Cronos Parasite Engine

From 1d4chan
I have seen enough Hentai to kno-wait you know what? Fuck this. NOPE. NOPE. NOPE. NOPE. NOPE!

The Cronos Parasite Engine, often shortened to the Cronos, is a variety of "oh god what the fuck!?" biological machines known as Pain Engines. They, alongside their brethren, the Talos Pain Engine, are one of the darkest and most sick fuck of all sick fuck abominations created by the Dark Eldar. Chaos wishes it could be this fucking nasty.


The Cronos are semi-sentient, part organic and part mechanical monsters that slowly drift along on anti-gravitic motors. Created by the Haemonculi through a strange blend of alchemy and science, the Cronos drains away not only the physical constituents of its victims but also their life essence - what little is left of its unfortunate victim is a pathetic shriveled husk which quickly collapses to little more than dust, hence why they are called Parasite Engines.

The majority of the Cronos soul-sucking vampiric weapons are such, that it uses their life force as literal fuel to power their arcane abilities. For example, their multiple combat tentacles leech the essence of their prey which then travels within the Cronos and invigorates itself in the process. Alternatively, similar to the Medusae, the Cronos acts like money trees, in which the stolen vitality of the machine’s victim is then magnified within its shiny carapace, fed through its ribbed capacitor called the Spirit Vortex-valves and projected from its resonator vanes once more. The effects of which is like that of a psychic pulse of pure spirit juice - nourishing and rejuvenating any DEldar standing near the Cronos. Usually that DEldar is its Haemonculus master and his petting zoo creatures from Hell.

It is this ability that has led the superstitious denizens of the Imperium to refer to the Cronos as ‘time-thieves’, for they steal youth and vigor from their prey and gift it to their keepers. The DEldar who drank all the ghostly Kool-Aid promptly becomes stronk and powerful. No wonder the higher ups in Commorragh wants these guys so bad.

They are often armed with a plethora of hooks to chains, to the numerous segmented weapons that drains the life out of their victims such as the Spirit Probe, Spirit-Leech Tentacles, chain-flails, ichor injectors, a Liquifier Gun, syringes and adrenaline boosters. And no, they are too fucked to be even be included in /d/...yeah, it's that bad.

Forces of the Dark Eldar
Command: Archons - Haemonculi - Kabalite Trueborn
Lhamaeans - Medusae - Sslyth - Succubi
Troops: Beastmasters - Commorragh Slaves - Grotesques
Hellions - Incubi - Kabalite Warriors - Mandrakes
Scourges - Wracks - Wyches
Beasts: Clawed Fiend - Khymerae - Razorwing Flock - Ur-Ghul
Pain Engines: Cronos Parasite Engines - Talos Pain Engines
Vehicles: Raider - Ravager - Reaper - Reaver Jetbike - Venom
Flyers: Raven Fighter - Razorwing Jetfighter
Voidraven Bomber
Spacecraft: Impaler Assault Module - Raptor Fighter
Slavebringer Assault Boat
Super Heavies: Tantalus
Auxiliaries: Harlequins