven’t had a moment’s peace of mind. But now, all that’s in the past! This time, nothing, not even Basil can stand in my way! All will bow before me!

[Chorus]
Oh Ratigan Oh Ratigan You’re tops and that’s that To Ratigan To Ratigan

[Bartimus]
To Ratigan, the sector's greatest Khornate.

[Ratigan]
What was THAT?! WHAT DID YOU CALL ME?!

[Mutant 1]
Oh, he didn't mean it my lord.

[Mutant 2]
I-it was just a slip of one of his tongues!

[Ratigan]
I am NOT A KHORNATE!

[Mutant 3]
'Course you're not, you're Tzeentchian!

[Mutant 4]
Yeah, that's right, Tzeentchian!

[Mutant 5]
A really angry Tzeentchian!

[Ratigan]
SILENCE!! Oh my dear Bartimus, I'm afraid that you've gone and upset me...you know what happens when someone upsets me... I trust there will be no further interruptions. And now, as you were singing...?

[Chorus]
Even louder! We'll shout it! No one can doubt what we know you can do You’re more evil than even you Oh Ratigan Oh Ratigan You’re one of a kind To Ratigan To Ratigan Lord Tzeentch’s greatest criminal mind!

The Lion King: Be Prepared[edit]

[Ghazghkull]
I NEVA FOUGHT YA GROTS WUZ ESSETCHUL

YOUZ RUNTY, AN' UNSPEEKABLY WEAK

BUT ME FINKS YOUZ GOT SUM POTENTCHUL

IF WAAGH IS WOT YOU REELY SEEK


[Ghazghkull]
'S KLARE FROM YER VAKANT EXPRESHUNS

DA ORK IS NOT ALL ON OP’STARES

BUT WEZ TALKIN' BOSSES AN' SUCCESSUNS

EVA YOUZ KENT BE CUGHT UNAWARES!


[Ghazghkull]
SO PREPARE FOR DA FIGHT OVVA LOIFETIME

PREPARE FOR SENSHANAL NOOZ

A SHINY NEW ERA

‘S STOMPIN’ NEARA


[Boyz]
But ‘ere getting shot op!

[Ghazghkull]
JUS’ LISSIN YA SQUIG GOB!


[Ghazghkull]
AH KNO DIS SOUNDS SORTID,

BUT YOUZ GON BE REWARDID

WHEN AT LAST AH'M GIVVIN MY TEEF

WAAAAGH WE FINALY DARED

BE PREPARED!!!


[Boyz]
Yeah! Be prepared! Wez gon be prepared! ...Fer wot?

[Ghazghkull]
DEFF OV DA BOSS!

[Boyz]
Why? Did da boss say so?

[Ghazghkull]
NO YA GROTS, SES MORK. AN' GORK TOO!

[Boyz]
Great ideah! Who ned a boss! No Boss! No Boss!

Waagh--Waagh-Waagh--Waaagh-Waaagh!

[Ghazghkull]
IDIUTS! DERE WILL BE A BOSS!

[Boyz]
But youz sed...

[Ghazghkull]
AH WILL BE BOSS! WAAAGH WIW ME AND YOUZ NEVA GON BE KRAMPED AGAIN!

[Boyz]
Yay! Awwwwwwroight! 'ail to da Boss!

[Chorus]
'AIL TO DA BOSS

'AIL TO DA BOSS!!!

SEEMS DAT WE'LL SOON BE KONNEKTID

TO A BOSS WHO'LL BE ALL TIME ADORD


[Ghazghkull]
OV’KOURSE, KVID PRO KVO, YOUZ EXPECTID

TO BRING CERTAIN DUTYZ ONBOARD

DA FUCHA IZ LITTERD WIW TROPHIES

AN DOUGH BIGGEST BOSS AH 'ILL BE

DA POINT DAT AH MUST EMFASAZ ES:

YA WON'T GET TA WAAAAAAAAAAAAGH WIWOUT ME!!!!

[Ghazghkull]
SO GIT PREPARED FOR DA WAAAAAAGH OV’ DA CENTURY!
[Chorus]
(Oooh!)
[Ghazghkull]
BE PREPARED FOR DA BRUTALEST KUNNIN
[Chorus]
(Oooh Waagh, Waagh, Waagh!)
[Ghazghkull]
MASSIVELY CHOPPY!
[Chorus]
(We’ll haf Waagh!)
[Ghazghkull]
DED BIG AN’SHOOTY!
[Chorus]
(En’less Waagh!)
[Ghazghkull]
CRED’IBLY STOMPY!
[Chorus]
(‘Ere we go!)
[Ghazghkull]
WILL MAKE SURE THAT ME!
[Chorus]
(Fo’ da Waagh!)
[Ghazghkull]
BE DA BOSS UNDISPUTED
[Chorus]
(Aaaaaaah...)
[Ghazghkull]
RESPECTID, SALUTID
[Chorus]
(...aaaaaaah!)
[Ghazghkull]
AN' SEEN FER DA BOSS DAT AH AM
[Chorus]
(Oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo)
[Ghazghkull]
YES MA' CHOPPAS AN SHOOTAS ARE BEARED BE PREPARED!!!

[All]
WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!

Aladdin: A Whole New World[edit]

[Ghazghkull]
I’ll kill da ooniverse!
Burn’s it, smash’s it, stomp’s it!
Tell me Yarrick now when’s did I last
Get’s a nice surprise?

[Yarrick]
Well, just open your eyes!

[Ghazghkull]
Look at all of dese wonders!
So much chance ‘ere for plunders
On a mighty fighitn ride!
Armageddon!
With kool, amazin rockrete pits
Not normal humie runts
An’ no weak punts
Or tribes of smaller orkish gits

[Yarrick]
Armageddon!
A wondrous place of giant hives
Where billions of souls
Live like moles
Never see the sky in all their lives

[Ghazghkull]
Never da sky in all dere lives

[Yarrick]
Unbelievable war
Orks coming on them like rain
Fighting, dying and much pain
Through deserts of blackened waste
Armageddon!

[Ghazghkull]
Don’t you dare leave dis place!

[Yarrick]
A hundred million fallen souls

[Ghazghkull]
I’s wants you to stay ‘ere

[Yarrick]
There’s so much shooting here,
And so much fear
I won’t ever leave this war-torn world

[Ghazghkull]
Armageddon

[Yarrick]
I think I am stuck here

[Ghazghkull]
Wit new fun chances of fightin

[Yarrick]
Everyday it gets harder

[Both]
I’ll chase you, gun in hand
Across this land
Let me share Armageddon
with you

[Ghazghkull]
Armageddon

[Yarrick]
Armageddon

[Ghazghkull]
Dat’s where I waaaagh

[Yarrick]
That’s where I stand

[Ghazghkull]
A fight at hand!

[Yarrick]:
On this black sand

[Both]
So don’t you leave!

Mulan: I'll Make a Tau Out of You[edit]

Let's begin your training - to defeat the Orks
Did they send me Fio'las when I asked for Shas?
The orks will try to kill us all
But they will hit an endless wall
Mister, I'll make a tau from you all

Patient as a gun drone
But on plasma within
Once you aim your rifle
You are sure to win
You're a spineless, mob of idiots
And you haven't got a clue
Somehow I'll make a tau out of you

I'm never gonna catch my breath
I bet I'm gonna get us all shot
Boy, was I a fool in school for cutting gym
This guy's got 'em scared to death
I bet I'm gonna get us all caught
Now I really wish that I knew how to swim

(Chorus:)
Be a tau
We must be sleek as the Barracuda
Be a tau
With all the force of a orca dropship
Be a tau
With all the strength of a mighty railgun
Magnificent as the bright side of the good

Time is racing toward us till the Orks arrive
Heed my every order and you might survive
You're a pain to me, a bane to me
So pack up, deport you're through
How could I make a tau out of you?

(Chorus:)
Be a tau
We must be swift as the Barracuda
Be a tau
With all the force of a Orca dropship
Be a tau
With all the strength of a mighty railgun
Magnificent as the bright side of the good

(Chorus:)
Be a tau
We must be swift as the Barracuda
Be a tau
With all the force of a Orca Dropship
Be a tau
With all the strength of a mighty railgun
Magnificent as the bright side of the good

Beauty and the Beast: Angron[edit]

[Kharn:] Gosh it disturbs me to see you, Angron
Without a good war to wage
Every guy here'd love to be you, Angron
Even when frothing with rage
Every single World Eater was sired by you
Every man before you shall bow
Ev'ryone's awed and inspired by you
And it's not very hard to see how

No one's slick as Angron
No one's sick as Angron
No one wields a chainaxe quite as quick as Angron
For there's no man around half as hearty
Perfect, a prime specimen
You ask any Adeptus Astartes
And they'll tell you whose Chapter they want to be in

[Berzerkers:] No one's been like Angron
Had thick skin like Angron
[Kharn:] No one's able to create a din like Angron
[Angron:] As a Primarch, yes, I'm intimidating
[Berzerkers:] My what a guy, that Angron

Give five "hurrahs!"
"For the Skull Throne!"
[Kharn:] Angron is the best
And the rest are all boned

[Berzerkers:] No one fights like Angron
Or ignites like Angron
[Champion:] In a riot nobody incites like Angron
[Daemonettes:] For there's no one as fearsome or angry
[Angron:] My raw energy cannot be caged
[Kharn:] Not a bit of him's scraggly or mangy
[Angron] (That's right!)
I'm bursting with boundless and unbridled rage

[Berzerkers:] No one hits like Angron
[Raptor:] Fights in pits like Angron
[Kharn:] In a BloodBowl match no one can blitz like Angron
[Angron:] I'm especially fond of obliterating
(Kablooey!)
[Berzerkers:] Ten points for Angron!

[Angron:] In the arena I received nerve implants
So I'd fight with no fear or remorse
So I gave my legion the same nerve implants
Now they are an unstoppable force

[Berzerkers:] No one shoots like Angron
No one loots like Angron
[Kharn:] Crushes skulls under ceremite boots like Angron
[Angron:] I use enemy heads for my decorating
[Berzerkers:] My what a guy, Angron!

Beauty and the Beast: Gaston[edit]

[Gaston:] Who does she think she is? That lich has tangled with

               the wrong Paladin! No one says "die" to Gaston!

[LeFou:] Heh heh. Darn right. [Gaston:] Plane-shifted! Hold-Personed! Publicly Humiliated! Why, it's

               more than I can bear.

[LeFou:] More beer? [Gaston:] What for? Nothing helps. I'm disgraced. [LeFou:] Who, you? Never! Gaston, you've got to pull yourself

               together.
               Gosh it disturbs me to see you, Gaston
               Looking so down in the dumps
               Every Fighter here'd love to be you, Gaston
               Even when taking your lumps
               There's no man in the party as admired as you
               You're ev'ryone's favorite guy
               Ev'ryone's awed and inspired by you
               And it's not very hard to see why
               No one smites like Gaston
               No one fights like Gaston
               No one puts down those zombies and wights like Gaston
               For there's no man in town half as manly
               Perfect, a pure paragon
               You can ask any Priest, God or Cleric

And they'll tell you whose crusade they prefer to be ooooooon!


[Chorus:] No one's been like Gaston

               A Paladin like Gaston

[LeFou:] No one's got a swell cleft in his chin like Gaston [Gaston:] As a specimen, yes, I'm intimidating [Chorus:] My what a guy, that Gaston

               Give five "hurrahs!"
               Give twelve "hip-hips!"

[LeFou:] Gaston is the best

               And the rest is all drips

[Chorus:] No one Detects like Gaston

               lacks defects like Gaston

[Cronie:] That foul villain's plans nobody wrecks like Gaston [Bimbettes:] For there's no one as burly and brawny [Gaston:] As you see I win duels without fail [LeFou:] Not a bit of him's scraggly or scrawny [Gaston] (That's right!)

               And ev'ry last inch of me's covered with mail.

[Cronies:] No one Turns like Gaston [Townsman:] witches burns like Gaston [LeFou:] A large pile of xp no one earns like Gaston [Gaston:] I'm especially good at exterminating

               (Ka-Smite!)

[Chorus:] Ten points for Gaston!

[Gaston:] When I was a lad I killed four dozen orcs

               Ev'ry morning to help me get strong
               And now that I'm grown I kill five dozen orcs
               So I've roughly the might of King Kong!

[Chorus:] No one heals like Gaston

               Makes brutes squeal like Gaston

[LeFou:] Then goes tromping around wearing steel like Gaston [Gaston:] I use troll skulls in all of my decorating [Chorus:] Say it again

               Who's a man among men?
               And then say it once more
               Who's the hero next door?
               Who's a super success?
               Don't you know? Can't you guess?
               Ask his fans and his five hangers-on
               There's just one guy in town who's got all of it down

[LeFou:] And his name's G-A-S- T -

               G-A-S-T -  E  -
               G-A-S-T-O  -  oh!

[Chorus:] Gaston

Mulan: A God Worth Killing For[edit]

[Pre-heresy marines]
It’s a long time since we’ve seen a sign of our home

[Angron] Like a mindless grox, I guess we are doomed to roam

[Pre-heresy marines]
Amidst the clash of wars, our orders, are easy to ignore

[Horus]
Hey!
Imagine bowing to a god worth KILLING for?

[Pre-heresy marine]
Huh?

[Horus]
That’s what we need, a god worth KILLING for!

[Fulgrim]
I want one with a perfect form with skin that has no scars

[Angron]
My god will have a pair of horns, with hide as red as Mars

[Magnus]
I couldn’t care less about war or about dreams
It all depends on sneaky schemes

[pre-heresy marines]
Maim kill burn
Ah!

[Angron]
And the other Legions think they’re fighting for Man?

[Horus]
But they still ignore the rewards of a god’s plan

[pre-heresy marines]
Right now all we do for our cause is fight chore after chore

[Horus]
What do we need?

[pre-heresy marines]
A god worth KILLING for!

[Angron]
I think my god demands skulls

[Magnus]
Mine leaves no chance unmined

[Alpharius]
Uh…How bout a...god that destroys all
Exterminates mankind?

[All]
Neh…

[Mortarion]
My many pleas grant me disease that makes stomachs stir

[Angron]
My pleas make me a blood-mad KILLER

[Horus]
I’ve a god who can mix his fate into all lands

[Angron]
But I’ve a god who has such destructive hands

[pre-heresy marines]
When we have our gods not one of us will need the Emperor

[Horus]
What do we need?

[Pre-heresy marines]
A god worth KILLING for

(Marching in from the other side, the loyalist marines come, in the middle of their own song)

[Guilliman]
Who do we love?

[Loyalist marines]
Our mighty Emperor!
(Whistling)
Our mighty Emper…

(They freeze in horror, confronted by the pre-heresy marines, now full chaos space marines)

Mulan: Honor to us all[edit]

This is what you give me to work with?
Well Sister, I've seen worse.
We're gonna turn this Sow's ear
Into an adamanitum purse

We'll have you trained and armed.
Indoctrinated till you are alarmed.
Trust my recipe and Chaos'll be harmed
You'll bring glory to us all

Wait and see, when we're through
The boys will gladly go to war with you.
With good fortune and a great hair-do
You'll bring glory to us all.

A girl can bring her family
great glory in one way
By fighting for the Emprah
And this could be the day

The Priests wants girls with good taste (Calm, obedient)
Who works fast paced
With a good bolter and a tiny waist
You'll bring glory to us all

We all must serve our Emperor
Who guards us from his son
The men by being guards
But the girls will get it done

When we're through you can't fail
Like the Emperor you will prevail
How could any Priest say no sale?
You'll bring glory to us all.

[Canoness] An imperial eagle for serenity, a skull for devotion
Flasks of promethium for beauty
You must proudly show it
Add another skull, just for luck
And even you can't blow it!

[Sister] Emperor hear my plea!
Help me not to make a fool of me!
And to not taint your great glory!
Keep the Imperium standing tall!
As scary as the great deceiver
We will face the unbeliever!

[Citizens] Destiny guard our girls
And our future as it fast unfurls
Please look kindly on these armoured pearls
Each a perfect soldier in your name!

Please bring glory to us
Please bring glory to us
Please bring glory to us
Please bring glory to us all

The Hunchback of Notre Dame: Hellfire[edit]

[Inquisitor Frollo]: Have mercy, my Emprah, You know I am a righteous man. Of my virtue I am justly proud.

Have mercy, my Emprah, You know I'm so much purer than The common, vulgar, heretical crowd!

Then tell me, my Emprah Why I see her standing there, Why her ghosthelm's eyes still scorch my soul?

I feel her, I see her! The sun caught in her spirit stones Is blazing in me out of all control!

Like fire! Warpfire! This fire in my skin! This burning Desire Is turning me to sin!

It's not my fault! I'm not to blame! It is the Eldar girl, the Witch who set this flame!

It's not my fault, It's Tzeentch's plan! He made foul xenos so much stronger than a man!

Protect me, my Emprah! Don't let foul Taldeer cast her spell! Don't let heresy sear my flesh and bone! Destroy the Farseer! And let her feel Chaos's flames Or else let her be mine and mine alone!

[Guardsman]: Inquisitor Frollo, the Eldar witch has escaped.

[Inquistor Frollo]: What?

[Guardsman]: She's nowhere in the fortress...she's gone.

[Inquisitor Frollo]: But how, I...nevermind! Get out, you idiot!

I'll find her! I'll find her if I have to glass the entire system!

Warpfire! Dark fire! Now Taldeer, it's your turn! Choose me or Your pyre! Be mine or you will BURN!

Emprah's mercy on me...

Emprah's mercy on her...

But she will be mine or SHE WILL BURN!!!

Aladdin:Daemon Prince Ali[edit]

Prince Ali! Mighty is he, Ali ababwa!

Strong as 10 Space Marine men definitely!

He has faced the Zealoting hordes

A hundred Grey Knights with swords

Who sent those Fools to their lord?

Why, Prince Ali...

He's got seventy-five golden Screamers

Purple Horrors He's got fifty-three

When it comes to exotic-type Daemons

Has he got a warp?

I'm telling you, it's a world-class Daemonology!

Prince Ali! Handsome is he, Ali Ababwa

That physique! How can I speak

Weak at the knee

Well, reality is what we shall tear,

we'll shatter the veil, so prepare

To gawk and grovel and stare at Prince Ali!

He's got ninety-five White Scar mon-keighs

(He's got the mon-keighs, let's see the mon-keighs)

And imbues all with mutations for free

(He's generous, so generous)

He's got slaves, he's got servants and flunkies (Proud to worship him)

They bow to his whim love serving him

They're just feverish with loyalty to Ali! Prince Ali!

Prince Ali!

Amorous he! Ali Ababwa!

Heard your planet was a sight lovely to see

And that, good people, is why he got dolled up and dropped by

With sixty Juggernauts, bloodletters galore

With his Fiends and Nurglings

A war band and more

With his forty Flamers, his cultists, his traitors

His Furies that warble on key

Make way for prince Ali!

Aladdin: Friend Like Me[edit]

Well the Emperor had them twenty legions

Eldrad had a thousand plots

But master you in luck 'cause up your sleeves

You got a brand of magic never fails

You got some power in your corner now

Some heavy ammunition in your camp

You got some punch, pizzazz, yahoo and how

See all you gotta do is ask us Gods

And I'll say

Mister Horus, sir

What will your pleasure be?

Let me take your order

Jot it down

You ain't never had a friend like me

No no no

Life is your restaurant

And I'm your maitre d'

C'mon whisper what it is you want

You ain't never had a friend like me

Yes sir, we pride ourselves on service

You're the boss

The king, the shah

Say what you wish

It's yours! True dish

How about a little more Warp Power?

Have some of world "A"

Try all of world "B"

I'm in the mood to help you dude

You ain't never had a friend like me

Can your friends do this?

Do your friends do that?

Do your friends pull this out their little hat?

Can your friends go, poof?

Well, looky here

Can your friends go, Abracadabra, let 'er rip

And then make the Loyalists disappear?

So doncha sit there slack jawed, buggy eyed

I'm here to answer all your midday prayers

You got me bona fide, certified

You got a Chaos God for your chare d'affaires

I got a powerful urge to help you out

So what-cha wish? I really wanna know

You got a list that's three miles long, no doubt

Well, all you gotta do is ask like so - and oh

Mister Horus, sir, have a wish or two or three

I'm on the job, you big nabob

You ain't never had a friend, never had a friend

You ain't never had a friend, never had a friend

You ain't never had a friend like me

You ain't never had a friend like me, hah!

Snow white: Om nom Om nom[edit]

Om nom Om nom Its Off To Eat We Go!!

We Om nom nom nom nom nom nom nom

In our Hive the whole day through

To Kill Eat Kill Eat Kill Eat Eat Eat Eat

Its what we like to do

It ain't no trick

To get fat quick

If ya kill kill kill

With a talon or a gun

On the Worlds (Echo: On the worlds)

LOUDER: ON THE WORLDS(echo: ON THE WORLDS)

Where a million life-forms

LONG: ddddiiinnnneee (om nom nom)

We Om nom nom nom nom nom nom nom

From early mornin' til' night

We Om nom nom nom nom nom nom nom

On everything in sight

We take our time

Then find some more

There's thousands to be sometime born

And We dont know what we eat them for

We Om nom nom noma nom nom

Little Mermaid: Pillage This World[edit]

An Imperial forgeworld!

Chaos be praised!

Red Corsairs, to your drop pods,

your armaments raised!


We'll have plenty of slaves and loot

to haul back to the Maelstrom


Look at those stockpiles

they've got quite a hoard!

What shall we slaughter them with?

Bolter? Chainsword?


Looking around here, you'd think

"We're going to kill and enslave everything!"


I slaughter Conscripts and Guardsmen and Ratlings!

I've killed Ogryns, Space Marines, and more! You see a Rhino?

I see a trophy!

For all of the mayhem, and treasure

We'll wage war!


We like to eviscerate and mutilate

grab a Chainaxe, and slice up some bitches

watching the Guardsman scream at the lack of his - what was that?

Spleen?


When you're marked by the dark gods,

life's a lot of fun!

Your day is filled with murder and bloodshed!

You get to indulge in that activity of Slaanesh's - what was that?

Rape?


You're all going to die,

or at least be enslaved

bow down to the dark gods

and you may be saved!


With diabolical glee

It's going to be me

who pillages this world!


How could I glance

At a Land Raider

and not steal it?


How could I listen

to the Guardsmen's shrill screams

and not laugh?


I'd break a Commissar's back

before I'd rack

his corpse to

the hull of my Rhino

perforated on top of the bladed

rows of spines on top of the roof


We Chaos Lords so seldom get bored!

When we've our dark urges, we gleefully fulfill them!

After we've conquered and plundered

we simply move on!


Let flames consume all!

Let the galaxy burn!

We'll defile the

Imperium at every turn!

Can you not see?

It's going to be me, who pillages this world!

Little Mermaid: Under the Sea[edit]

The shoeshine is always brighter On somebody else's boot
Fools dream about betraying the Emprah' But such feelings I shall root.
Just think of the pains you'll suffer Behind my punishment door
Such a painful death awaits you So think of those things no more!

No Heresy
No Heresy
Soldier it's better
Free of my fetters
Take it from me
Out in the Eye they have no hope
In pain forever they must cope
While we devotin'
Full time to promotin'
No Heresy

Here in His light, we're happy
As off through miasma they stay
The Lost in the Eye ain't happy
They mourn 'cause the lost the way
But daemons in the Eye is lucky
Cause heretics here I'll find,
That day when I reveal their trech'ry
Guess who's gon' blow their mind? (Soldier: You-? *BLAM*)

No Heresy
No Heresy
Nobody beat us
Enslave or treat us
Ingloriously
We what the daemons like to corrupt
No heresy and their plans disrupt
We got no worries
Nor fear of furies
No Heresy
No Heresy
Since duty's first here
We suffer no fear
Naturally
Even the surgeon an' the vox
They get the urge to cleanse the pox
We got the spirit
You got to hear it
No Heresy

The guard fights so hard
The marines look so mean
The AdMech fix da tech
And they prayin' serene
The priests kill the beasts
Ogryns start clobberin'
The psyker has lost his soul! (Psyker: What about my sou-?*BLAM*)
The tanks crush da flanks
Ratlings, their rifles bring
The stormies fallin' out
The sisters, they sing!
The guard and navy
They never are lazy
An' oh I purge the foe!

No Heresy
No Heresy
When a foul daemon
Tries to corrupt men
My pistol fires free
What do they got? A lot of blood
We spill theirs in sod and mud
Each single man here
know how to pray here
No Heresy
Each young conscript here
My great wrath fear
No Heresy
Each vet'ran here
Know how to last here
That's why it's surer
To live more purer
No matter our places
We in the Emprah's graces
No Heresy

Frozen: Let it go[edit]

-Part 1-
The fire glows red on prospero tonight The Space Wolves we could not convince. A planet of sorcerers, and it looks like I'm the prince The warp is howling like this swirling storm inside Couldn't keep it in; Gods knows I've tried

Don't cast a spell, don't let them see Be the good cyclops you always have to be Conceal, don't feel, don't let them know Well now they know

Let it go, let it go Can't hold it back anymore

Let it go, let it go Turn away and slam the door I don't care what they're going to say Let prospero burn. The warp never bothered me anyway

It's funny how serving Tzeench Makes everything seem small And the Emperor that once controlled me Can't get to me at all

It's time to see what I can do To test the limits and break through No right, no wrong, no rules for me, I'm free!

Let it go, let it go I am one with the wind and sky Let it go, let it go You'll never see me cry Here I stand And here I'll stay Let the storm rage on

My power flurries through the air into the ground My soul is spiraling in daemonic force all around And one thought crystallizes like a sorcerous blast I'm never going back, the past is in the past

Let it go, let it go And I'll rise like the break of dawn Let it go, let it go That primarch slave is gone Here I stand In the light of day Let Prospero burn.

The Warp never bothered me anyway!


Dreamworks Adaptations[edit]

Although less prolific than Disney, some of Dreamworks' titles show great promise.

The Prince of Egypt: Playing with the Big Boys[edit]

[Cult Leaders]
By the power of Tzeentch...
Nurgle...Khorne...Slaanesh...Malal...
Magnus...Lorgar...Curze...Angron...
Fulgrim...Khârn...Lucius...Typhus...
Mortarion...Perturabo...
Abaddon...Alpharius...Erebus...Slyte...
Fabius...Ahriman...
Tzeentch...Nurgle...Khorne...Slaanesh...
Magnus...Lorgar...Curze...Angron...
Fulgrim...Khârn...Typhus...Lucius...
Malal...Slaanesh...Khorne...Nurgle...Tzeentch...

So you think you've got friends on High Terra
With the power to put us on the run
Well, forgive us if we give a chortle
You'll know what power is when we are done
Mortal...

You're playing with the daemons now
Playing with the daemons now (Oh, that's nice...)
Every spell and gesture
Tells you who's your master
You're playing with the daemons now

You're playing with the daemons now
You're playing with the daemons now
Stop this vain resistance
Embrace your true existence
Give in to temptation now
Pick up your powerfist, boy
You're playing with the daemons now!

[Chanting Cultists]
By the power of Tzeentch
Nurgle, Khorne, Slaanesh, Malal
Magnus, Lorgar, Curze, Angron
Mortarion, Perturabo
Malal, Slaanesh, Khorne, Nurgle...

[Cult Leaders]
You're playing with the daemons now
You're playing with the daemons now
By the might of Horus
You will kneel before us
Kneel to our splendorous power...
You try to keep faith
But you know we're right
And just to show we feel no spite
You can be our acolyte
But first, boy, it's time to betray
(All the way!)
Or your soul will be consumed, boy
You're playing with the daemons now
Playing with the daemons
Now!

The Prince of Egypt: The Plagues[edit]

[Chorus]
Thus said the Gods:
Since you refuse to yield your reign
All through the Imperium of Man...

I send your soldiers on thy self
Into your space, throughout the void
Onto your worlds, into your streets
Into your habs, into your forts
Upon your ranks, on your troops
Upon your people in your hives
Into your minds, into your souls
Until you break, until you yield
I send the swarm, I send the horde
Thus said the Gods!

[Horus]
Once I called you father
Once I thought the chance
to make you proud
Was all I ever wanted...

[Chorus]
I send the thunder from the sky
I send the fire raining down

[Horus]
And even now I wish the Gods
had chose another
Serving as your foe on their behalf
Is the last thing that I wanted...

[Chorus]
I send a hail of burning ice
On every field, on every hive

[Horus]
This was my home
All this pain and devastation
It never had to be this way
All the warriors who suffer
From your stubbornness and pride...

[Chorus]
I send such fleets out through the void
The galaxy has never seen
On every globe, on every world
Until there's nothing left of green
I send my scourge, I send my sword
Thus said the Gods!

[Emperor]
You who I called my son
Why must you call down another blow?

[Chorus]
I send my scourge, I send my sword

[Horus]
Let my warriors rule

[Horus and Chorus]
Thus said the Gods

[Emperor]
You who I called my son
How could you have come to hate me so?
Is this what you wanted?

[Chorus]
I send the swarm, I send the horde...

[Emperor]
Then let my heart be hardened
And never mind how high the cost may grow
This will still be so:
I will never let my empire go...

[Chorus]
Thus said the Gods:

[Horus]
Thus said the Gods:

[Emperor]
I will not...

[Horus, Emperor, and Chorus]
Let your (my) empire go!

The Prince of Egypt: Deliver us[edit]

[Kabalite Warriors]
Blood...Sweat...Pain...Soul...Faster!
Blood...And lift...Soul...And Pull
Pain...And raise up...Soul...Faster!

[Imperial Slaves]
With the sting of the whip on my shoulder
With the salt of my sweat on my brow
Emperor, God up high
Can you hear your people cry:
Help us now
This dark hour...

Deliver us
Hear our call
Deliver us
Lord of all, remember us, here in this xeno waste
Deliver us
There's a world you promised us
Deliver us to the promised world...

[Yocheved - Imperial captured agent]
Yal-di ha-tov veh ha-rach
(My good and tender son)
Al ti-ra veh al tif-chad
(Don't be frightened and don't be scared)
My son, I have nothing I can give
But this chance that you may live
I pray we'll meet again
If He will deliver us

(song is either high or low gothic, whichever works)

[Slaves]
Deliver us
Hear our prayer
Deliver us
From despair
These years of slavery grow too cruel to stand
Deliver us
There's a world you promised us
Deliver us
Out of bondage and
Deliver us to the promised world...

[Yocheved]
Hush now, my baby
Be still, love, don't cry
Sleep as you're embraced by God
Sleep and remember my last lullaby
So he'll be with you when you dream

(Yocheved gives the baby to a Marine Scout scouting the planet)

Noble Astartes
Fly gently for me
Such precious cargo you bear
Do you know somewhere
he can live free?
Astartes, deliver him there.</br>

[Young SOB Initiate]
Brother, you're safe now
And safe may you stay
For I have a prayer just for you:
Grow, baby brother
Come back someday
Come and deliver us, too...

[Slaves]
Deliver us
Send a shepherd to shepherd us
And deliver us to the promised world

[Yocheved]
Deliver us!
Marine, deliver him there...

Other Sources[edit]

Through random circumstance or creative providence, some songs and poems lend themselves to grimdarking regardless of what media they are tied to.

Team America Theme[edit]

All rise for the Imperial Anthem. Failure to sing along in full chorus is punishable by death!

Imperium...
Imperium...

Imperium, FUCK YEAH!
Coming again, to save the mother fucking day yeah,
Imperium, FUCK YEAH!
Subjugation is the only way yeah,
Heretics your game is through, 'cause now you have to answer to,
Imperium, FUCK YEAH!
So lick my butt, and suck on my balls,
Imperium, FUCK YEAH!
What you going to do when we come for you now,
It’s the dream that we all share; it’s the hope for tomorrow

FUCK YEAH!

Emperor, FUCK YEAH!
Space Marines, FUCK YEAH!
Guardsmen, FUCK YEAH!
Navy, FUCK YEAH!
Mechanicus, FUCK, YEAH!
PDF, FUCK YEAH!
Arbitrators, FUCK YEAH!
Inquisition, FUCK YEAH!

FUCK YEAH!

Ogryns, FUCK YEAH!
Ratlings, FUCK YEAH!
Squats, FUCK YEAH!
Ecclesiarchy, FUCK YEAH!
Sororitas, FUCK YEAH!
Big tits, FUCK YEAH!
Grox steaks, FUCK YEAH!
Amasec, FUCK YEAH!
Lho sticks, FUCK YEAH!
Commissars, Fuck yeah... Fuck yeah? FUCK YES *BLAM*

Order, FUCK YEAH!
Discipline, FUCK YEAH!
Imperial Creed, FUCK YEAH!
Sebastian Thor, FUCK YEAH!
Scrumball, FUCK YEAH!
Administratum, FUCK YEAH!
Munitorum, FUCK YEAH!
Assasinorum, FUCK YEAH!
Titan Legions, FUCK YEAH!
Sanctioned Psykers, fuck yeah... fuck yeah? FUCK YES *BLAM*
Uplifting Primer, FUCK YEAH!
Tomes of Knowledge (as have been deemed suitable for public reading by the Emperor's most Holy Inquisition), FUCK YEAH!

The Wurzels: Combine Harvester (Brand New Key)[edit]

I drove my Baneblade through your bunker last night
(Ooh ar ooh ar)
I crushed them 'eretics 'neath the treads to keep quiet
(Ooh ar ooh ar)
Now somethin's tellin' me, you've finally noticed me
(Ooh ar ooh ar)
Come on now darlin' you got somethin' I need

Cos I've got a Leman Russ Demolisher and I'll give you the key
Come on let's mow the bastards down in perfect harmony
Oh I got 20 headshots and you got 43
Now I've got a Leman Russ Demolisher and I'll give you the key

I made her laugh *pew* Haha!

I'll Stick 'em in the guts, then give you all ya need
(Ooh ar ooh ar)
I'll have ya two or three times, I'm a man built for speed
(Ooh ar ooh ar)
And then I'll light me pipe up, and then I will cram
(Ooh ar ooh ar)
My heavy shells up their arses while we purge all the land

Cos I've got a Leman Russ Demolisher and I'll give you the key
Come on let's mow the bastards down in perfect harmony
Oh I got 20 headshots and you got 43
Now I've got a Leman Russ Demolisher and I'll give you the key

Pphhwooaaarrr she's a lovel bit of stuff an'all

For seven years I've been stationed right here in this place
(Ooh ar ooh ar)
Taking pot-shots at the 'eretics in the face
(Ooh ar ooh ar)
Now if I cleaned me long-las would ya change yur mind
(Ooh ar ooh ar)
I'd polish hard enough to keep the standard flying high

Cos I've got a Leman Russ Demolisher and I'll give you the key
Come on let's mow the bastards down in perfect harmony
Oh I got 20 headshots and you got 43
Now I've got a Leman Russ Demolisher and I'll give you the key

Who loves ya baby? THE EMPEROR!

Weren't we grand couple at that last big advance?
You had yur eviscerator and I had me long-las
In yur new power armour with yur incense smellin' grand
I wanted to duel you one-on-one, show you I'm good with me 'ands

Cos I've got a Leman Russ Demolisher and I'll give you the key
Come on let's mow the bastards down in perfect harmony
Oh I got 20 headshots and you got 43
Now I've got a Leman Russ Demolisher and I'll give you the key

Aarrr, you're a fine lookin' woman and I can't wait to get me hands on yur holy relics haha!

Underfist: Hallowen Bash[edit]

When Daemons come to wreck your world And you need weapons to assist you And the Space Marines just ain't around Then Powerfist will rescue you.

It's what they do, Oh yeah! Oh yeah! Oh yeah! Oh yeah! Oh yeah!

Power... Power... Power, Power, Power fist! Power, Power, Power fist!

When the warp attacks And daemonic monsters run amock And you're possessed by some form of soul Then what you need is a psyker now!

Power fist, they're free! Oh yeah! Oh yeah! Oh yeah! Oh yeah! Power fist, go!


Queen: Bohemian Rhapsody[edit]

Iz dis da real life?
Iz dis jus' fannasy?
Caught in a big push,
No 'scape from reality.
Open ya eyes, Look up at da skies and see,
I's jus' a poor boy, dun need no sympafy,
'Cause I'm big 'n mean, not a grot, chop and smash, shoot a lot,
Any way the waaagh goes doesn't really matter to me, to me.

Warboss, just killed an ork,
Put mah dakka 'gainst 'is 'ead, pulled my trigger, now 'e's dead.
Warboss, waaagh had just begun,
But now I's gone and shot up all ya nobs.
Warboss, ooh, Didn' mean ta make ya mad,
If I's not back again dis time tomorra,
Keep stompin', keep stompin' as if nuffin' really matters.

Too late, I gots shot up,
Sends hurtin' down me spine, body's aching all the time.
Goodbye, ev'rybody, I've got to go,
Gotta leave you all behind and face da troof.
Warboss, ooh, I dun' wanna die,
I sometimes wish I'd never waaaghed at all.

I see a little silhouetto of a beakie,
Zoggin' humies, Zoggin' humies, is it your turn to stomp now?
Thundabolts and Lightnins, very, very fright'ning me.
(Gorkamorka.) Gorkamorka. (Gorkamorka.) Gorkamorka, Gorkamorka Gork n' Mork
Waaaaagh! I's just a poor boy an' nobody loves me.
'E's just a poor boy from a poor goff tribe,
Spare 'im 'is loife from dis monstrosity.
Easy come, easy go, will yas lemme go?
Xenos! No, we will not let you go.
(Let him go!) Xenos! We will not let you go.
(Let him go!) Xenos! We will not let you go.
(Let me go.) Will not let you go.
(Let me go.) Will not let you go. (Let me go.) Ah.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
(Oh Brother Captain, Brother Captain.) Bruvva Kaptin, lemme go.
Da Commissar 'as a boltgun put aside for me, for me, for me.

So you fink you can shoot me and spit in my eye?
So you fink you can curse me and leave me to die?
Oh, snotling, can't do dis to me, snotling,
Jus' gonna get out, jus' gotta get stompin' again!

Nuffin' really matters, Anyone can see,
Nuffin' really matters,
Nuffin' really matters to me.

Any way the waaagh goes.

Overhead: A pint of ale[edit]

IF YOU LIKE TO DRINK BEER, I TELL YOU I'M YOUR DWARF,
YE SIP SOME, YOU CHUG SOME, IT'S ALL THE SAME TO ME!
(killer banjo solo)
I DON'T SHARE YOUR GREED, THE ONLY DRINK I NEED IS
A PINT OF ALE, A PINT OF ALE!!!!!!

Robert Browning: My Last Duchess[edit]

   That's my last adjutant painted on the wall, 
Looking as if she were alive. I call
That piece a wonder, now: The Confessor
Worked busily that day, and there she stands.
Will't please you sit and look at her? I said
Confessor by design, for never read
Strangers like you that pictured countenance,
The depth and passion of its earnest glance,
But to myself they turned (since none puts by
The curtain I have drawn for you, but I)
And seemed as they would ask me, if they durst,
How such a glance came there; so not the first
Are you to turn and ask thus. Sir, 'twas not
My orders only, called that eager spot,
Of joy into her pallid cheek; perhaps
A Guardsman chanced to say "She wears her cap
Askew, as it please her," or "Prayer
Must never hope to match a lock of her hair
Taken from her head": such stuff
Was unacceptable, I thought, and cause enough
For flagellation (she did not). She had
An attitude - how shall I say - relaxed
Too easily beguiled; she listened to anything
She looked on, and her ears heard many things.
Sir, 'twas all one! Morning prayers, arrests,
The whispers of the Dark Gods in her breast,
The impious jibes some vulgar soldier
Would throw her way, unaware of her
Position and my power. All and each
would draw from her alike the approving speech,
Or an ear at least. She took confession - good - but prayed
Somehow - I know how now - as if her faith was any other jade.
A heretic. Who'd stoop to blame
This sort of crime? Even had you time
For a trial - which I had not - for heretic slime
And to say she burns, and to say "Just This
Is your fair fate, you lying bitch,
Traitor to the Emperor" - and if she let
Herself be lessoned so, nor plainly set
Her wits to yours, forsooth, and made excuse,
- E'en then would be some stooping, and I choose
Never to stoop. Oh sir, she prayed, no doubt,
On every feast, but which gods blessed without
Those same prayers? This became clear. I made commands.
Then prayers turned into screams. There she stands,
As if alive. Will't please you rise? We'll meet
The Governor below, then. I repeat,
The Inquisition's munificence
Is ample warrant that no just pretence
Of confession will be disallowed;
Though to find heresy, as I avowed,
At starting, is my object. Nay, we'll go
Together down, sir. Notice this seal, though,
The skull and I, together as you see,
Which gives certain... powers to me.

Charlie Daniels Band: The Devil Went Down to Georgia[edit]

The daemon went down to Terra,
He was looking for a soul to steal.
He was in a bind 'cos he was way behind: he was willin' to make a deal.
When he came across this young man chainswordin' on a fiddle and playin' it hot.
And the daemon jumped upon a hickory stump and said: "Boy, let me you what:"
"I bet you didn't know it, but I'm a fiddle player too."
"And if you'd care to take a dare, I'll make a bet with you."
"Now you play a pretty good fiddle, boy, but give the daemon his due:"
"I bet a fiddle of gold against your soul, 'cos I think I'm better than you."
The boy said: "Mah nahme's Boreale ahnd it might be ah sin,"
"But Ah'll take yooouuur bet, yoouugghhrr gonna regrort, 'cos Ah'm the best thawt's ever beahn."

Boreale, rosin up your bow and play your fiddle hard,
'Cause hellwarp's broke loose in Terra and Tzeentch deals the cards.
And if you win you get this shiny fiddle made of gold.
But if you lose, the daemon gets your soul.

The daemon opened up his case and he said, "I'll start this show."
And blue fire flew from his fingertips as he rosined up his bow.
And he pulled the bow across the strings and it made an evil hiss.
Then a band of Nurglings joined in and it sounded somethin' like this:
When the daemon finished, Boreale said,
"Worl, you're prehtty guud, oorrld sawn,"
"But sit dorn in that cheer rigghht ther and let me show you whore it's dorne"

Fire on the monolith.
Run, boys, run
Slaanesh in the House of the Rising Sun.
Squiqs in the bread pan pickin' out dough.
Granny, does your cyberdog bite?
No, child, no.

The daemon bowed his head because he knew that he'd been beat.
And he laid that golden fiddle on the ground at Boreale's feet.
Boreale said, "Daemon, just cuhm on baahhck if you ever wahnt to trah agahin."
"'Cause Ah told you once, you son of a grot,"
"Ah'm the best that's evah bihn."

Iron Maiden: Aces High[edit]

There goes da sirun dat warns o' da air raid
Den comz da sound o' da shootaz: DakDakkaDak
Owt fer da scramble we've godda git airborne
Godda git up fer da comin' attak.

Jump in da cockpit an start up da enginz
Lode up da grotz derz no time to muck about
Gavverin' speed as weeb 'ed down da runway
Godda git airborne an smoke dose gitz out

Scurryin', scramblin', flyin'
Rollin', turnin', divin', goin' in again
Scurryin', scramblin', flyin'
Rollin', turnin', divin'
Scurry, liv ter fly, fly ter liv, du or die
Won't ya scurry, liv ter fly, fly ter liv, Deffskwad 'igh.

Move in ter fire at da mainstream o' bombaz
Giv em some dakka an den turn away
Roll ober, spin round ter cumz in behind 'em
Move ter their blindsidz an firin' again

Runtie ships oe'r da Horizon, muv in behin' us
Down on da ground dere's jes deadboys and lootaz
'Eading up an turnin' our flash ter mug dem
'Eading straight fer dim meeb per-ss down on mi shootaz.

Rollin', turnin', divin'
Rollin', turnin', divin' ('ere we go agin!)
Rollin', turnin', divin'
Rollin', turnin', divin'
Scurry, liv ter fly, fly ter liv, du or die
Won't ya scurry, liv ter fly, fly ter liv, Deffskwad 'igh

Iron Maiden: The Trooper[edit]

You’ll take my life but I’ll take yours too
You’ll fire you railgun but I’ll run you through
So when you're waiting for the next attack
You’d better stand there’s no turning back

The Ethereal speaks as the charge begins
But on this battlefield no one wins
The smell of acrid smoke and krootox breath
As you plunge into a certain death

The horse he sweats with fear we break to run
The mighty roar of the Tau guns
And as we race towards the xenos wall
The screams of pain as my comrades fall

We hurdle bodies that lay on the ground
And the Tau fire another round
We get so near yet so far away
We won’t live to fight another day

(Guitar Solo)

We get so close near enough to fight
When a Firewarrior gets me in his sights
He pulls the trigger and I feel the blow
A burst of rounds take my horse below

And as I lay there gazing at the sky
My body’s numb and my throat is dry
And as I lay forgotten and alone
Without a tear I draw my parting groan

My Chemical Romance: The Black Parade (Intro)[edit]

WHEN I WAS
A GUARDSMAN,
MY SERGEANT TOOK ME TO EASTERN KRONUS
TO SERVE IN VICTORY BAY

HE SAID,
"SON WHEN YOU GROW UP,
WILL YOU BE THE SLAYER OF THE MUTANT,
AND THOSE WHO GO ASTRAY?"

HE SAID
"WILL YOU DEFEAT THEM,
THE DAEMONS, AND ALL THE FILTHY XENOS,
THE SCHEMES THAT THEY HAVE MADE?"

FOR ONE DAY, I LEAD YOU,
TO THE ELDAR, AND TAU AND ORKS AND NECRONS,
TO JOIN THE DARK CRUSADE."

Harvey Andrews: British Soldier[edit]

In a spaceport in the city a young guardsman stood
Talking to the natives there if they would
Some just stared in hatred, and others turned in pain
And the lonely guardsman boy wished he was home again

Come join glorious guard! Said the posters in his block
See new worlds and have your fun and serve your emperor
His skills were surely lacking and his family had to eat
So he took the emperors oath and enlisted for up to fight

For there was no fear of fighting, to the conquered he’d be sent
Just ten years getting paid to watch
Then leave a glorious victor, a man who’d made the grade
A medal and some land, and memories in trade

Then came the call of Tash’ren, as it had come before
Another bloody chapter in an unending war
The people stood on both sides, the people they stood behind
Another fight in futilities name, the weak against the blind

The guardsman stood between them, between the whistling stones
And then the broken bottles, that lead to more patrols
The crude bombs that burnt him, the nails that pierced his skin
And wish he’d just stayed home, working with his friends

The starport filled with people the guardsman soon was bored
But better in the port than where the soldiers warred
The room filled up with the xenos females, their younglings in tow
Who stared with itchy fingers at the guardsman and his gun

A yell of fear a pulse of engines the shattering of glass
The window of the port broke to let the package pass
A scream came from the defeated as they ran towards the door
Dragging their younglings crying from the charge upon the floor

The guardsman stood and could not move, his gun he could not use
He knew the bomb had seconds and not minutes on the fuse
He could not run and pick it up and throw it in the street
There were far too many people there, too many running feet

Take cover! yelled the guardsman, Take cover for your lives
And the Aliens threw down their young and stood before their wives
They turned towards the soldier their eyes alive with fear
For the greater good’s sake, save our children or they'll end their short lives here

The guardsman ran towards the bomb his stomach like a stone
Why was this his battle in the emperors name, why was he alone
He lay down on the package and he murmured one farewell
To those at home in Nimbossa to those he loved so well

He saw the sights of harvest felt the wind upon his brow
The young girls in the munitorum parks, how precious were they now
The soaring of the sw’it the beauty of the swilope
The music of the cheering choir so soon would it be gone

A muffled soft explosion and the room began to quake
The guardsman blown across the floor, his blood a crimson lake
There was no time to cry or shout there was no time to moan
And they turned their children's faces from the blood and from the bones

The crowd outside soon gathered and the chimeras came
To carry off the body of a pawn lost in the game
And the crowd they clapped and cheered and they sang their heretical song
One guardsman less to interfere where he did not belong

And will the young growing up learn at their mothers' knees
The story of the guardsman who bought their lives
Who used his youthful body as a means towards an end
Who gave his life to those who called him murderer not friend

Will Smith: Men In Black[edit]

Here come the Knights in Grey
Imperium's defenders
Here come the Knights in Grey
They won't let you remember

The righteous bear armor of grey, ok
Just in case they have to come and send some Daemons away
The order given to them, Or-do M
Means with ease they will banish them
So do not your eyes avert
Or Chaos with ease will soon convert
The chosen of the Emperor
Number one Daemon purgers
But to our Battle Brothers we don't exist
On our Ordos most classified list
Daemon infestation? to the Emperor pray
Cause you never know when we might save the Day, and..

Here come the Knights in Grey
Imperium's defenders
Here come the Knights in Grey
They won't let you remember

Ozzy Osbourne: Hellraiser[edit]

Im waaaaaghing on an endlis rode
around’ da world ta krump beakies good
sumtiems it ‘eels so tuff
but I still asnt ad enuf
I keep tellin dat its gettin a lot
but I no ize a liar
feelin al rite in da noize n da lite
but dats wut makes me waaaaaaaaaaaaaagh


‘ell raiser, in da funder and ‘eat
‘ell raiser, rock ya bak in ya seet
‘ell raiser, an ize gon make it come troo
‘ell raiser, ize gon do sum weird boy fings to you

Waaaaghin on anuvver world,
Anuvver hive anuvver place
sumtimes I dun feel too gud
ize get dis funny feelin an stuff
da boyz keep sayin dat its not good fer me
but bein a grot dun make it
out of control, I playz da ultimate roll
But dats wut lites my fire

Chorus

Im waaaaaghing on an endlis rode
around’ da world ta krump beakies good
sumtiems it ‘eels so tuff
but I still asnt ad enuf
out of control, I playz da ultimate roll
But dats wut lites my fire
Chorus

Nancy Sinatra: These Boots Were Made For Walking[edit]

You's keep sayin' you's got sumfing for me.
Sumfing you call WAAAGH!, but 'fess up.
You's been muckin' where ya shudn' be muckin'
An' now some uver gitz got all ya swag.

Dese gitz was made fer choppin', an' dats just wot they'll do.
One uv dese days da ladz is gunna stomp all uver you.

You's keep lootin' when you's ought ta be krumpin'
An' you's gots no wins, only beats.
You's stayin' weedy when ya ought ta be 'ard
Now wotz proppa's proppa, an' ya ain' been proppa yet.

Dese gitz was made fer choppin', an' dats just wot they'll do.
One uv dese days da ladz is gunna stomp all uver you.

You's keep sulkin' where ya 'spose ta be loud.
An' you's keep finkin' you's sumfin' speshul.
Ha! Gotz me a brand new Choppa wotz dead killy,
An' I ain' 'ad time fer breakin' it in...

Ready ya gitz? Start choppin'!

Sabaton: Attero Dominatus[edit]

Attero!
Dominatus!
The Hive is burning
Denique!
Interimo!
The Tau has fallen

We stand at the gates of the Hive
With two and a half million men
With six thousand tanks in our ranks
Use them as battering rams

Artillery leading our way
A million grenades has been launched
The xenos must pay for their crimes
The wings of the xeno’s been broken

Commander Chenkov's orders:
Serve me the Hive on a plate!
Disregard the losses
The city is ours to take

The price of a war must be payed
Millions of lives has been lost
The price must be paid by the Tau
That started the war in M.40's

The year of 200.M45
The year when the xenos will fall
We're inside the gates of the Hive
The beaks of the xeno's been broken

Commander Chenkov's orders:
Serve me its head on a plate
Disregard the losses
The xeno's land is ours to take

March!
Fight!
Die!
In the Hive!
March!
Fight!
Conquer!
The Hive!

Sabaton: Wolfpack[edit]

To the sector came the Eldar
Mars and Dictator
leading the convoy west

Took the warp gate in
The long jump back - Convoy to Gryphonne
Mars, Dauntless, Dictator leading
Titans to the forge
And upon the asteroid belt
Lies the silence of the sails
On the dog's watch in the final hour
The corsair fleets appear

On all the auspex it seems quiet and calm
Deep down below the xenos lurks

To the sector came the Eldar
Mars and Dictator
Leading the convoy west
In their own track came the wolfpack
Mars led the convoy
Into the hornet's nest

At the crack of dawn the second watch
Dauntless wracked with flames
Half the convoy hulked or disabled
Heading to Command
But below the fleet ecliptic
Out of sensor range
On the second watch in the final hour
The corsair fleets return

The Eldar come in for a second time
To make the Monkeigh face their fate

To the sector came the Eldar
Mars and Dictator
Leading the convoy west
In their own track came the wolfpack
Mars led the convoy
Into the hornet's nest

Lances blazing, fighters failing
M42 when
The Navy did fail the test
To the sector came the Eldar
Mars and Dictator
Leading them into death

Asuryan makes the contact and lead them
Isha's Tears scores a kill in the dark
She Who Thirsts sinking 4 in 2 approaches
Fading Star cut in half by a lance

Sabaton: Panzerkampf (Chaos Edition)[edit]

Into the Imperial Land the Chaotic Army March

In Segmentum Obscuros, Millennium 43
Tanks line up in thousands, as far the eye can see
Ready for the onslaught, ready for the Fight
Waiting for the Imperials, to march into the trap

Traps were placed in darkness, in the cover of the night
Waiting to be trigged, when the time is right
In the imagination imminent attack
Once the battle started there was no turning back

The end of the Imperium draws near
It’s time has come to an end
The end of an era is near
It’s time, to attack

Into Imperial land the chaotic army march
Brothers side by side to stop the Imperial charge
Titans on cadian soil a thundering release
One billion man of war the chaotic wrath unleash

Fields of western Cadia were the heat of battle burned
Suffered heavy losses the tie of war was turned
Driving back the Imperials, fighting on all fronts
Out of the Cadian sector, out of chaotic land

Reinforce the frontlines cause the imperials to retreat
Send in all reserves securing their defeat
Believers of the Dark Gods, broke the citadel
Ruins of a planet, Imperials rest in hell

The end of the Imperium draws near
It’s time has come to an end
The end of an era is near
It’s time, to attack

Into Imperial land the chaotic army march
Brothers side by side to stop the Imperial charge
Titans on cadian soil a thundering Release
One billion man of war the chaotic wrath unleash

ONWARD BROTHERS, AMRIES OF THE DARK GODS CHARGE

Oh, Lord Abbadon, conqueror of lands
Will of the Dark Gods, strongly they command
Oh, Lord Abbadon, conqueror of lands
Finally victorious the chaotic army stands

The end of the Imperium draws near
It’s time has come to an end
The end of an era is near
It’s time, to attack

Into Imperial land the chaotic army march
Brothers side by side to stop the Imperial charge
Titans on cadian soil a thundering Release
One billion man of war the chaotic wrath unleash


Sabaton: Panzerkampf[edit]

Into the Imperium the Ork WARGHHH March!

In the Imperium of Mankind, Millennium 41'st
Tanks line up in millions, as far the eye can see.
Ready for the onslaught, ready for the fight.
Waiting for the xenos, to march into the trap.

Mines are placed in darkness.
In the cover of the night.
Waiting to be triggered.
When the time is right.

Imminent invasion.
Imminent attack.
Once the battle's started.
There's no turning back.

The end of the Ork WARGHHH draws near.
Its time has come to an end.
The end of an era is here.
It's time to attack.

Into the Imperium the Ork WARGHH march!
Guardsmen, stand side by side, to stop the xeno charge.
Gargants on Human soil Thunder in the west.
Twelve billion Guardsmen at war, Imperial wrath unleashed.

Fields of Armegeddon, feel the heat of battle burned.
Suffered heavy losses, the tide of war has turned.
Driving back the greenskins, fighting on four fronts.
Drive them Off of Imperium, out of Human land.
Reinforce the frontline, force the xenos to retreat.
Send in all the reserves, securing their defeat.
Guardsmen of Imperium broke the invasion.
Ruins of an army, greenskins rest in hell!"

The end of the Ork WARGHHH draws near.
Its time has come to an end.
The end of an era is near.
It's time to attack.

Into the Imperium the Ork WARGHH march!
Guardsmen, stand side by side, to stop the xeno charge.
Gargants on Human soil Thunder in the west.
Twelve billion Guardsmen at war, Imperial wrath unleashed.

Oh, Imperium of Mankind, union of worlds.
Will of the people, strong in command.
Oh, God Emperor, protector of Man.
Once more victorious, the Imperial Guard stands.

The end of the Ork WARGHHH draws near.
Its time has come to an end.
The end of an era is here.
It's time to attack.

Into the Imperium the Ork WARGHH march!
Guardsmen, stand side by side, to stop the xeno charge.
Gargants on Human soil Thunder in the west.
Twelve billion Guardsmen at war, Imperial wrath unleashed.

Sabaton: Primo Victoria[edit]

Through the storms of warp
As we go to the Emperor's side
Through the Xeno lines
Mankind Victorious!

We've been training for weeks
But we're still ready to strike
As the great Imperium will win
We're the first wave on planet
We're the first ones to fall
No soldiers drop landed before

In the dawn of war they will pay
With their lives as the price
Legends are written today
In this burning inferno
Know that nothing remains
As our flamers light up the Tau

Aiming for killshots though using a las
Victory is ours with melta and plas'!

Through the storms of warp
As we go to the Emperor's side
Through the Xeno lines
Mankind Victorious!

On a Xeno Planet
In the Ultima Segmentum
Near the Tau Empire
Doom is upon them

We've been here before
Used to this kind of war
Pulse fire goes over the trench
Our order's are easy
It's kill or be blammed
The Commissars shoot those who fail

In the dawn of war they will pay
With their lives as the price
Legends are written today
Now we're invading
The Tau worlds again
This time we know what will come

Aiming for killshots though using a las
Victory is our with melta and plas'!

Through the storms of warp
As we go to the Emperor's side
Through the Xeno lines
Mankind Victorious!

On a Xeno Planet
In the Ultima Segmentum
Near the Tau Empire
Doom is upon them

On a Xeno World
Bathed with their gore
Baneblades are turning the war
Valkyries
Soar to victory
Planetstrike

Aiming for killshots though using a las
Victory is our with melta and plas'!

Through the storms of warp
As we go to the Emperor's side
Through the Xeno lines
Mankind Victorious!

On a Xeno Planet
In the Ultima Segmentum
Near the Tau Empire
Doom is upon them

Through the storms of warp
As we go to the Emperor's side
Through the Xeno lines
Mankind Victorious!

On a Xeno Planet
In the Ultima Segmentum
Near the Tau Empire
Doom is upon them

Edgar Allen Poe: The Raven[edit]

Once upon a battlefield dreary, where I cowered, spent and bleary,
Within an Imperial bunker, darkly stained with dust and gore -
As I cowered, nearly shuttering, suddenly there came a sputtering
As some weapon quickly stuttering - firing at my bunker door.
"`Tis some bolter", I murmured, "firing at my bunker door -
Only this and nothing more."

Ah, distinctly I remember, it was in the bleak December,
And the brightly burning bastions lit the horizon by the score.
Eagerly, on freedom drunker; - vainly had I sought to hunker
In this heavy Imperial bunker - with perhaps a tunnel in the floor -
A safe and empty fortress with perhaps a tiny tunnel in the floor -
Only this and nothing more.

And the mad raving howling of each distant Space Wolf prowling
Thrilled me - filled me with fantastic terrors never felt before.
So that now, to the beating of my heart, I stood entreating
"`Tis some Space Wolf there repeating, firing at my bunker door -
Some common Grey Hunter rapid-firing at my bunker door -
This it is and nothing more."

Presently my soul grew stronger; hesitating then no longer
"Marine," said I, "or Scout, your attention I implore;
The bunker walls are thick - they are made of tempered brick
And your bolters do not nick the slightest scratch or tiny score -
Not a dimple, dent, depression, dip, scratch or tiny score -
Away now, and fire no more."

Then in the bunker slumping, presently I heard a thumping
A pounding - rattling many times fiercer than before.
And soon I began to screech - the bunker wall grenades did breach;
The very gods I did beseech as the ceiling fell upon the floor -
Through the wounds poured light which danced upon the floor -
Danced amidst the sounds of war.

Then at once it stopped the violence - I was left alone with silence
Confused, I spied the reason why the shells did drop no more -
For as I began to shutter, then with many a flit and flutter
A psyber-Raven flew through the clutter to perch above the door -
Perched on the two-headed eagle just above the bunker door -
Perched and sat and nothing more.

At this I grew more craven, for the talons of the psyber-Raven
Were all over covered with bright red blood and crimson gore.
"Wretch!" I cried, "Njal hath lent thee - into this fortress has he sent thee
So that remotely may he here be - and this bunker then explore -
Scry out my exact location and this bunker then explore -"

Quoth the Raven, "Eversor"

Then, methought, the air grew darker, the bunker now a little starker
For the uttered word brought terror as I had never felt before.
As for weapons, I knew I had none - no bolter, sword or lasgun;
No arms to stop the war's son fated to break soon through the door -
The blood-mad crazed assassin fated to break soon through the door-
Quoth the Raven, "Eversor"

"Be that word our sign of parting, machine or bird!" I shrieked, upstarting -
"Get thee back into the fire-fight and here spy on me no more!
For as you came unbidden - I would otherwise be here hidden -
Leave my location in this midden - quit that icon above my door!
Take thy shining metal eye, and take thy form from off my door!"
Quoth the Raven, "Eversor"

And the Raven, never flitting, still is sitting - still is sitting
On the pallid two-headed eagle just above the bunker door;
His metal eye has all the seeming of a psyker that is scheming,
To have my guts lie steaming in a pile upon the floor;
And now all hope has left me, crouched here upon the floor
I await the Eversor!

Henry the Fifth, Act III Scene I[edit]

Once more unto the boards, Anon, once more,
Or close the wall up with our Neckbeard dead!
In-game there's nothing so becomes a man
As massive fatness and huge faggotry;
But when the /b/last of war brings in the cancer,
Then imitate the action of the fatguy;
Quote from the rulebooks, summon up the fluff,
Disguise fat nature with hard-favour'd RAAAAGE;
Then lend the one a terrible aspect;
Let it stare until PCs are all dead
Like the foul bodak; let the brow o'erwhelm it
As fearfully as does a tiefling’s horn
Add two charisma to his contorted face,
Swirl'd in the wild and wasteful fourth-ed.
Now roll the bones and sketch the portraits wide,
Dream hard of breasts, that bend up every ‘spirit’
To his full height. On, on, you beardyest fatguys,
Whose blood is fet from fathers of thin-proof!
Fathers that, like so many useless tripfags,
Have in these parts from morn till even raged,
And saged their threads for lack of argument.
Fap not to your mothers; now attest
That those whom you call'd fatguys did beget you.
Be copy now to men of better games,
And show them how you roll. And you, warmachine,
Whose limbs are made of pewter, show us here
The metal of your minis; let us swear
That they are worth their pricetag, which I doubt much;
For I see most of you so mean and base,
That hath not showered since last Petertide.
I see you field warhounds in Apocalypse,
Standing upon their foes. The game's been lost!
Follow your spirits, and upon this board
Cry, "Rage at Vampire! Magic! And Fourth Ed!"

Nirvana: Smells Like Teen Spirit[edit]

Load up da trukks

Bring yer boyz

`Kuz we's haulin'

Out all da toyz

Da `oomies run

Frum dakka gunz

I knows I knows

We's number one

ELLO ELLO ELLO ELLO

ELLO ELLO ELLO ELLO

ELLO ELLO ELLO ELLO

ELLO ELLO ELLO-

Oomies can't `urt us wit' flamers

`Ere we go now

Orky raidaz

I squish pinkies wit' my anus

`Ere we go now

Orky raidaz

Cuz its choppy

Cuz its bashy

Cuz its dakka

Cuz we's sneaky

YA

Winnin' is what Orks do best

`Cause by Mork we's all been bless'd

Our mighty WAAAAAAAGH `as always been

And always will until the end

ELLO ELLO ELLO ELLO

ELLO ELLO ELLO ELLO

ELLO ELLO ELLO ELLO

ELLO ELLO ELLO-

Oomies can't `urt us wit' flamers

`Ere we go now

Orky raidaz

Now I'm out dere, smashin' faces

`Ere we go now

Orky raidaz

Cuz its choppy

Cuz its bashy

Cuz its dakka

Cuz we's sneaky

YA


And I forgitz

Just wot it was

Oh ya, I think a melta bomb

I found it dere

It's tikkin' now

Oh well, I'll toss it at doze grots.

ELLO ELLO ELLO ELLO

ELLO ELLO ELLO ELLO

ELLO ELLO ELLO ELLO

ELLO ELLO ELLO-

Oomies can't `urt us wit' flamers

`Ere we go now

Orky raidaz

I'm outta words, so I's WAAAAAAAAAAGH!

`Ere we go now

Orky raidaz

Cuz its choppy

Cuz its bashy

Cuz its dakka

Cuz we's sneaky

CUZ IT'S A WAAAAAAAAAGH!

CUZ IT'S A WAAAAAAAAAAGH!

CUZ IT'S A WAAAAAAAAAAAGH!

CUZ IT'S A WAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!

CUZ IT'S A WAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!


Sailor Tau[edit]

Fire caste by moonlight
Water caste by daylight
Never running from a real fight
She is the one named Sailor Tau
She will...never turn her back on a friend
She is... always there to defend
She is...the one on whom we can depend
She is the one named Sailor.....
.... Sailor Broadside
.... Sailor Stealth
.... Sailor Crisis
..... Sailor Drone
With cosmic secrets
All so new to her
She is the one named Sailor Tau
fire caste by moonlight
Water caste by daylight
With her Sailor Shas'o to help fight
She is the one named Sailor Tau
She is the one named Sailor Tau
She is the one . . . Sailor Tau!!

Coolio: Gangsta's Paradise[edit]

As I browse through the minis of my local games store
I took a look at my life and realized I’m very poor
But that's just perfect for an fa/tg/uy like me
You know, I bought that space marine battle company
At 4:30 in the morning dice are rolling
PCs are dying the whole session railroading... fools
And I've been plannin' and ragin’ so long that
Even my mother thinks that my mind is gone
I'm a man of the die, I've passed my knowledge check
Got a codex in my hand and a beard on my neck
But if I finish all my painting and if you get Matt
Then tonight I am putting on my wizard robes and hat.

We been spending most our lives
Living in an fa/tg/uy paradise
I've done FATAL once or twice
Living in an fa/tg/uy paradise
It's hard work in rolling dice
Living in an fa/tg/uy paradise
We buy minis at high price
Living in an fa/tg/uy paradise

A local boy made a Mary Sue last week
I just approved it and saved my mad critique
I really don’t mind, I didn’t even rage
‘cause I dumped the Lady of Pain on him, flaying his mage.
But I ain't never punched weeaboos even if they deserved it
A fa/tg/uy with a tool? You know that’s unheard of
I’m obese and smelly but have the best army
And my homies agree, it did win the tourney...fools
If you’re here for stories, you'll be wrecked in tears
We have C.S Goto raping well known canon with shears
But we ain't really quaint, so please don't point and stare
We are just autistically impaired

There's chainfists, chainswords, and lightning claws
In our life hobby
Like Cthulhu Mythos
It's as grim an’ dark as can be

We been spending most our lives
Living in an fa/tg/uy paradise
We're just fat and nerdy guys
Living in an fa/tg/uy paradise
There's no greater sin and vice
Living in an fa/tg/uy paradise
We all fight, by rolling dice
Living in an fa/tg/uy paradise

Hitchin' up a game group, churnin' out new content
Made a game on Sunday, soon I'll make another
Think you’re pimp at rollplay? Think you can roleplay?
I know I’m a million times more playa then you gay frey
I'm the neckbeard guy the young Gygaxes wanna be like
In the store day and night rollin’ paragon mad soulknife
So don't be vain and don't be whiny
Or else, weeaboo, I might declare Exterminatus on your army

We been spending most our lives
Living in an fa/tg/uy paradise
We’re all crazy max/min-ites
Living in an fa/tg/uy paradise
We all dare to fantasize
Living in an fa/tg/uy paradise
We’re all virgins who roll dice
Living in an fa/tg/uy paradise

Blue Oyster Cult: Black Blade[edit]

I was on a mission to fight for the Greater Good
But this here Dawn Blade at my side don't act the way it should
Keeps calling me it's Shas'O when I feel more like it's Gue'la
And it keeps dragging me faster and faster to an early grave, yeah
And it howls! It howls like hell!

I'm told it's my duty to fight against them all
That warring is my trade and I was born to wade through gore
I just want to be a lover, not a blue-skinned screaming ghoul
I wish it'd picked another to be it's killing tool

Dawn Blade, Dawn Blade
Forged a million years ago
Dawn Blade, Dawn Blade
Killing so it's power can grow

It's death from the beginning to the end of time
And I'm the Tau's champion, or is that just part of it's grand designs?
And whole worlds are dying, and the burden's mine
And the Dawn Blade keeps on killing, 'til the end of time

Dawn Blade, Dawn Blade
Bringing chaos to the world we know
Dawn Blade, Dawn Blade
And it's using me to kill my friends
Dawn Blade, Dawn Blade
Growing stronger so the galaxy will end
Forcing my mind to bend and bend

I am the Dawn Blade
Forged a million billion years ago
My cosmic soul goes on for eternity
Carving out destiny
Bringing in the Lords of Chaos
Bringing up the Beasts of the Immaterium
Sucking out the souls of heroes
Laying waste to the Imperium
My master is my slave
Hahaahahahahahahahaha!
You poor fucking Tau

'Twas The Night Before Emperor's Day[edit]

'Twas the night before Emperor's Day,
and he fought all alone,
in a four foot deep trench
lined with plasteel and stone.

I was traveling the warp
with gifts for the land,
when I saw this lone guardsman
making his brave stand.

I looked all about,
I looked near and far,
no Chimera, no Basilisk,
nor Techpriest or Commissar.

No Sergeant yelled orders
to this guardsman - no backing
to fight this ridge full of xeno
formed from pure evil, attacking.

His armor in tatters,
his eyes nearly blind,
A sobering truth
raced through my mind.

His position was doomed,
was my only thought
and this soldier's brave stand
would all be for naught.

The guardsman stared unblinking,
silent and alone,
his lasrifle at the ready
against his shoulder bone.

His gaze was so calm
in the face of calamity,
the perfect picture of
a guardsman of humanity.

Who was this brave hero
whose position I'd spied,
warring against
this unstoppable tide?

I now knew that all humans
I would see this night,
owed their lives to these guardsmen
who were willing to fight.

Soon all round the galaxy
the children would play,
and grownups would praise
the bright Emperor's Day.

They all lived their lives
every month of the year,
Because of brave guardsmen
like the one standing here.

A tear came to my eye
for those who stood alone,
on a cold Emperor's Day Eve
on a planet far from home.

Their great sacrifices
I could never betray
So I drew my burning sword
to join in the fray

The soldier did turn
and I heard a rough voice.
"My Emperor, rest easy,
this death is my choice;

I fight for a freedom
that may never be found,
but not ever shall I waver
on Your sacred ground."

Then the Guardsman turned
to face the incursions
of the foul xenos and
their unholy perversions

I kept watch for hours,
until the night was still
and the guardsman lay broken
on the bloody red hill.

I could not just leave
on that cold grim dark night,
this guardian of honor
so willing to fight.

And as the guardsman lay dying,
his soul strong and pure,
he cried, "Ave Imperator!
It's Emperor's Day! This world is secure!"

I kneeled before the fallen,
A great victory he'd won.
"Happy Emperor's Day my guardsman,
rest in peace, my son."

Daniel Decateur Emmett: Dixie Land[edit]

No one knows how this all started
But it don't surprise us empty-hearted-
Get Away! Get Away! Get Away, xenos scum!

When those came up in that ole half-track
We found the nerve to now push back!
Get Away! Get Away! Get Away, xenos scum!

Advance the flag there trooper! Hoorah! Hoorah!
On far off lands we'll take our stand-
And not die bloody cowards!

To arms! To arms! And purge the fuckin' xenos!
To arms! To arms! And purge the fuckin' xenos!

Now John Fuklaw was an awesome sight,
And rallied us into the fight!
To arms! To arms! To arms! Fire away!

And Raepfist cut a bloody swathe
and Conrad Raege had to laugh and scoff
Push on! Push on! Push on! Valiant men.

Bring up that flamer trooper! Hoorah! Hoorah!
Let's give 'em hell, and then die well!
In service to the Emprah!

Advance! Advance! They're no match for us trooper!
Advance! Advance! Ave Imperator!

OH I love to serve the Emprah! Hoorah! HOORAH!
On his holy land I'll take my stand-
To fight on for the Emprah!

Hoorah! Hoorah! Praise be to Holy Terra!
Hoorah! Hoorah! Praise the Immoooooooortal Emprah!

Trey Parker: Everyone Has Aids (Team America: World Police)[edit]

Everyone has WARP WARP! WARP! WARP! WARP WARP WARP WARP, WARP WARP! Everyone has WARP!

And so this is the end of our story And everyone is dead from WARP. It took from me my favorite son My only true Warmaster My conqueror of bright stars (He got WARPed)

Well I'm gonna march on Terra! Lead the Astartes and charge the brigades! There's a Daemon inside of all of us... I'll make them see, everyone has WARP.

My Commissar! (WARP!) My Astropath! (WARP!) My Chaplain and Librarian and Captain! (WARP! WARP! WARP!) The Xenos and witch, and the mutant and psyker!

Everyone has WARP! My techpriest and my squig Old Blue WARP! WARP! WARP! The Primarch's got it and so do you! WARP WARP WARP WARP, WARP WARP! Come on everybody we got purgin' to do! It's time to exterminate these worlds everyone has WARP! WARP! WARP! WARP! WARP! WARP! WARP! WARP! WARP! WARP! WARP! WARP! WARP! WARP! WARP! WARP! WARP! WARP! WARP! WARP! (WARP!)


Don McLean: American Pie[edit]

A long, long time ago...
I can still remember
How that cultist used to make me smile.

And I knew if I had my chance
That I could make those xenos dance
And, maybe, they’d be purged for a while.

But February made me shiver
With every bolt round I’d deliver. Heresy on the doorstep,
I couldn’t take one more step.

I can’t remember if I wrrryed
When I read about his lolcron bride,
But something touched me deep inside
The day the music died.

So die die, from the flames in the sky,
Drove my raider to the crater,
But the crater was dry.
And them good old dreads were drainin' the promethium dry
Singin’, "This’ll be the day that I die.
"This’ll be the day that I die."


Did you write the litanies of hate,
And do you live in the EMPRAH'S faith,
If the Codex tells you so?
Do you believe in rock ’n roll,
Can crack cocaine save your heretic soul,
And can you teach me how to wrrrry real slow?

Well, I know that you’re in love with him
`cause I saw you dancin’ in the gym.
You both kicked off your boots.
Man, I dig those rhythmic blues.

I was a lonely teenaged scout marine
With a camo cloak colored brown and green
I knew to see but not be seen
The day the music died.
I started singin’,

"Die die, from the flames in the sky."
Drove my raider to the crater,
But the crater was dry.
And them good old dreads were drainin' the promethium dry
Singin’, "This’ll be the day that I die.
"This’ll be the day that I die."

Now since M.30 we’ve been on our own
And heresy grows fat on a rollin’ stone,
But that’s not how it used to be.
When the harlequin sang with the noise marine,
In a coat he borrowed from James Dean
And a voice that came from you and me,

Oh, and while Lord Tzeentch was looking down,
A loota boy stole his JUST AS PLANNED crown.
The classroom was adjourned;
No grade report was returned.
And while Kharn raged about METAL BOX,
Macha tried to get some in the park,
And we rolled sixes in the dark
The day the music died.
We were singing,

"Die die, from the flames in the sky."
Drove my raider to the crater,
But the crater was dry.
And them good old dreads were drainin' the promethium dry
Singin’, "This’ll be the day that I die.
"This’ll be the day that I die."

Helter skelter in a summer swelter,
The birds flew off the Exterminatus shelter
Eight miles high and falling fast.
Nurgle-tan let loose a cloud of gas.
Macha still couldn't get no ass,
With old Failbaddon in a cast.

Now Cultist-chan wore cheap perfume
While Doomrider played a Slaaneshi tune.
We all got up to dance,
Oh, but we never got the chance!
The Angry Marines tried to take the field;
The Emperors Children refused to yield.
Do you recall what was revealed The day the music died?

We started singing,
"Die die, from the flames in the sky."
Drove my raider to the crater,
But the crater was dry.
Them good old dreads were drainin' the promethium dry
And singin’, "This’ll be the day that I die.
"This’ll be the day that I die."

Oh, and there we were all in one place,
All GRIMDARK and lost in space,
With no time left to start again.
So come on: Jack be nimble, Jack be quick!
Candlejack sat on a can-
Cause fire is the devil’s only friend.

Oh, and as I watched him on the stage
My hands were clenched in fists of rage.
No angel born in hell
Could break that daemon’s spell.
And as I purged her in the night
To show her the emperors shining light,
I saw Eldrad laughing with delight
The day the music died.

He was singing,
"Die die, from the flames in the sky."
Drove my raider to the crater,
But the crater was dry.
Them good old dreads were drainin' the promethium dry
And singin’, "This’ll be the day that I die.
"This’ll be the day that I die."

I met a farseer whose love did bloom
And I asked her for some happy news,
But she just smiled and turned away.
I went down to the wargear store
Where I’d heard the music years before,
But the techpriests said the music wouldn’t play.

Hand een thee stweets: thee childwen scweamed,
Thee lovers cwied, and thee poeets dweamed.
But not a hword hwas spoken;
Thee chyurch bells all were broken.
Hand thee thwee men Ay hadmire most:
Thee father, son, hand thee holy ghost,
They captyoored thee lhast train fooor thee coast
Thee day thee myoosick died.

And they were singing,

"Die die, from the flames in the sky."
Drove my raider to the crater,
But the crater was dry.
And them good old dreads were drainin' the promethium dry
Singin’, "This’ll be the day that I die.
"This’ll be the day that I die."

"Die die, from the flames in the sky."
Drove my raider to the crater,
But the crater was dry.
And them good old dreads were drainin' the promethium dry
Singin’, "This’ll be the day that I die.
"This’ll be the day that I die."


Theme from Mighty Morphin Power Rangers[edit]

[Immortal God-Emperor of Mankind]: "Inquisitor! Heretics, Xenos, and Mutants are abound! Recruit a team of Acolytes with attitude!"
[Inquisitor]: "Ayayayayay!"

They've got, a power and a faith that you've never seen before!
They've got, the ability to smite and to even up the score!
No Grot, can ever take them down! The Emprah lies on their side!
Go go Emprah's Rangers! Go go Emprah's Rangers! Go go Emprah's Rangers! The Mighty Inquisiting Emprah's Rangers!

They know, the fate of Holy Terra's lying in their hands!
They know, to always use their weapons at the first chance!
No Cult will ever take them down! The Emprah lies on their side!
Go go Emprah's Rangers! Go go Emprah's Rangers! Go go Emprah's Rangers! The Mighty Inquisiting Emprah's Rangers!

The Unclean, can never take them down! The Emprah lies on their side!
Go go Emprah's Rangers! Go go Emprah's Rangers! Go go Emprah's Rangers! The Mighty Inquisiting Emprah's Rangers!
Go go Emprah's Rangers!
Go go Emprah's Rangers!
Go go Emprah's Rangers!


"And the band played 'Fight on, the Navy'(And the Band Played 'Waltzing Matilda')"[edit]

When I was a young man I flew in a ship,
And lived the free life of a scouter.
From the Twin Star of Aphor to the Aquila Rift,
I danced my old scoutship all over.
Then in nought-oh-fifteen, the Emp-ror said "Son,
It's time time to stop scoutin', there's work to be done."
So they gave me a rank bar,
A Cruiser, a gun,
And they sent me away to the War.

And the band played 'Fight on, the Navy'
As we boarded the Santa Maree,
And amidst all the cheers,
the cannonade and tears,
we left for Bellerophon III.

How well I remember the sight I saw then,
the proud Navy cut down and shattered.
And how in the hell that they called Lagrange Ten,
We were butchered like poor bloody cattle.
Old Boney was ready, he'd primed himself well,
he cut us with Lances, and broke us with shell.
And in five minutes flat,
he had blown us to hell,
nearly blew me right back to Agrippa.

And the Vox played 'Fight on, the Navy',
as we formed up and counted the slain.
We'd lost half of ours,
for a handful of theirs,
but we charged right on back in again.

Now us that were left, well, we tried to survive,
in a mad world of lanceshot and boarders.
And for nine minutes ten I kept my boys alive,
as around me our numbers grew lesser.
Then a whole mess of guardsmen stormed onto the bridge,
they shot down old Kelley, the Nav and the Kid,
and for some bloody reason, they just let me live.
Never knew there were worse things than dying.

For I'll do no more dancing my scouter,
I thought as I ran for the pod,
for a scout can't feel dread,
he's got more balls than head,
and that's one thing a coward ain't got.

The handful of pods left I gathered to me,
and we left like a bolt from a barrel.
A dozen survivors of two-million-odd men,
the Grand Fleet of Admiral Karil.
And as we all dove into Catan's dock ring,
and the three from the Mada all started to sing,
the thought of my men,
had a horrible sting,
for not one had lived through the battle.

And the band played 'Fight on , the Navy',
for the wives of the men of Catan,
Nobody cheered,
they just saw us and stared,
and then, the crying began.

And now every march day I sit in the crowd,
and watch the young guardsmen walk on then.
I wonder to myself, not speaking aloud,
why there's not one vet'ran with them.
The young men march stiffly, all upright with pride,
they're all brave young soldiers with nothing to hide.
And then one kid asks,
"Is that how daddy died?"
And I don't have the courage to tell him.

And the band plays 'Fight on, the Navy',
As I answer my question before.
If the march they could give,
to the men who had lived,
not one man would dare march at all.

Dancin' my scouter, dancin' my scouter,
who'll come a-dancin' my scouter with me?
And their ghosts may be heard as you dance on by Bellerophon,
who'll come a-dancin' my scouter with me?

Gilbert and Sullivan: A British Tar[edit]

A Space Marine is a soaring soul,
Far greater than a mortal man,
His energetic fist should be ready to resist
Any heretical plan.
His nose should pant,
and his lip should curl,
His cheeks should flame,
and his brow should furl,
His bosom should heave,
and his hearts should glow,
And his fist be ever ready for a knock-down blow.

His nose should pant and his lip should curl,
His cheeks should flame and his brow should furl,
His bosom should heave and his hearts should glow,
And his fist be ever ready for a knock-down blow.

His eyes should flash with an inborn fire,
His brow with scorn be wrung;
He never should bow down to a filthy xenos frown,
Or the tang of a traitor tongue.

His foot should stamp,
and his throat should growl,
His sword should twirl,
and his face should scowl,
His eyes should flash like a conqueror
And he should ever bellow "for the Emperor!"

His foot should stamp, and his throat should growl,
His sword should twirl, and his face should scowl;
His eyes should flash like a conqueror,
And he should ever bellow "for the Emperor!", the Emperor, the Emperor, the Emperor!

Dio: Holy Diver[edit]

Holy Bolter
You've been out too long in the warzone
Oh it's jamming again

Ride the Tank
You can see its hull but you know it's clean.
Oh don't you see what I mean

Gotta shoot 'em down
Holy Bolter

Shiny Tracers
Like the eyes of a Daemon in the night
Something is coming for you

Race for the Dropship
You can hide in the sun of the Emperor's light
Oh we will pray it's all right

Gotta get away-get away
Between the armor lies
There's a trooper hard as steel
The valor never dies
War's a never ending wheel

Holy Bolter
You're the star of the battlefield
No need for full auto

Jump on the Tank you can feel its hull but you know it's mean
Some might can never be seen yeah
Holy Bolter
You've been out too long in the warzone
Oh it's jamming again

Ride the Tank
You can see armor but you know it's clean.

Gotta get away-get away Gotta get away-get away
Holy Bolter sole survivor your honour's clean

Holy Bolter Holy bolter never change the mag Holy Bolter
Oh Holy Bolter yeah alright get away get away get away

Holy Bolter Holy Bolter whoa Holy Bolter Hmmm Hmmm Hmmm Hmmm.

Will Smith: Fresh Prince of Bel-Air[edit]

Now, this is a story all about how
My life got flipped-turned upside down
And I'd like to take a minute
Just sit by my skull throne
I'll tell you how I became the daemon prince of Khorne

No idea where I was born or raised
On the gladiator arenas was where I spent most of my days
Beatin' smashing' killin' in the arenas
Escaped to the mountains with a few cronies
When a couple of soldiers
Who were up to no good
They found us and attacked my neighborhood
I got in one little fight and Emperor started to worry
And said 'You're movin' with your father and god in Terra'

It kinda hurt to see my pals fucked
But Emprah didn't let me go back
He gave me a battleship and then he gave me my legion.
I put my axe on and said, 'Gotta give my army a lesson'.

First company, yo this is bad
Marines drinking juice out of a champagne glass.
Is this what the marines of World Eaters are like?
Hmmmmm this won't be alright.

But wait I hear there're techmarine, apothecarians and all that
Put implants to the recruits like ones in this cool cat
Now I like it
Badass bloodthirsty soldiers
I don't give a fuck to Emprahs' warnings

Well, the battle-barge landed and when I came out
There was Horus who told he's gonna throw a rout
I was in and we went to Terra
We went totally ape
After an epic bloodshed I heard 'Horus got raped'

I whistled for a Battle-Barge and when it came near
My legion ran in, cursing the Emperor
Dumped Kharn to the trunk and fled the war
Khorne told me 'Yo homes to Eye of Terror'

I got wings on my back and horns on my head
This cool runesword and skin blood-red
I looked at my kingdom
I was finally there
To sit on my throne as the Daemon Prince of Khorne

Sabaton: Stalingrad[edit]

Fresh from orbit
From the dropships came to Comrades aid
City in despair
Almost crushed by Ghazkulls army

Oh its grimmer than hell
Ghazkull's forces advancing

The sound of the stubbers
The music of death
A grand symphony

See your friends fall
Hear them pray to the gods
Your emperor denies

Every man dies alone
And when your time comes
You will know that its time

Yarrick's fortress on fire
Is this madness or hell

The sound of the stubbers
The music of death
We're playing Chaos's symphony
Violins as lasguns
Conducted from hell

Oh Hades Hive
Morte Vedae

Are you praying
Do you follow the Commissars lead
No one knows you
No one cares but a single violin

Play the score of the dead
Know the daemon within

The sound of the stubbers
The music of death
We're playing Chaos's symphony
Violins as lasguns
Conducted from hell

Henry Clay Work: Marching Through Georgia[edit]

Bring the platoon standard, lads, we'll sing another song
Sing it with a spirit that will start this world along.
Sing it as we'll always sing it, quadrillions strong,
As we fight for the Emprah!

Hoorah! Hoorah! We march with his glory.
Hoorah! Hoorah! His light shall make you free.
So we'll carry his name from Agrip'naa to Delphi,
As we fight for the Emprah!

How the xenos howl when our flamers end all their fun,
How the cultists scream out when they march into our guns,
How the foe cries out for mercy when there will be none,
As we fight for the Emprah!

Hoorah! Hoorah! We march with his glory.
Hoorah! Hoorah! His light shall make you free.
So we'll carry his name from Agrip'naa to Delphi,
As we fight for the Emprah!

Yes, and there were heretics who wept with painful tears
having felt our noble will they had denied for years.
How the Inquisition now brings them justice so dear,
As we fight for the Emprah!

Hoorah! Hoorah! We march with his glory.
Hoorah! Hoorah! His light shall make you free.
So we'll carry his name from Agrip'naa to Delphi,
As we fight for the Emprah!

Your Imperium will die under my great onslaught!
So that Failbaddon said and that is what he thought,
But indeed we shall triumph for arms he has forgot,
As we fight for the Emprah!

Hoorah! Hoorah! We march with his glory.
Hoorah! Hoorah! His light shall make you free.
So we'll carry his name from Agrip'naa to Delphi,
As we fight for the Emprah!

So we fight at Creed's right hand and Cadia shall hold,
For the Emprah stands with us and all rebels shall fold,
And we can hide Titans behind barricades we're told,
As we fight for the Emprah!

Hoorah! Hoorah! We march with his glory.
Hoorah! Hoorah! His light shall make you free.
So we'll carry his name from Agrip'naa to Delphi,
As we fight for the Emprah!

Kelis: Milkshake[edit]

[Repeat x2]
My mechadendrites bring all the boys to the yard,
And they're like,
The best forge world's Mars!
Damn right the best forge world's Mars!
We can teach you,
'Bout St. Tesla's electric charge.

I know you want xenotech,
The thing that makes free energy,
What explorators go crazy for.
They lose their minds
If the warp unbinds
Before they get out in time.

[Chorus x2]
La la-la la la,
Warm it up.
La la-la la la,
AdMech toys are waiting.

My mechadendrites bring all the boys to the yard,
And they're like,
The best forge world's Mars!
Damn right the best forge world's Mars!
We can teach you,
'Bout St. Tesla's electric charge.

I can see the machine spirit.
You want to be just some skitarii?
Tech geeks and freaks with toys
That can't be bought.
Just know: heretics get caught.
Watch out if you're smart,

[Chorus x2]
La la-la la la,
Warm it up.
La la-la la la,
AdMech toys are waiting.

My mechadendrites bring all the boys to the yard,
And they're like,
The best forge world's Mars!
Damn right the best forge world's Mars!
We can teach you,
'Bout St. Tesla's electric charge.

Omnissiah says "get involved."
Enginseers practice every day so
You must maintain your firearm.
Same time maintain your iron halo
And you will learn to mend.
(Plus work on our titans!)
Then next honour spark plugs, the wheel and flint.
Then starting your car is a blessed event!

[Chorus x2] La la-la la la,
Warm it up.
La la-la la la,
AdMech toys are waiting.

My mechadendrites bring all the boys to the yard,
And they're like,
The best forge world's Mars!
Damn right the best forge world's Mars!
We can teach you,
'Bout St. Tesla's electric charge.

The Lonely Island: I'm On A Boat[edit]

I'm in a dread.
I'm in a dread.
Everybody start running
Cause I'm charging in a dread.
I'm in a dread.
I'm in a dread.
Take a good hard look
at the motherfucking dread.

I'm in a dread, motherfuckers, so you better run.
In a dread, blastin' you away with my giant gun.
Bustin' heretics, making 'em wish they were dead.
You can't stop me, motherfuckers 'cause I'm in a dread.

Take your shot, bitch,
I'm in a dread, witch.
And my adamantium armour's so thick.
I've got my giant fists
And my meltagun.
You were already dead before the war begun.

I'm riding in a drop pod
Falling to the ground
The drop pod's arriving,
Making a terrible sound.
But this ain't Slaanesh
This is the Emperor's hound,
An airborne dreadnought, motherfucking, coming inbound.

Fuck you, I'm in a dread, motherfuckers.
Fuck guns, I cheated death, motherfuckers.
I'm here with Chapter Master Seth, motherfuckers.
I can't even draw breath motherfuckers.

Oh, Emprah, if you could hear my roar,
As I'm waging your eternal war,
Covering the ground with xeno gore
Like Ursarkar Creed, anything is possible.

Never thought I'd be in a dread.
Blood staining my armor red.
Sanguinius, look at me.
Never thought I'd see the day,
I'd watch myself decay.
Believe me when I say
I fought in the Great Crusade.

I'm in a dread.
I'm in a dread.
Everybody start running,
'Cause I'm charging in a dread.
I'm in a dread.
I'm in a dread.
Take a good hard look
At the motherfucking dread.

Tom Jones: Delilah[edit]

I saw the gleam of the claw that she passed through my forces
I saw the flickering red fire of evil in her eyes
She was my daemon
As she decieved me I watched and made plans for her demise

My my my Defiler
Why why why Defiler
I could see, that thing was no good for me
But I found the Warp had a craving for debris

At battle's end when my troops ran away I was waiting
I crossed the field to her spot and she writhed some more
She stood there laughing
I felt my Powerfist clench and she laughed no more

My my my Defiler
Why why why Defiler
So before they come to fuck up my base
Forgive me Defiler I just couldn't take any more
Forgive me Defiler I just couldn't take any more


Cage the Elephant: Ain't no Rest for the Wicked[edit]

I was walking through the Hive
When out the corner of my eye
I saw a filthy teenage girl approaching me.
She said sir can you spare a Throne
For a girl all alone
Perhaps I'd keep you company?
I looked into her eyes
And saw the sin of vice
I knew the Dark Gods held her in their sway
Offering Prayer to the Emperor,
I raised and aimed by Hecutor
And swiftly put a bullet in her head.

Oh, There ain't no rest for the Righteous,
Salvation doesn't come for free,
I got fiends to slay,
I got men to save,
I must strive to bring His Grace to me
I know I can't lose Faith,
I can't give in,
Though sometimes I fear I could,
Oh there ain't no rest for the Righteous,
Until we give our lives for Good.

As I continued through the hive
I go walking past a bar
When a man clad just in paint burst out the door
And then he looked at me and screamed
Swung an axe right at my neck,
I saw no reason or thought behind his eyes
I barely dodged the attack
And knew that I had to fight back
So I steeled myself and drew my gun to fight
I racked my boltgun with a click
And blew apart the heretic
And stood over his corpse right in the street.

Oh, There ain't no rest for the Righteous,
Salvation doesn't come for free,
I got fiends to slay,
I got men to save,
I must strive to bring His Grace to me
I know I can't lose Faith,
I can't give in,
Though sometimes I fear I could,
Oh there ain't no rest for the Righteous,
Until we give our lives for Good.

Now, much later in the day
I went to rest in my own hab,
And watched the pict-vid to find out the latest news
I was listening to reports
About rebellions all around
And felt a fire stirring deep inside my heart
There are enemies without
and there are enemies within,
It's up to us to defend our Imperium
So I urge all mankind to fight
For what we know deep down is right
The sacred glory of the God Emperor of Man!

Oh, There ain't no rest for the Righteous,
Salvation doesn't come for free,
We got fiends to slay,
We got men to save,
We must strive to each live Faithfully
Oh no
We can't give in,
We can't have doubt,
If we want to survive these times.
Oh there ain't no rest for the Righteous,
Until we give our lives for Good.

One night in Bangkok[edit]

[IMPERIAL]
Hive world, Imperial setting
And the hive don't know that the hive is getting
The creme de la creme of the regicide world in a
Show with everything but Ol' Cain

Time flies -- doesn't seem a minute
Since the Slaanesh spa had the regi boys in it
All change -- don't you know that when you
Play at this level there's no ordinary venue

It's Fenris -- or Gravalax -- or a Craftworld -- or -- or this place!

[CULTISTS]
One night in Bangkok and the warp's your oyster
The boys are temples and the girls are free
You'll find a god in every golden cloister
And if you're lucky then the god's a she (right now)
I can feel Slaaneshiis sliding up to me (Oh dear)

[IMPERIAL]
One world's very like another
When your head's down over your pieces, brother

[CULTISTS]
It's a drag, it's a bore, it's really such a pity
To be looking at the board, not looking at the city

[IMPERIAL]
Whaddya mean? Ya seen one crowded, polluted, stinking hive --

[CULTISTS]
Tea, tarts, warm, sweet
Some are set up in the Penthouse Plateau suite

[IMPERIAL]
Frag off! You're talking to a tourist
Whose every game's among the purest
I get my kicks with His blessing, Snotling!

[CULTISTS]
One night in Bangkok makes a Guardsman traitor
Not much between despair and heresy
One night in Bangkok and Inquisitors tumble
Can't be too careful with your company
I can feel a daemon walking next to me

[IMPERIAL]
Yarrick's gonna be the witness
To the ultimate test of cerebral fitness
This provides much more for us
Than a Waaaagh of Orks or a snarling Horus

Praise the Emprah' I'm only watching the game -- controlling it --

I don't see you guys rating
The kind of trap I'm contemplating
I'd let you watch, I would invite you
But the Sisters we use would not excite you

So you better go back to your bars, your temples, your Tarot parlours --

[CULTISTS]
One night in Bangkok and the warp's your oyster
The boys are temples and the girls are free
You'll find a god in every golden cloister
A lot of flesh, a little heresy
I can feel a cultist feeling up on me

One night in Bangkok makes a Guardsman traitor
Not much between despair and heresy
One night in Bangkok and the Seraphim tumble
Can't be too careful with your company
I can feel Eth'reals floating next to me...

Heather Alexander: March of Cambreadth[edit]

Lasgun's flash, chainswords swing,
Bolter's armour-piercing sting,
Warhounds run, flickering void-shields,
Fight Those Heretics till They Yield
Baneblade catterpillars groan,
Fight to Keep this World Your Own
Sound the vox and call the cry,
How Many of Them Can We Make Die!

Follow orders as you're told,
Make Their Daemon Blood Run Cold
Fight until you die or drop,
A Force Like Ours is Hard to Stop
Close your mind to stress and pain,
Fight till You're No Longer Sane
Let not one cultist pass by,
How Many of Them Can We Make Die!

Guard your women and children well,
Send These Bastards Back to Hell
We'll teach them the ways of war,
They Won't Come Here Any More
Use your gun and use your head,
Fight till Every One is Dead
Raise the flag up to the sky,
How Many of Them Can We Make Die!

Dawn has broke, the time has come,
Move Your Feet to a Marching Drum
We'll win the war and pay the toll,
We'll Fight as One in Heart and Soul
Baneblade catterpillars groan,
Fight to Keep this World Your Own
Sound the vox and call the cry,
How Many of Them Can We Make Die!

(Repeat verse 1)

Rutland Weekend Television: Football[edit]

[Commissar]
I blow brains out for the Emperor
[Blood Angel]
For the Chapter, I burn Orks
[Harlequin]
I dismember for The Laughing God
[Warboss]
Oi killz fer Gork an' Mork!

[Inquisitor]
I drop planet-killing bombs on the unclean from up above!
[All]
Yes 40k's the game that we all love!

[Plague Marine]
I spread STDs for Nurgle
[Noise Marine]
And I do it for Slaanesh
[Rubric Marine]
For Tzeench I scatter entrails
[Berzerker]
For Khorne, I'll eat your flesh!

[Chaos Marine]
I wish they'd bring back Malal, 'cause those other four are bores
[All]
Yes, 40k's the game that we adore!

[All]
We love Warhammer!
[Marines]
Cleanse! Purge! Kill!
[Cultist]
Aaah!

[All]
We love Warhammer!
[Chaos Marines]
Maim! Kill! Burn!
[Guardsman]
Ow!

[All]
40k's the game that we adore!

[Dark Eldar Wych]
I loot and rape for pleasure
[Fire Warrior]
I kill for The Greater Good
[Necron Pariah]
I skin people for the Star Gods and then bathe in their blood

[All]
'Cause in the grimdark future there is dick-all else but war
[All]
Yes, 40k's the game that we adore!

[All]
We love Warhammer!
[Necrons]
Move! Shoot! Move!
[Orks]
WAAAUGH!

[All]
We love Warhammer!
[Nids]
Om! Nom! Nom!
[Penitent Engine]
Ohhh!

[All]
40k's the game that we adore!
The End!

Men of Harlech[edit]

Men of Tanith, stop your dreaming,
Can't you see their lasguns gleaming,
Or their ruinous banners streaming,
On this battlefield?

Men of Tanith, stand ye steady!
It shall not be ever said the
Ghosts for battle were not ready.
On you, Tanith men!

From our worlds rebounding,
Let this war cry sounding,
Summon all at Emp'ror's call
The mighty force surrounding!

Oh, men of Tanith, on to glory!
This shall ever be your story
Keep these burning words before ye,
Gaunt's Ghosts shall not yield!

Tongues of las from nalwood flaring,
News of traitors' deaths declaring,
To heroic deeds of daring
call you Tanith men!

Groans of wounded Guardsmen dying,
Wails of wives and children flying,
for the Emp'ror's succor crying
Hear you not their plight?

Shall those voices wailing,
Now be unavailing,
You to rouse who never yet
the Emperor's realm were failing?

This our answer, crowds down pouring
Swift as a bolter's wrath comes roaring
Not in vain, His voice imploring,
calls on Tanith men.

Now to battle we are going,
Every heart with courage glowing,
Pride and passion overflowing
In the glorious strife.

Lo! the din of war enrages,
Vengeance crowns the hate of ages,
Sternly Tanith now engages
the doomed Heretics!

Hear the old pipes playing,
And the soldiers slaying,
Hot the strife while Tanith men
Are lives of traitors claiming.

Lasbolts fly as swift as lightning,
Shout on shout the tumult height'ning,
Aquila's gold wing is bright'ning,
In the Emperor's name!

Loud the Tanith pipes are sounding,
Every guardsman's heart is pounding,
As the trusted Gaunt surrounding,
March you, Tanith men!

Short the sleep the foes is taking,
Ere the morrow's morn is breaking,
They shall have a rude awakening,
Wrought by Tanith men.

With their lasguns flashing,
And Straight Silvers slashing,
Through the traitors' serried ranks
The Tanith men are dashing

Now the heretics are flying,
Trampling on the dead and dying;
Victory aloft is crying,
"Gaunt's Ghosts win the field!"

Manowar: Dawn of Battle[edit]

Dreadful Thunder

The storms moving in

And Judgment day is calling!

My soul has been stolen

By my ascension as Khorne's Chosen!

And the sound of glory !


I will send into the ground

All that are found

By the sign of Warmaker falling!

The Loyalists will fall

I will strike down them all

Then you will know my calling


The Blood God calls my name

In the sound of the wind in the night

My sword will drink blood!

And I will fight

Yes I will fight

In the dawn of battle

Dawn of battle


I will rise up to Khorne's Call!

I will rise up from the grave

A brother of Angron

A master to the slaves


I am the soul Chosen

Of the Khorne's Fire and His Rage

I was wrought upon this galaxy

Born to rule and battle wage


By the total decimation

Of the Imperium at my command!

By the Axe! By the Sword!

By Fire! By my hand!


I give no explanation!

I was branded by Khorne's Will

To bring death and destruction

To all that I now kill!

The Blood God calls my name

In the sound of the wind in the night

My sword will drink blood

And I will fight

Yes I will fight

In the dawn of battle

Dawn of Battle


I long to slay

So I wait for a sign

I wait for the Hordes

To charge from the Eye

From the dusts of carnage

A promise to keep

Then all who see shall believe

Deliver into my hand

The sword that is His Right Hand

Let my journey begin

So all shall understand

That if I fall

I will live again


I will rise up to Chaos' Call

I will rise up from the grave

A brother to the Angron

A master to the slaves


I give no explanation

I was branded by Khorne's Will

To bring Death and Destruction

To all that I now kill


The Blood God calls my name

In the sound of the wind in the night

My sword will drink blood

And I will fight

Yes I will fight

In the dawn of battle

Antoine Dodson and the Gregory Brothers: Bed Intruder[edit]

Chorus:
[Town Crier]
He’s landin' on your planets
He’s snatchin blasphemers up
Gonna purge em so y’all need to
Hide your kids, Hide your wife
Hide your kids, Hide your wife
Hide your kids, Hide your wife
And hide your husband
Cuz they purgin' errbody out here

You don’t have to come and confess,
They lookin' for you
They gon' find you
They gon' find you

So you can run and tell that,
Run and tell that
Run and tell that, heretic
Her- her- heretic

[Acolyte]
We got your DNA
You done left fingerprints and all
You are so dumb
You are really dumb–for real.

You are really, really, really, really, so dumb.

[Witness]
I was attacked by some heretic in the hab-stacks.

[Acolytes]
So dumb, So dumb, So dumb, So

Chorus

[Inquisitor Lord's Report]
'bout 5'9', 5'10'
Pallid complexion, bald cut like Astartes
With some little runes on his head
Clean cut, very gaunt face

Sent in my Sisters, when they walked in,
He had his hands around a tome.
First thing was to grant emperor's mercy,
And that's what they did.
Sororitas: ('ey!)

Chorus

[Inquisitor Lord]
Well, obviously we have a cultist in Lincoln Park

[Battle-Sister]
Are you serious, My Lord?

We got your dagger
We got your scent
I know what shoe size you wear, my boy
So you can run and hide
But we're gonna find you
Find you

Chorus x2


Ozzy: Crazy train[edit]

Black Rage, but that's how it goes
Millions of traitors living as foes
Pretty sure it is too late
To learn how to love
And forget how to hate

Mortal wounds are healing
Life's a bitter shame
Im getting an extra save with my Feel No Pain
Im getting an extra save with my Feel No Pain

Let's Go!

I listen to chaplains
To get rerolls
I fight against Bloodthirst
Got my own set of rules
One person conditioned to keep some control
And Astorath lets me live just for the lulz

Mental wounds still screaming
Driving me insane
I'm fighting against Horus crazy brain
I'm im kicking Horus' ass in my crazy brain

I know that things are pretty wrong with me
You gotta listen to my RAGE
FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU...

Death company Chaplain
That's what we've become
Inheriting troubles I'm mentally numb
Crazy, I just cannot bear
I'm living with something' that just isn't fair

Had a wound inflicted
Anyone to blame
I'm going off the rails with my unbound rage
I'm going off the rails with my unbound rage

SSgt Barry Sadler: Ballade Of The Space Marines.[edit]

Fighting soldiers from the sky
Fearless men who jump and die
Men who haunt the Xenos' dreams
The brave men of the Space Marines

Golden wings upon their chests
More than men, the Imperium's best
Today we test one hundred teens
But only one joins the Space Marines

Altered to live off any land
Trained in combat, hand to hand
Never to hide their colours' sheen
They wear them proud for the Space Marines

Golden wings upon their chests
More than men, the Imperium's best
Today we test one hundred teens
But only one joins the Space Marines

When at last, he is released
One more Marine finds The Emperor's Peace
He has died for those oppressed
Leaving his Chapter one request

Cut the geneseed from my chest
To live again in the Imperium's best
One more young man to guard the hopes and dreams
Of all Mankind as a Space Marine

When You're Eldrad[edit]

When Asuryan is too busy, and Khaine's a bit too much
They call me, by name you see, for my special touch
To the seers I'm a legend, to the mon'keigh I'm a dick
But call me by any name, any way it's all the same

I'm the gore on your shoe
I'm the pebble in your boot
I'm the daemon in your bed
I'm the bolt in every head

I'm the mine on which you step
I'm the pin in every hip
I'm the spore in your eye, makes you wiggle and writhe

And it's so easy when you're Eldrad
This is the life you see, the council tip their hats to me
I do it all because I'm Eldrad
And I do it all for free
Your rage is all the pay I'll ever need

While there's mon'keigh to make sad
While there's lulz left to be had
While there's pockets left to pick
While there's Dreadnoughts left to trip
down the stairs I'll be there, I'll be waiting 'round the corner
It's a game, I'm glad I'm in it
'Cause there's one born every minute

And it's so easy when you're Eldrad
This is the life you see, the council tip their hats to me
I do it all because I'm Eldrad
And I do it all for free
Your rage is all the pay I'll ever need

I pledge my allegiance
To all things skub and derp
Promise on my old Soul Stone
To do as I am told
For Cegorach has never seen
A seer quite like me, not only
does his job but does it happily

I'm the fear that keeps you 'wake
I'm the shadows in the Warp
I'm the Daemons they become
I'm the nightmare in your skull

I'm a Witchblade in your back
An extra turn upon the rack
I'm the quivering of your heart
A stabbing pain, a sudden start

And it's so easy when you're Eldrad
This is the life you see, the council tip their hats to me
I do it all because I'm Eldrad
And I do it all for free
Your rage is all the pay I'll ever need

And I do it all for free
Your rage is all the pay I'll ever need X2

It gets so ronery being Eldrad
What I'd do to see a Codex
Even for a little while
And no one loves you when you're Eldrad

I'm lying through my teeth
Your rage is all the comforting I need!

Weebl: Cucumber song (Spire Legis)[edit]

We is takin' a truk
Down ta Spire Legis
Cuz we 'ave 'eard they is all 'ummie free
Which makes it safe fer us ta plant new orkses
All fer teh WAAAGH
Just ya sees

'Ummies are the orkses enemies
They try an' stomp us with their bitz
The only way few our boyz ta escape is
Drivin' a truk down the street!

Secret of Survival (The Wind In The Willows)[edit]

[All Four]
First you see us…
[Tzeentch]
Then you don’t…
(All four disappear)
[Khorne]
Now you hear us….
[Nurgle]
Now you won’t…
[All four (reappearing behind Traveler’s back)]
It’s our secret of survival
In a very nasty Warp.
[Slaanesh]
Now you feel us…
[Khorne]
Now you can't.
[Nurgle]
Are we real?
[Tzeentch]
Perhaps we aren't!
[All Four]
It's our secret of survival
In a very nasty Warp!
It's our secret of survival
In a very nasty Warp!
[Traveler]
Is it really such a nasty place?
[Voice of Malal]
Oh yes, a very nasty place indeed
[All Four:]
Nastier than you could ever dream of!
[Tzeentch]
From up above…
[Nurgle]
And from beneath…
[Slaanesh]
Daemons…
[Khorne]
Armed to teeth.
[All Four]
Ready to attack you,
You're a snack - and you'd better run!
[Khorne]
Don't come to Innmaterium
If you haven't got a gun!
[All four]
Hahahahahaha!
[Tzeentch]
Every creature of the Chaos
Has to look out for itself!
[Slaanesh]
Got no Emperor here, or Space Marines
You could call for help
[Nurgle]
You're in the Warp boy
And every child could
Tell you that you've got no
Business to be here!
[All Four]
Oooooooooooooooooooooh!
[Slaanesh]
First you see us…
[Tzeentch]
Then you don’t…
[Nurgle]
Now you hear us…
[Khorne]
Now you won't.
[All Four]
It's our secret of survival
In a very nasty Warp!
[Slaanesh]
Now you feel us…
[Nurgle]
Now you can't…
[Khorne]
Are we real?
[Tzeentch]
Perhaps we aren't!
[All Four:]
It's our secret of survival
It’s our secret of survival
It's our secret of survival
In a very nasty Warp!

Sabaton- Panzer Battalion[edit]

Out of the warp no Daemos we fear
Piercing the void as we charge
An armoured battlecruiser on course to the expanse
Closing the end of it's march

This time we're here to finish a job
Started a millenia ago
Driving the heretics out of their holes
To bury them with promethium

Armoured guns of mass destruction
Killers in the expanse
Rats who dares to stand before us
Feel our lance go live

[Chorus:] Death in the shape of a Lunar battlecruiser
Insolent xenos don't run face your fate you are dead
cannot outrun our Lunar battlecruiser

Millions of tons of armour and guns
Making it's way through the expanse
Our Lunar battlecruiser is back for revenge
Artillery sweeping the land

First strike is ours no mercy is shown
There's rivers of blood in our track
Breaking their waves of defence with our guns
Emperor watching our back

Blow their void shield clear for deep strike
Ready for the storm
Minefields swept there's no surrender
Feel our lances burn

[Chorus x2]

Out of the warp no Daemos we fear
Piercing the void as we charge
An armoured battlecruiser on course to the expanse
Has reached the end of it's march

Armoured guns of mass destruction
Killers in the expanse
Rats who dares to stand before us
Feel our lance go live

Lunar battlecruiser
Insolent xenos don't run face your fate you are dead
Lunar battlecruiser

Hallelujah[edit]

Written by yours truly.

I heard there was a secret word,
that Goto wrote and it pleased the Board,
but you don't care for canon, do you?
It goes like this, the fourth, the fifth,
Horus' fall, the Angel's lift,
Boreale was shouting "Hail the Emprah"
Hail the Emprah, Hail the Emprah,
Hail the Emprah, Hail the Emprah...

Khorne made you strong, but you were don goof',
when Eversor bursted through the roof,
he shouted WRYYYYYYYYYY right before he killed ya.
He murdered all your buddies there,
cut off your limbs, ripped out your hair
And from your lips came the "Death to Emprah"
Death to Emprah, Death to Emprah,
Death to Emprah, Death to Emprah...

Heretic I have seen before,
in a bio-ship I walked the floor,
walls came alive and all tried to kill ya.
Creed's flag appeared on battleships,
infiltrated tanks blew them to bits,
through darkest space was shouted "Screw the Emprah!"
Screw the Emprah, Screw the Emprah,
Screw the Emprah, Screw the Emprah...

There was a time, t'was a good show,
when Eldar appeared by row,
And Eldrad screwed us over big time.
The Necrons from the darkest depths,
send entire regiments to their deaths,
the Guardsmen were all shouting "Where's the Emprah?!"
Where's the Emprah, Where's the Emprah,
Where's the Emprah, Where's the Emprah...

Well on the distant Terra,
sits our beloved Emprah,
guiding his children through these dark times.
Gods of Chaos, beasts from beyond,
monsters by the ancients spawned,
we raise our fist and shout "AVE EMPRAH!"
AVE EMPRAH, AVE EMPRAH,
AVE EMPRAH, AVE EMPRAH!

Where there's a whip, there's a way (The Lord Of The Rings)[edit]

Wher ther’z Gork
Ther’z Mork
And Wher ther’z Mork
Ther’z Gork
Wher ther’z Gork
We wanntz go to WAAAGH todayz
Umiess don’t run, fight uz, heyz, heyz, heyz
Ther will be WAAAGH all dayz, all dayz, all dayz!
Ther’z Mork
And Wher ther’z Mork, ther’z Gork!
Wher ther’z Gork
Ther’z Mork
And Wher ther’z Mork
Ther’z Gork
Wher ther’z Gork
Ther’z Mork
Letz WAAAAGH! Letz WAAAGH!
And wher ther’z Mork, ther’z Gork
Get in da choppa, cuz werz gonna fight!
There will be WAAAGH all dayz and nightz and mooar
Cuz thiz iz what the Orkz livez foooor!
Letz WAAAGH! Letz WAAAGH!
Wher ther’z Gork
Ther’z Mork
And wher ther’z Mork
Ther’z Gork
Wher ther’z Gork
We wanntz go to WAAAGH todayz
Umiess don’t run, fight uz, hey, hey, hey
Ther will be WAAAGH all dayz, all dayz, all dayz!
Ther’z Mork
And Where ther’z Mork, ther’z Gork!
Letz WAAAGH! Letz WAAAGH!
Letz WAAAGH! Letz WAAAGH!


I'm a good ol' heretic[edit]

Oh, I'm a good ol' heretic
Yeah, that's just what I am
And for your rotting corpse-god I do not give a damn
I'm glad I fought for Horus, I only wish we'd won
And I don't want no pardon for anything I've done

I hates the damn Imperium, those spergin' Cogboys, too
I hates those preening braggarts in uniforms of blue
I hates the nasty Aquila, with all its brags and fuss
And those lyin', thievin' Magpies lead by some coiffured wuss

I hates the Administratum and everything they do
I hates the Inquisition, their fucking Grey Knights, too
I hates those fool Astartes, I hates the Golden Throne
I hates the Ecclesiarchy praying to worthless bones

I fought with the Warmaster for ten score years and some
I caught some bolter fire, got an augmetic thumb
I lost more bits to frostbite, a campin' in the snow
But I killed a bunch of Loyalists, I'd love to kill some mo'

Now forty thousand Loyalists are dead in Istvaan dust
We got some more on Terra, before they killed Horus
They died to Chaos bolters, lasguns and plasma shots
Wish we'd killed forty billion, instead of what we got

We couldn't conquer Terra, but someday it'll burn
Inside the Eye of Terror we're planning our return
So I don't need no pardon for the way that I was made
Nor for the things I'll do to you in our next Black Crusade

Oh I'm a good ol' heretic, now that's just what I am
Yeah, I'm a good ol' heretic, now that's just what I am

Sailor Moon: Sayla Ork[edit]

Sayla.jpg

Foightin' evil boi moonlite

Winnin' lurv boi daylite

Nevah runnin' from a real foight

'e iz sa un named Salya Mork (or iz it Gork?)


'e will... Neva turn 'is back onna boy

'e iz... Always dere ta destroy

'e iz... Da un on 'oo we can depend

'he iz da un named Sayla...


...Sayla Choppa

...Sayla Dakka

...Sayla Foightin'

...Sayla Winnin'


Wiff sekrit powahs

All so noo ta 'im

'e iz da un named Sayla Mork (or is it Gork?)


Foightin' evil boi moonlite

Winnin' lurv boi daylite

Wiff 'iz Sayla Boyz to 'elp foight

'e iz da un named Sayla Mork (or is it Gork?)

'e iz da un named Sayla Mork (or is it Gork?)

'e iz da un... Sayla ORK!

Electric Light Orchestra - Mr Blue Sky[edit]

Warp storm shattered from the sky
There ain't a witch in sight
It's steel rehnin, Spess Mareens are on the way
And don't you know
It's a beautiful new day hey, hey

Runnin' down the avenue
See how his hair shines brightly, in the hive
On the streets, where crime was rife
The Emperah is living here today hey, hey

Emperah guy, please tell us why
You had to die away for so long
Where did we go wrong?

Emperah guy, please tell us why
You had to die away for so long
Where did we go wrong?

Hey you with the godly face
Welcome to your loyal race
A celebration, The Emperah's up there waitin'
And today is the day we've waited for

Emperah guy, please tell us why
You had to die away for so long
Where did we go wrong?

Hey there Emperah
We're so pleased to be with ya
Look around see what you do
Ev'rybody smiles at you

Hey there Emperah
We're so pleased to be with ya
Look around see what you do
Ev'rybody smiles at you

Emperah guy, Emperah guy
Emperah guy

Emperah, you did it right
But here comes a khornate knight creepin' over
Now his hand is on your shoulder
Never mind I'll remember you this
I'll remember you this way

Emperah guy please tell us why
You had to die away for so long
Where did we go wrong?

Hey there Emperah
We're so pleased to be with ya
Look around see what you do
Ev'rybody smiles at you
Ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba
Ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba

Monty Python: Lumberjack Song[edit]

[Tech Priest]

I wanted to be... a Space Marine!
Killing so many different xenos, as they war against planets all across the Imperium. The undying Immortals. The Nobs. The Wraiths! The formidable Farseer! The constantly screaming Warboss! The plucky little Slugga Boyz! The lumbering Kroot hounds of the Tau. The towering Big Meks of the Orks! The gargantuan Mega Armoured Nobs!

With my squad mates by my side, we'd purge! purge! purge!

[Tech Priest]

I'm a Space Marine, and I'm okay.
I purge all night and I burn all day.

[Space Marine Squad]

He's a Space Marine, and he's okay.
He purges all night and he burns all day.

[Tech Priest]

I burn the Orks. I shoot the Tau.
I use chainswords for Eldar.
On Wednesdays I hunt Necron,
And praise Khorne in my battles!

[Space Marine Squad]

He burns the Orks. He shoots the Tau.
He uses chanswords on Eldar.
On Wednesdays he hunts Necron,
And praises Khone in battle...?
He's a Space Marine, and he's okay.
He purges all night and he burns all day.

[Tech Priest]

I burn the Orks. I praise Chaos.
I like to rape and maim.
I put on chaos symbols
And praise heretic gods.

[Space Marine Squad]

He burns the Orks. He praises Chaos.
He likes to rape and maim.
He puts on chaos symbols
And praises heretic gods?!
He's a Space Marine, and he's okay.
He purges all night and he burns all day.

[Tech Priest]

I burn the Orks. I wear warp blades,
talismans, and a mark.
I wish I'd been a daemon,
Just like my dear Papa.

[Space Marine Squad]

He burns the Orks. He wears warp blades,
talismans, and a mark?!

[Inquisitor]

What's this? Wants to be a daemon?! Oh, My!
And I thought you were so loyal! Traitor!

Dear sir, I wish to complain on the strongest possible terms about the song which you have just broadcast about the space marine who is a servant to chaos. Many of my best freinds are Space Marines and only a few of them are servants to chaos!

Avenue Q: The internet is for Porn.[edit]

Sung by Kharn and a Cannoness

The Imperium is really really great
For Khorne!
I’ve got a fast starship so i don’t have to wait
For Khorne!
There's always some new fight,
For Khorne!
I war all day and night
For Khorne!
It's like i’m killing at the speed of light
For Khorne!

The Imperium is for Khorne
The Imperium is for Khorne,
Why you think the Warp was born?
Khorne, Khorne, Khorne!

I’m glad that we have Warp technology
For Khorne!
Which gives us untold opportunity
For Khorne!
Fight from your tabletop
For Khorne!
You can plunder rape and chop
For Khorne!
Until you've had enough and you're ready to stop
For Khorne!

The Imperium is for Khorne
The Imperium is for Khorne,
Me up all night gathering skulls for Khorne, Khorne, Khorne!

[SPOKEN]

[Canoness] That’s gross! You’re a heretic

[Kharn]
Ah, sticks and stones Cannoness

[Canoness]
NO really, you're a heretic Normal people don’t run around killing in the Imperium

[Kharn]
Ohhhh?

[Canoness]
What?!

[Kharne]
You have no idea Ready normal people?

[Abbadon, Horus, Angron]
Ready

Let me hear it!

[Kharn and guys]

The Imperium is for Khorne!
[Abbadon]

Sorry Emp

[Kharn and guys]

The Imperium is for Khorne!

[Horus]

I eviscerate!
[Kharn and guys]

All these guys unshethe their swords
For Khorne, Khorne, Khorne!

[Cannoness]

The Imperium is not for Khorne!!

[Kharn and guys]
Khorne, Khorne, K---


[Cannoness]

HOLD ON A SECOND!
Now I happen to know for a fact that you, Abbadon, rely on the Imperium to kill off your excess followers

[Abbadon]

That’s correct.

[Cannoness]

And Horus, you once saved the Emperor's life

[Horus]

Sure!

[Cannoness]

And Angron, you keep killing whenever you can

[Angron]

Yes I do!

[Cannoness]

And Kharn, you love kitten

[Kharne]

True!

[Kharne]

Oh, but Cannoness
What you think we do after? hmm?

[Abbadon]
...yeah

(EEEWWWWW!)
The Imperium is for Khorne!
Heretics!
The Imperium is for Khorne!
I hate Khorne
Grab your axe and cleave and hack
For Khorne, Khorne, Khorne!
(harmonizing) Khorne, Khorne, Khorne, Khorne
I’m leaving!
Khorne Khorne Khorne Khorne
Khorne Khorne Khorne Khorne
I hate the Imperium!
Khorne, Khorne, Khorne, Khorne

The Imperium is for
The Imperium is for
The Imperium is for Khorne!

YEAH!

Sabaton: Nuclear Attack[edit]

Prepare for cyclonic attack!

Dropped from low orbit, the xenos erased
Threat to mankind is contained
A power unheard of, a power unseen
Flash out of nowhere, the world is burning
8:16 Standard, the Tyranid swarms realized something was wrong
The swarm feels explosions, destruction and pain
Air strike from space, tendril gone in a blaze!

Ships painted black, Inquisition turning back
Prepare for cyclonic attack!
Bombed into the dust
Prepare for cyclonic attack!
Exterminatus
Strike back!
Xenos filth will bleed
Another cyclonic attack!

From the Necrons came the second assault
Threat to tomorrow made plain
11:02 on the 9th of August
Over the world's curve like ball lightning
The bomb detonates, and the world turns to waste
Barren for all time to come
The Monoliths burning, the Tomb World destroyed
Surrender your war, else you'll perish in flame!

Second attack, Inquisition turning back
Prepare for cyclonic attack!
Bombed into the dust
Prepare for cyclonic attack!
Exterminatus
Strike back!
Xenos filth will bleed
Another cyclonic attack!

Ships painted black, Inquisition turning back

Another, another, another
Cyclonic attack!
Bombed into the dust
Prepare for cyclonic attack!
Exterminatus
Strike back!
Xenos filth will bleed
Another cyclonic attack!
Bombed into the dust
Prepare for cyclonic attack!
Exterminatus!
Strike back!
Xenos filth will bleed
Another cyclonic attack!
A cyclonic attack!


The Scarlet Pimpernel: Into The Fire[edit]

Pius stood before Horus,
with his las clutched in his hand.
He was only a man
But he knew someone must take a stand.

There will always be a battle
but remember our Lord's grace.
there will always be perilous dangers
which someone must face.

Into valleys, into waters
Into jungles, into hell
Let us ride, let us ride home again with a story to tell.
Into darkness, into danger,
Into storms that rip the night,
Don't give in, or give up,
But give thanks for the glorious fight.

You can tremble, you can fear it,
But keep your fighting spirit alive boys.
Let the shiver of it sting you,
Fling into battle, spring to your feet boys.
Never hold back your step for a moment,
Never doubt that your courage will grow,
Hold your head even higher and into the fire we go .

Are there cultists that surround us?
Are there orks that block the way?
Shoot'em down, knock'em back boys,
And forward and into the fray.

Into terror, into valour,
Charge ahead, no, never turn.
Yes, it's into the Warp that we'll fly,
And it's Chaos who'll burn...

Someone has to face the valley
Rush in, we have to rally and win boys
When the world is saying not to
Emprah, you know you've got to march on, boys
Never hold back your step for a moment.
Never doubt that your courage will grow.
Hold your head ever higher and into fire we go

Let the lasgun strike
Let the flash of it shock you
Choke your fears away
Pull as tight as a wire
Let the fever strike
Let the force of it rock you
We will have our day, charging into the fire.

Someone has to face the valley
Rush in! We have to rally and win boys
When the world is saying not to
By God, you know you've got to march on, boys
Never hold back your step for a moment
Look alive! Oh, your courage will grow
Yes, it's higher and higher and into the fire we go
Into fire!
Onward, ho!


Rick Astley: Never Gonna Give You Up[edit]

We's no strangers to WAAAGH!
We frags ‘em all, shoots ‘em in da eye
A full bombardment's what we’s finkin’ of
We’s gonna make sure that ya all’s gonna die
We’s jus’ wanna gives ya all a beatin’
Gonna make ya good ‘n’ dead

We’s all gonna blow ya up
We’s all gonna put ya down
Gonna run ya to da ground ‘n’ we’ll stomp ya
We’s all gonna make ya cry
You’s all gonna say good-bye
Gonna kills ya till ya die ‘n’ hurt ya

We's fought each otha fer so long
Yer arrmy's all breakin’ but
Ya don’t wants ta quits it
Ya ‘n’ me both knows that it won’t be long
We’s gonna win, ‘n’ yer gonna loze it
‘N’ I fink ya all shud be fleein’
Don't tell me you's too blind ta see

We’s all gonna blow ya up
We’s all gonna put ya down
Gonna run ya to da ground ‘n’ we’ll stomp ya
We’s all gonna make ya cry
You’s all gonna say good-bye
Gonna kills ya till ya die ‘n’ hurt ya

We’s all gonna blow ya up
We’s all gonna put ya down
Gonna run ya to da ground ‘n’ we’ll stomp ya
We’s all gonna make ya cry
You’s all gonna say good-bye
Gonna kills ya till ya die ‘n’ hurt ya

(WAAAGH, blow ya up)
(WAAAGH, blow ya up)
(WAAAGH!)
We’s all gonna blow, we’s all gonna blow
(Blow ya up)
(WAAAGH!)
We’s all gonna blow, we’s all gonna blow
(Blow ya up)

We's fought each otha fer so long
Yer arrmy's all breakin’ but
Ya don’t wants ta quits it
Ya ‘n’ me both knows that it won’t be long
We’s gonna win, ‘n’ yer gonna loze it
We’s jus’ wanna gives ya all a beatin’
Gonna make ya good ‘n’ dead

We’s all gonna blow ya up
We’s all gonna put ya down
Gonna run ya to da ground ‘n’ we’ll stomp ya
We’s all gonna make ya cry
You’s all gonna say good-bye
Gonna kills ya till ya die ‘n’ hurt ya

We’s all gonna blow ya up
We’s all gonna put ya down
Gonna run ya to da ground ‘n’ we’ll stomp ya
We’s all gonna make ya cry
You’s all gonna say good-bye
Gonna kills ya till ya die ‘n’ hurt ya

We’s all gonna blow ya up
We’s all gonna put ya down
Gonna run ya to da ground ‘n’ we’ll stomp ya
We’s all gonna make ya cry
You’s all gonna say good-bye
Gonna kills ya till ya die ‘n’ hurt ya


Wuppa Orky style (PSY: Gangnam Style)[edit]

Wuppa Orky style
Orky style

I love a bomma who is warm and shooty by day,
A classy bomma who knows how to bring the freedom of da WAAAAGH! to a planet
A bomma whose moves gets sharper when fighting comes
A bomma with that kind of twist

I'm a Greenskin
A Greenskin who is as warm as you during the day
A Greenskin who one-shots his enemy HQ with a Powa Klaw
A Greenskin whose hearts bursts when the fight comes
That kind of Greenskin

Beautiful, lovely
Yes you, hey, yes you, hey
Beautiful, lovely
Wuppa Orky style
Orky style

I love a Squig who is warm and passionate by day,
A classy Squig who knows how to chase enemy vehicles when packed with bomz
A Squig whose anticipation gets crazier when fighting comes
A Squig with that kind of twist

I'm a Boy
A Boy who is as warm as you during the day
A Boy who is bold as a lion with 11 other boyz
A Boy whose feet fleets when the WAAAGH! comes
That kind of Boy

Beautiful, loveable
Yes you, hey, yes you, hey
Beautiful, loveable
Yes you, hey, yes you, hey
Now let's go until the end

Wuppa Orky style, Orky style
Wuppa Orky style, Orky style
Wuppa Orky style

Eh- Zoomin’ bomma! Wup, wup, wup wup Wuppa Orky style
Eh- Zoomin’ bomma! oh oh oh oh

A shoota who looks classy but is killy when it shoots
A shoota who puts da foes down when the right time comes
A shoota who covers itself but is more sexy than a shoota who bares it all
A sensible shoota like that

I'm a Nob
A Nob who seems irate and gets angry when he plays
A Nob who goes completely crazy when the right time comes
A Nob who has bulging Klaws as well as muscles
That kind of Ork

Beautiful, loveable
Yes you, hey, yes you, hey
Beautiful, loveable
Yes you, hey, yes you, hey
Now let's go until the end

Wuppa Orky style, Orky style
Wuppa Orky style, Orky style
Wuppa Orky style

Eh- Kustom forcefield, wup, wup, wup wup wuppa Mekboy style
Eh- Kustom forcefield oh oh oh oh

On top of the running bug is the flying Greenskin, baby baby
I'm a pilot who knows a thing or two
On top of the running bug is the flying Greenskin, baby baby
I'm a Ork who knows a thing or two

You know what I'm saying
Wuppa Orky style

Eh- Furious charging, wup, wup, wup wup Wuppa is Orky style
Eh- Furious charging oh oh oh oh

Yes you, hey, yes you, hey
Shall we go all the way from now on?
Wuppa Orky style, Orky style
Wuppa Orky style, Orky style
Wuppa Orky style

Eh- Choppy choppa, wup, wup, wup wup wuppa Orky style
Eh- Choppy choppa oh oh oh oh

A choppa who looks quiet but plays when I plays
A choppa who puts me foes down when the right time comes
A choppa who covers itself but is more sexy than a choppa who bares it all
A sensible choppa like that

I'm a Warboss
A Warboss who dreams big but WAAAGHS! when he WAAAGHS!
A Warboss who goes completely crazy when the right time comes
A Warboss who has bulging ideas as well as muscles
That kind of Ork

Beautiful, loveable
Yes you, hey, yes you, hey
Beautiful, loveable
Yes you, hey, yes you, hey
Now let's go until the end

Wuppa Orky style, Orky style
Wuppa Orky style, Orky style
Wuppa Orky style

Eh- Zzappin’ Weirdboy, Greenskin is Orky style
Eh- Zzappin’ Weirdboy oh oh oh oh

On top of the running Xenos is the flying Marine, baby baby
I'm a Greenskin who knows a fing or two
On top of the running bug is the flying Greenskin, baby baby
I'm a Greenskin who knows a thing or two
You know what I'm saying

Dis boy is Orky style
Eh- Dakka dakka, dak, dak, dak dak dakka Orky styleEh- Dakka dakka oh oh oh oh

Wuppa Orky style
Orky style

I love Mega armour who is big and protecty by day,
Da classy Mega armour who know how to bring the freedom from enemy dakka
Da Mega armour whose protection gets better when fighting comes
Da Mega armour with that kind of twist

I'm a Killa Kan
A Killa Kan who is as big as da rest of da boyz
A Killa Kan who goes about bein’ stompy
A Killa Kan whose rokkits bursts when they hit da enemy
That kind of Killa Kan

Beautiful, lovely
Yes you, hey, yes you, hey
Beautiful, lovely

Wuppa Orky style
Greenskin style

I love a Deff rolla who is round and spikey by day,
A classy Deff rolla who know how to bring the squish to an enemy planet
A Deff rolla whose spikes gets sharper when fighting comes
A Deff rolla with that kind of twist

I'm a Weirdboy
A Weirdboy who is as sane as you during the day
A Weirdboy who squiggifies his enemy HQ before it even chops boyz
A Weirdboy whose brain hursts when the fight comes
That kind of Weirdboy

Beautiful, loveable
Yes you, hey, yes you, hey
Beautiful, loveable
Yes you, hey, yes you, hey
Now let's go until the end

Wuppa Orky style, Orky style
Wuppa Orky style, Orky style
Wuppa Orky style

Eh- Shooty Lootas, Wup, wup, wup wup Wuppa Orky style
Eh- Shooty Lootas oh oh oh oh

A Looted gun who looks loud but dakkas when it dakkas
A Looted gun who puts her foes down when the right time comes
A Looted gun who covers da enemy in shooty and is more deadly than a Looted gun who misses dem all
A sensible Looted gun like that

I'm a Painboy
A Painboy who seems calm but plays when he oprates
A Painboy who goes completely crazy when the brai-squigg transplant comes
A Painboy who has sharp ideas as well as instruments
That kind of Painboy

Beautiful, loveable
Yes you, hey, yes you, hey
Beautiful, loveable
Yes you, hey, yes you, hey
Now let's go until the end

Wuppa Orky style, Orky style
Wuppa Orky style, Orky style
Wuppa Orky style

Eh- Battle wagon, vroom, vroom, vroom, vroom vroomah Greenskin style
Eh- Battle wagon oh oh oh oh

I'm a Greenskin who knows a fing or two
On top of the running bug is the flying Greenskin, baby baby
I'm a Greenskin who knows a thing or two
You know what I'm saying
Wuppa Orky style

Eh- Dakka Jet, wup, wup, wup wup Wuppa
Eh- Dakka Jet oh oh oh oh

Yes you, hey, yes you, hey
Shall we go all the way from now on?
Wuppa Orky style, Orky style
Wuppa Orky style, Orky style
Wuppa Orky style

Eh- Choppy chainsword, wup, wup, wup wup wuppa Orky style
Eh- Choppy chainsword oh oh oh oh

A chainsword who looks quiet but plays when she plays
A chainsword who puts her foes down when the right time comes
A chainsword who covers herself but is more sexy than a chainsword who bares it all
A sensible chainsword like that

I'm a Flashgit
A Flashgit who seems rich but shoots when he shoots
A Flashgit who goes completely dakka when the right time comes
A Flashgit who has a bulging belly as well as a snazzgun
That kind of Flashgit

Beautiful, loveable
Yes you, hey, yes you, hey
Beautiful, loveable
Yes you, hey, yes you, hey
Now let's go until the end

Wuppa Orky style, Orky style
Wuppa Orky style, Orky style
Wuppa Orky style

Eh- wretched gretchin, little runt aint Greenskin style
Eh- wretched gretchin oh oh oh oh

On top of the running bugeyes is the flying Greenskin, baby baby
I'm a Greenskin who knows a fing or two
On top of the running bug is the flying Greenskin, baby baby
I'm a Greenskin who knows a thing or two
You know what I'm saying

Dat boy is Orky style

Eh- Zoomin’ bomma! Wup, wup, wup wup Wuppa Orky style
Eh- Zoomin’ bomma! oh oh oh oh

Warriors Of Terra (Manowar: Warriors of the World)[edit]

Here I see you stand from all around the worlds Waiting in a line to hear the battle cry All are gathered here, victory is near The sound will fill the hall, bringing power to us all

We alone are fighting for the Emperor that is true We own the right to live the fight, we're here for all of you Now swear the blood upon your steel will never dry Stand and fight together beneath the battle sky

Brothers everywhere - raise your hands into the air We're warriors, warriors of Terra Like thunder from the sky - sworn to fight and die We're warriors, warriors of Terra

Many stand against us, but they will never win We said we would return and here we are again To bring them all destruction, suffering and pain We are the hammer of His wrath, we are thunder, wind and rain.

There they wait in fear with swords in feeble hands With dreams to be a king, first one should be a man I call about and charge them all with a life that is a lie And in their final hour they shall repent before they die

If I should fall in battle, my brothers who fight by my side Gather my armor and weapons, tell teh chapter how I died Until then I will be strong, I will fight for all that is real All who stand in my way will die by steel

Brothers everywhere - raise your hands into the air We're warriors, warriors of Terra


I Love the Whole Board (I Love the Whole World)[edit]

Emperor:

I love all humans

I love our smog-filled hives

I love crusading

And taking xenos lives

I love the galaxy

With all its sights and sounds


BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA


Horus:

I love Heresy

I love the sound of screams

I love Isstvaan

Even the plague marines

I love my legion

And crashing Terra's gates


BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA


Da Orkz:

I love WAAAAAGH-ing!

I love my mobs of boyz!

and being choppy!

I love my deffgun's noise!

I love da fightan'!

WE'RE DA BEST, YA GITS!


BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA


OI LOVE ME WARBOSS

OI LOVE ME BIG DEFF GUN

OI LOVE DEM 'UMIES

THE WAY DEY SCREAM AN' RUN

OI LOVE DA WHOLE WORLD

N' ALL ITZ SIGHTS N' SOUNDS


BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA


Eldar:

I loathe my dark kin

I loathe the orkish hordes

I loathe the mon'keigh

The Yngir even more

I loathe you all, worms

You are beneath my race


BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA


Kharn:

I love betraying

I love to rip and tear

I love my chain-axe

Heads flying through the air

I love destroying

And punches to the face


BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA


Tau:

I love my homeland

I love our high-tech suits

I love converting

And training new recruits

I love the Greater Good

And taming lawless brutes!


BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA


Tzeentch:

I love all changes

To men and to their land

I love to teach them

More than their brains can stand

I love to ca-ckle...

... Just-As-Plaaaned


BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA


Indrick Boreale:

I love the EMPRAH

I love to see STEHL REHN

I love SPESS MEHRENES

Be every ork in PEHN

I love BLUD REHVENS

And seeing ENEMEHS DIE


BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA


Trazyn: I love collecting

Obryon: I love my warscythe's bite

Orikan: I love my visions

Orikan Empowered: AND WHEN THE STARS ARE RIGHT

Imotekh: I love my subjects

Despite their craziness


BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA


Space Wolves:

I love Russ' beard

And ales of potent strength

I love riding wolves

and their enormous length

I love the whole fang

and every bar and drink


BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA


Angry Marines:

I HATE THE EVERYTHING

FUCK SHIT ASS CUNT RAPE TEAR

BADGER SPLAT RAGE DESTROY

SOME ANAL BLEEDING THERE

I HATE THE XENOS

I KILL SHIT IN THE FACE


FUCK-DE-ASSHOLE FUCK-DE-ASSHOLE FUCK-DE-ASSHOLE FUCK-DE-ASSHOLE


Macha:

I love virginity

And being your waifu

I love the emperor

One day I'll be his too

I love the galaxy

It's such a silly place


BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA


Eisenhorn:

I love the purging

I love the holy flame

I love the Emprah

I love his holy name

I love my day-job

Purging all over space


BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA


Butthurt Casual:

I HATE GEEDUBYA

AND ALL THEIR JEWY WAYS

I HATE WARHAMMER

AND SPEHSS MEHREENS ARE GAY

I PLAY WARMAHORDES

IT'S THE SUPERIOR GAME


BOOM DE WHINING BOOM DE WHINING BOOM DE WHINING BOOM DE WHINING


Matt Ward:

I love your money

I love to rape the fluff

With decent rule sets

(ignore those Grey Knights buffs)

I love 40k

Except the Sisters stuff


BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA


Black Templars:

I love my chainswords

I love to RIP AND TEAR

I love assault marines

Zerg Rushes EVERYWHERE

I love this crusade

I hope it never ends


BOOM DE YADA BOOM DA YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA


Sisters of Battle:

I love to burn things

All heretics will die!

With many meltas

And flamers they will fry,

I praise the emprah

New codex coming soon (?)


BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA


Inquisition:

I love to purge things

Burn each and every witch!

And for the xenos

Exterminatus bitch!

We're inquisitors

They never expect us.


BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA


Games Workshop:

I love more money

I love our cheap finecast

I love the pricehikes

Stick balance up your ass

I love you /tg/

We'll milk more money yet


BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA


Dark Eldar:

I love your anus

I love to torture you

With many poisons

while dressed extremely lewd

I love hedonism

I don't see what's to hate


BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA


Kroot:

I love Tau money

I love real special genes

I love to go fight

I love evolving things

I love this whole world

And all its tastiness


BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA


Guardsman and Tyranids:

I love the- OH SHIT

WHAT THE HELL IS THAT THING?

DID IT JUST- EMPRAH, NO!

TO THAT POOR SPACE MARINE!?

WE NEED SOME BACKUP HERE!

OH FUCK, WE'RE GONNA DIE!


BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA


/tg/ Troll:

I love to shitpost!

I love to laugh at you!

I love my porn dumps!

Nude elven slave wat du

I love the whole board!

And all its stupid threads!


BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA


Imperial Guard:

I love my lasgun

I love the Commissar

I love the xenos

And their blue tit -*BLAM*


BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA


Adeptus Mechanicus:

I love the Admech

I love Machine Spirits

I love the Titans

And taking S.T.C's

I love Omnissiah

And all the servitors


1000010010011110100111101001101001000000100010001000101001000000101100101000001010001000100000100100000 1000010010011110100111101001101001000000100010001000101001000000101100101000001010001000100000100100000 1000010010011110100111101001101001000000100010001000101001000000101100101000001010001000100000100100000


Nurgle:

I love my cultists

I love to make disease

I love my Isha

I love all the plague fleas

I love concocting

Disease and rank decay


BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA


RPGfags:

I love my Shadowrun!

I love my Pathfinder!

I love to roll dem dice!

I love my Spellbinder!

I love the whole board!

And all its players too!


BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA


Slaneesh:

I love all excess

Excess is what I do

Excesssive lettterrrsss

Excessive rhyming too

Excessive timing

Or meter, as some might like to refer to it


BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA


Necrons:

...

...

...

...

...

...


(BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA)


Ahriman:

I love my knowledge

I love ancient magic

I love the webway

And how I walk right in

I love my legion

Sorry about that thing


BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YACA


Genestealers:

I loved the emprah

His word was highest law

I love the Hive Mind

RIP AND TEAR with my claws

I love my brood kin

New masters of Mankind!


BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA


Abaddon:

I love the Dark Gods

I love my Black Crusades

I hate Ursarkar

the defeat that he evades!

I will destroy that wretch!

Cadia will be mine!


BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA


Kobold:

I love the mining

I love building the traps

I love my brethren

And our delightful yaps

I love our dungeon

It's such a comfy place


BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA


Mary Sue:

I love myself duh

I love some people too,

But I am the best

At every thing I do!

And you love me now

Because I'm Mary Sue


BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA


3.5 fag:

I love the templates

I love the easy rules

I love the flame wars

'Cause 4e is for fools!

I love 3.5

It is all that I play


BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA


Chaos Undivided:

We love our mortals

We love our terror eye

We hate the corpse-god

But soon he too will die

We're undivided

We want your mind and soul


BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA


Fortress Dwarves:

I love the mining

I love the sweet deathtraps

I love plump helmets

And all those qt cats

I love my Armok

Blood for the God of Blood!


BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA


I love my anvil

I love my magma pools

I love to kill elves

'cuz fuck those knife-eared fools

I love my fortress

and all the burning cats


BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA


Pvt. Linda Redshirt and soldier:

"I hate this planet

I hate my whole platoon"

"Look on the bright side

At least the coffee's good"

"That is the reason

I've yet to kill you all"


BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA


Failbaddon:

I love despoiling

I love causing harm

I love blaspheming

I love both my clawed ar-

That joke is so old

I fucking hate you all


BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA


C. S. Goto:

I love my eldar

I love multilasers

I love... multilasers...

...

...

...


MULTILASERS MULTILASERS MULTILASERS MULTILASERS


Generic Cyberpunk Soldier:

I love my corp, man

I love the way they work

I love the fighting

And that I'll kill some jerk

I love cyberware

And all the 'punky things


BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA


Emprasque:

I LOVE MY DOMAIN

I LOVE MY CHILDREN TOO

I HAVE TO SAVE IT

IT'S THE FIRST THING I DO

BUT I'M NOT A GOD

PLEASE STOP WORSHIPING ME


BOOM DE YADDA BOOM DE YADDA BOOM DE YADDA BOOM DE YADDA


Konrad Curze:

I love the darkness

I love hunting my prey

I love my bat wings

They really don't look gay

I love my raptors

But fuck the chaos gods


BOOM DE YADDA BOOM DE YADDA BOOM DE YADDA BOOM DE YADDA


Marneus Calgar:

I love blue armor

I love our powerfists

I love the Codex

And all of its dictates

I love avatars

And smashing them to bits


BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA


Xeno:

I love my scarabs

I love my quiet friends

I love this song too!

I hope it never ends!

I love you /tg/

Without you I'd be blue.


BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA


Monstergirl Fetishist:

I love this fetish

/tg/ has the best kinks

Other boards just stare

But who cares what they think?

I love this whole board

We're weirder than /d/


BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA


Magnus the Red:

I crave all knowledge

I love my sorcery

I love the Emprah

I'm serving loyally

Watch out for Horus

OH FUCK IT'S THE SPACE YIFFS


BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA


Trazyn the Infinite:

I love my doubles

I love collecting things

I love Valeria

I love the gifts she brings

I love the galaxy

and all its rarities


BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA


/tg/:

I love the writefags

I love the RPGs

I love the troll threads

I love the energy

I love the whole board

It is the one for me


BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA

BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA

BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA BOOM DE YADA


The False Emperor[edit]

(Spngebob Squarepants Theme)

Are ya ready cultists?

(Ay ay master!)

I can't hear you!

(Ay ay master!!)


OOOOOOOOHHHHHHH


Who sits on the golden throne dead as can be?

(The false Emperor!)

No good, a weakling, a false god he be!

(The false Emperor!)

If glory and power be sometime you wish!

(The false Emperor!)

Then pledge to Nurgle or maybe Slaanesh!

The false Emperor!

The false Emperor!

The false Emp-eror!

The Twelve Days of Nidmas[edit]

On the first day of Nidmas the hivemind gave to me, a gargoyle on a spore tree.

On the second day of Nidmas the hivemind gave to me, two biovores and gargoyle on a spore tree.

On the third day of Nidmas the hivemind gave to me, three spore mines, two biovores and a gargoyle on a spore tree.

On the fourth day of Nidmas the hivemind gave to me, four harridans, three spore mines, two biovores and a gargoule on a spore tree.

On the fith day of Nidmas the hivemind gave to me five termagants, four harridans, three spore mines, two biovores and a gargoyle on a spore tree.

On the sixth day of Nidmas the hivemind gave to me, Six 'stealers stealing, five termagants, four harridans, three spore, mines two biovores and a gargoyle on a spore tree.

On the seventh day of nidmas the hivemind gave to me, seven lictors leaping, six 'stealers stealing, five termagants, four harridans, three spore mines, two biovores and a gargoyle on a spore tree.

On the eighth day of nidmas the hivemind gave to me, eight rippers ripping, seven lictors leapind, six 'stealers stealing, five termagants, four harridans, three spore mines, two biovores and a gargoyle on a spore tree.

On the ninth day of nidmas the hivemind gave to me, nine 'fexes screeching, eight rippers ripping, seven lictors leaping, six 'stealers stealing, five termagants, four harridans, three spore mines, two biovores and a gargoyle on a spore tree.

On the tenth day of nidmas the hivemind gave me, ten spine gaunts shooting, nine 'fexes screeching, eight rippers ripping, seven lictors leaping, six 'stealers stealing, five termagants, four harridans, three spore mines, two biovores and a gargoyle on a spore tree.

On the eleventh day of nidmas the hiveming gave to me, eleven mawlocks digging, ten spine gaunts shooting, nine 'fexes screeching, eight rippers ripping, seven lictors leaping, six 'stealers stealing, five termagants, four harridans three spore mines, two biovores and a gargoyle on a spore tree.

On the twelth day of nidmas the hivemind gave to me, twelve zoanthropes zapping, eleven mawlocks digging, ten spine gaunts shooting, nine 'fexes screeching, eight rippers ripping, seven lictors leaping, six 'stealers stealing, five termagants, four harridans, three spore mines, two biovores and a gargoyle on a spore tree.

Blood Bowl (to the tune of the theme from Coach)[edit]

Come on down and play some Blood Bowl
Get out your dice and have a roll
Nuffle's a vengeful god, we know
No matter what, you never know how it'll go

Let the blood lust consume your soul
Performance enhancers take their toll
Whether you win, whether you lose
Whatever plays that you may choose
All the fans want is Blood-
-Bowl!

Down to the stadium we'll stroll
To watch the Elves and Orks and Trolls
As they all scramble for the goal
While ripping each other and themselves all full of holes

So join us for every pass and throw
And every last bone breaking blow
Every kick, every touchdown
Violence and gore, round after round
It's all right inside the Blood Bowl!

The Call(to the tune of of the song of the same name)[edit]

Echoes from the Istvaan
Great hammers will fall
Under rocket torn skys all will
Answer the call

Strike from the sky
Ravens of yore
All faces turn now to war

Lord of the ash
Fight through crimson glow
Wolves of the north
Howl your cry's of the snow
Knights of Angels dark
Fight beside your brothers right

Bring us the strength
Of metal and of Mars
Heresy is rising!

War will weather the souls of the lost
Stand together whatever the cost
Shields will falter and many will fall
Time has come for us all
To answer the call

Pride of Inwit shore
Guard the Fortress of the king
Children of Macragge
May your bolter's eternally sing
Lords of blooded sky's
May your contrails burn bight

Bring us the Skulls
Of the hunted and slain
Shadows darken the Imperium's lands

War will weather the souls of the lost
Stand together whatever the cost
Shields will falter and many will fall
Time has come for us all
To answer the call

White gold
Burning sky
(For the souls of the lost)
Purify

War will weather the souls of the lost
Stand together whatever the cost
Shields will falter and many will fall
Time has come for us all
To answer the call

Amon Amarth: The Pursuit of Vikings[edit]

The warming sun returns again,
And melts away the snow,
The Sea of Claws free from icy chains,
Winter is letting go,

Standing on the ocean's side,
We can hear the waves,
Calling us out with tides,
To sail into our fate,

KHORNE! Guide our ships!
Our axes, spears and swords!
Guide us through storms that whip,
And in brutal WAR!

Our ships await us by the shore,
Time has come to leave,
Our country, families and homes,
For glory in setting south to torch,

Some of us wont return,
But that wont bring us down,
Our fate lies written in the web,
Woven by the Raven God,

A thrall is sacrificed,
Across the longship's bow,
And as we set our sails,
The Winds of Chaos begin to blow,

It carries out to sea,
With waking dreams of slaughter and pride,
And glorious all will be,
That with sword in hand will die!

KHORNE! Guide our ships!
Our axes, spears and swords!
Guide us through storms that whip,
And in brutal WAR!

KHORNE! Guide our ships!
Our axes, spears and swords!
Guide us through storms that whip,
And in brutal WAR!

Amon Amarth: Valhalla Awaits Me[edit]

Blood gushes from the wound,
The cut is wide and deep,
Right before he turns around,
He falls to his knees

A clear song rings in the blade,
As steel meets hardened steel,
I hear the sound of shattered wood,
A sword cuts through my shield,

I drop the shield and grab my axe,
A weapon in each hand,
A clear blow makes the helmet crack,
My axe cuts to the teeth!

I rip the axe from his skull,
Covered in blood and gore,
Leave the body lying dead,
Ready to kill some more,

My sword carves through flesh and bone,
Like a hot knife cuts through snow,
I smile when the bastard screams,
When I twist my sword,

SWORD! IN MY HAND!
AXE! ON MY SIDE!
KHORNE'S HALLS AWAIT ME!
SOON! I WILL DIE!

SWORD! IN MY HAND!
AXE! ON MY SIDE!
KHORNE'S HALLS AWAIT ME!
SOON! I WILL DIE!

BEAR-SKINS ON MY BACK!
WOLF'S JAW ON MY HEAD!
KHORNE'S HALLS AWAIT ME!
WHEN I'M DEAD!

I raise my axe up above my head,
My eyes stare in furious rage,
Yet more blood will be shed,
This is a victorious day!

Blood gushes from the wound,
The cut is wide and deep,
Right before I turn around,
I fall to my knees,

SWORD! IN MY HAND!
AXE! ON MY SIDE!
KHORNE'S HALLS AWAIT ME!
SOON, I WILL DIE!

SWORD! IN MY HAND!
AXE! ON MY SIDE!
KHORNE'S HALLS AWAIT ME!
SOON, I WILL DIE!

BEAR-SKINS ON MY BACK!
WOLF'S JAW ON MY HEAD!
KHORNE'S HALLS AWAIT ME!
WHEN I'M DEAD!

Horrible Histories: LITERALLY! (The Viking Song)[edit]

Valkia the Bloody:
Was the summer of Sigmarzeit 2293,
When we sailed 'cross the great north sea,

Norscan Marauder:
Twin-tailed comet trailing 'cross the skies that night,
Ya should have known somethin' wasn't right,

Valkia the Bloody:
We arrived 'pon the Nordland shore,
And you offered friendship,
But we'd rather kill you for Khorne,
Yes, kill you for Khorne, woah, woah!

Chorus:
WE'RE TEARING UP THIS PLACE TONIGHT!
LITERALLY!
WE'E GONNA SET THIS LITTLE PROVINCE ALIGHT!
LITERALLY!

Valkia the Bloody:
We'll kill and steal,
Burn and drink,
'Cause us Norscans don't care what you think,
Woah, woah, woah!

Valkia and Marauder:
Let us in, wont you please?
We're here to raid your Count's cities,
We're primed and ready to attack,
And we love how southlings try vainly to fight back,
You'll die or become a slave to me,
Though at times our slaves get chucked into the sea,
When the boat's heavy, yeah, yeah!

Chorus:
YOU'RE GONNA LOSE YOUR HEAD, MY FRIEND!
LITERALLY!
ITS GONNA END UP ON KHORNE'S THRONE IN THE END!
LITERALLY!

Valkia the Bloody:
And I'll drink a toast from your skull,
'Cause we're Norscans!
That's how we roll!
Woah, woah, woah,

Valkia: Play that axe, Ragnar!

guitar solo*

Chorus:
WE'RE GONNA PAINT THE WHOLE TOWN RED!
LITERALLY!
WITH THE BLOOD OF THE DEAD!
LITERALLY!

Valkia:
We'll kill you and take all you own,
Get on our ships, go back home,
Woah woah woah,
We're goin' home,
Woah, woah, woah,
We're goin' home...

Monorail (the simpsons)[edit]

  • Crpytek: Well, sir, there's nothing on earth
  • Like a genuine,
  • Bona fide,
  • Electrified,
  • Six-gun
  • Monorail!
  • What'd I say?
  • Necron 2xh5: Monorail!
  • Crpytek: What's it called?
  • Necron 45rg + 55rg: Monorail!
  • Crpytek: That's right! Monorail!
  • [crowd chants `Monorail' softly and rhythmically]
  • Necron 6h45: I hear those things are awfully loud...
  • Crpytek: It glides as softly as a cloud.
  • Necron h744: Is there a chance the track could bend?
  • Crpytek: Not on your life, my flayed friend.
  • Necron kr86: What about us brain-dead slobs?
  • Crpytek: You'll be given cushy jobs.
  • Necron 7j4f: Were you sent here by the devil?
  • Crpytek: No, good sir, I'm on the level.
  • Necron j68g: The trigger came off my tesla gun.
  • Crpytek: Take my guass blaster, my good man.
  • I swear it's Springfield's only choice...
  • Throw up your hands and raise your voice!
  • All: Monolith!
  • Crpytek: What's it called?
  • All: Monolith!
  • Crpytek: Once again...
  • All: Monolith!
  • Homverlady: But Main Street's still all cracked and broken...
  • Lord: Sorry, Mom, the mob has spoken!
  • All: Monolith!
  • Monolith!
  • Monolith!
  • [big finish]
  • Monolith!
  • Homverlord: Mono... D'oh!

Men of Cadia(Men of Harlech)[edit]

Tongues of fire from The Eye flaring,
news of Chaos near declaring,
to heroic deeds of daring,
call you Cadians

Groans of wounded civies dying,
wails of 'tillery shrapnel flying,
others in their fox-holes crying,
for you Cadians

Shall the Warp winds wailing
now be unavailing
to us who have never yet
in battles hour were failing

This our answer guns are pouring
swift as winter torrents roaring
not in vain their vox imploring
calls on Cadians

Loud the Commissars are shouting
every manly heart is bounding
as our colonel we surrounding
march we Cadians

Short the sleep the Traitors taking
ere the morrows dawn is breaking
they shall have a rude awakening
roused by Cadians.

Gov'ner cease your weeping
Calm may be your sleeping,
your planet in safety now
The Cadians are keeping.

Ere the Emprah high in heaven
Alien and mutie, panic riven,
shall like Heretic sheep be driven
far, by, Ca-di-ans.

Turisas: The March of the Imperial Guard (The March of the Varagian Guard)[edit]

The sun rose ove the wasteland
As far as the eye can see
Regiments fill the vast waste plains of this world
It's avian predators jeering at me

But they can circle until they drop dead
I have not come this far
To end, but to pursure my own thread
To join the Imperial Guard!

Guards of glory and of might
Hard as steel and strong as brass
Flies our banners as we march
Across the galaxy, for the God-Emperor of Mankind

There's men of Cadia and Valhalla
A few of Tallarn
Men simply searching for glamour
Some concealing their royal descent

The Emperor's hammer they have aptly named us
All we've come from afar
Diversity is what unites us
We are the Imperial Guard!

Guards of glory and of might
Hard as steel and strong as brass
Flies our banners as we march
Across the galaxy, for the God-Emperor of Mankind

Eastern Fringe, Segmentum Ultima
In the 41st millenium of the imperial date.

To the Ghoul Stars and beyond
This is where Segmentum Command have us sent
For fame and for gold
We once set the warp for these worlds unknown

Guards of glory and of might
Hard as steel and strong as brass
Flies our banners as we march
Across the galaxy, for the God-Emperor of Mankind

Grand Gathas Of Tzeentch (Grand Gathas Of Baal Sin)[edit]

GRAND TZEENTCH, BRINGERS OF MAGICK!

Grand Tzeentch, bringer of magick
Stun the norm, sublime ideas
Builders of restless towers
They grow to reach the Immaterium

NINE... Nine daemons wreak havok
NINE... Nine sorcerors ever defiant

Reconstruction of the golden age
Guided by winged feathered sages
Metaphoric mirage of the ideal
Materialize the spoken word

NINE... Nine daemons wreak havok
NINE... Nine sorcerors ever defiant

Under the eye of Magnus
And all the wise
All the lords of changes
With their liquid souls we're baptized
Tzeentch!
Caliphates of the truth
Ahriman fee ein Il'adoo

Polymaths are the ones who question
Polymaths are the ones who hear
Immaterium voices scream
Awake and march to the next domain

Under the eye of Magnus
And all the wise
All the lords of change
We're baptized with their liquid souls

Bringers of shadows
Shun the mask
That mask the illusion of the mass

Grand Tzeentch, bringer of magick
Stun the norm, sublime ideas
Builders of restless towers
They grow to reach the immaterium

NINE... Nine daemons wreak havok
NINE... Nine sorcerors ever defiant

Magnus!
Tzeentch!

You Win or You Die (game of throne theme song)[edit]

The Eagle grasps what it can to preserve it's peace.

The Dragon consumes all before it in the East,

(Chorus)

A cold golden throne, holds a man centauries old,

A galaxy laced in lies,

You win or you die,

The Four bides there time in the great eye,

The Daughters must pay the warriors toll,

(Chorus)

A cold golden throne, holds a man centauries old,

A galaxy laced in lies,

You win or you die,

The ancients seek for purpose among there ruins

The youngest, await for there time to rise

(Chorus)

A cold golden throne, holds a man centauries old,

A galaxy laced in lies,

You win or you die

See Also[edit]

External Links[edit]