Eldrad

From 1d4chan
Jump to: navigation, search
AIAaward.gif This article is awesome. Do not fuck it up.
Helmetless Eldrad, looking suspiciously like Mon'Keigh actor Hugo Weaving. What are the odds? 5 to 1 that GW gets sued again in the near future.

Eldrad Ulthran is renowned as the most powerful psyker of an entire race of powerful psykers, the Eldar, and was the Chief Farseer of Craftworld Ulthwé. He is awfully fond of engaging in overly elaborate plots to tweak the balance of fate, presumably to preserve the Eldar as a species. Also, he engages in only the highest forms of dickishness, as the accounts from one of his retinue warlocks attest. Possibly father to Farseers Taldeer and Macha. Love Can Bloom is ambiguous on the matter, but current /tg/ canon operates on the assumption that he is.

Some time ago, Abaddon the Despoiler led an assault on craftworld Ulthwé, to attack the Eldar Farseer Council there. After slowly slogging through the Craftworld while his Black Legion suffered massive casualties as the Eldar picked them off in hit and run attacks, Abaddon finally got to the council, but found Eldrad waiting for him. Eldrad quickly made a mockery of Abaddon's combat skill; he dodged Abaddon's strikes with the daemon sword Drach'nyen and the Talon of Horus with ease. In just two strikes, Eldrad cleaved through Abaddon's Terminator armor with virtually no effort and separated him from his arms. The Eldar then stuffed the remainder of the attack force into a Dreadclaw with "Failbaddon the Armless Failboat" as well as other demeaning terms and images painted all over it and launched it back into the Eye of Terror while laughing hysterically. And that is why Abaddon has no arms.

As of the 13th Black Crusade, Eldrad is getting more active. After stealing the crystallized bodies of Farseers from every Craftworld, he attempted to prematurely summon Ynnead, the yet-to-be-born Eldar god of Death who would save them from Slaanesh before every single Eldar dies, which was when it was supposed to be born. When the Deathwatch intervened in the Battle of Port Demesnus, Eldrad was forced to flee, marking one of many times he himself was out-dicked by Space Marines. Said summoning required the bodies of every Crystal Seer, and when Ulthwe's Seer Council learned of it, only the intervention of the Ynnari and the Harlequins saved him from being executed. Instead, he was then was exiled from the Craftworld on pain of death if he returned.

Currently a member of the Ynnari, joining their quest to bring forth Ynnead in its full power with the Croneswords. He is one of the Eldar that guided the survivors of Cadia on Kalisus to Macragge to ressurect Roboute Guilliman. In this way, the fates of two most prominent dicks in the galaxy intwined.

He used to be presumed dead, eaten by Slaanesh during the 13th Black Crusade. He got better in 6th edition.

History[edit]

Early Life[edit]

The only thing known of Eldrad's life, before becoming trapped on the path of the Seer, was that he used to be a musician, and apparently still has quite an ear for that kind of stuff. Although he is most well-known as the High Farseer of Ulthwe, he did not begin that way, and his time on the Seer Council of Ulthwe was a surprisingly violent one.

Whilst he served on the Seer Council, but before actually becoming its High Farseer, Eldrad had a bizarre tendency to get his female superiors killed on missions, often just as a Phoenix Lord arrived. This occured twice in the days before the Great Crusade, first when Eldrad and an older female Farseer journeyed with Asurmen to try to find a legendary Exodite Oracle. Said Oracle, believed to have been the first Eldar to ever forsee the Fall, turned out to be a Keeper of Secrets in disguise and, in the ensuing fight, killed Eldrad's superior. This pattern was repeated when Jain Zar visited the Craftworld, advising it against attacking a nascent Ork Waaagh, which the Crafworld's, at the time, most senior Farseer agreed with. Eldrad, however, wanted to attack and destroy said Waaagh, convincing the Craftworld to follow him and rousing the Avatar of Khaine. Despite all this the attack was a total failure, with the High Farseer dying, the Avatar of Khaine being destroyed (in one of its earliest defeats) and Eldrad himself almost being killed. In the end it was only because Jain Zar decided to intervene that the entire attack didn't fail. In the aftermath, though, despite his colossal cock up (the first of a career of failures), Eldrad's arrogance continued to rub Jain Zar the wrong way, and he refused to allow the former High Farseer's Spirit Stone into the Infinity Circuit, deciding he could make better use of it personall (which probably means it just got chucked into his big collecion of tokens).

Were these simple coincidences or Eldrad's way of conniving his way to the top by ensuring his superiors all met with tragic fates? The answer to that probably depends on how much of a dick, and how competent, you think Eldrad is, although it is true that one skill he certainly has is getting other Eldar killed, in many ways Eldrad is the most successful murderer of Eldar since Slaanesh.

Horus Heresy and later[edit]

After ascending to the position of High Farseer Eldrad would try to interfere in the course of the Horus Heresy a few times, rarely to much success. First he attempted to warn Fulgrim of Horus' corruption but failed, costing the life of one of Ulthwe's greatest Wraithlords and his friend, and also seeing the Avatar of Khaine slain yet again on his watch when Fulgrim throttled it (one assumes that Ulthwe's Seer Council has become a bit suspect about letting Eldrad use the Avatar since he seems to always come back with it broken). He aided John Grammaticus and Vulkan, making clear also that he opposed the plan of the Cabal. Said opposition went so far he even killed the entire Cabal eventually. Apparently, according to him, at some point he and Vulkan did something together (with Eldrad disguising himelf as an old man representing Mount Deathfire to guide Vulkan towards Terra) which resulted in Vulkan giving him a Salamander's tooth, probably to join the huge collection of knick-nacks Eldard has along with the former High Farseer's Spiritstone.

Following the Heresy Eldrad next interfered in the affairs of the Galaxy when he and the Seers of Ulthwe allowed a group of Harlequins to infiltrate the Imperial Palace during the height of the War of the Beast. It is not exactly clear what he hoped to gain from this, as the Harlequins butchered the palace guards as greetings before being annihilated by Custodians save one and the only message she delivered was to say that Chaos was the real threat, whilst Orks were literally moments away from destroying Terra, so its not clear how any of this really helped anyone. Maybe he really wanted those Harlequins dead and this was, somehow, the best way to do it. Or, the more plausible theory, Eldrad is just really bad at getting things done.

Since then Eldrad has been involved in a few events; he saved Saim-hann from a Hrud infestation, tried to forewarn Iyanden of the invasion of the Tyranids, defeated the Ork Warboss Nazdreg and also took part in the battle of Blood and Tears. He seemed particularly invested in the small Craftworld of Idharae, engineering the entire 2nd War of Armageddon to save said Craftworld, although it amounted to nothing in the end as the Invaders Space Marine Chapter simply destroyed Idharae instead. So much for that.

Indeed Eldrad has a poor reputation when facing off against Space Marines, beginning with his battle against Fulgrim. On Maedrax the Ulthwe forces under his direction were mauled by a single Blood Angels Battle Barge and failed in their mission to stop an awakening Necron Dynasty. He has had more luck when working with Space Marines, such as when he interfered to save Blood Angels Chief Librarian Mephiston. As the future would show Eldrad's true calling is as a lickspittle for Space Marines.

Gathering Storm[edit]

In many ways it was Eldrad, along with Abaddon, who started the whole set of events which have lead to the changes beginning in the Gathering Storm. Showcasing his extreme level of dickishness Eldrad stole Crystal Seers (remains of past Seers, which obviously contain a lot of psychic fuel to awaken a god) from every single Craftworld and endangered the entire Eldar species in an abortive attempt to awaken Ynnead which failed when Deathwatch Captain Artemis, through his superior precognition, beat him and his Harlequin associates. Rather than a full awakening only a shard of Ynnead stirred, settling within Yvraine, and beginning the entire Fracture of Biel-tan storyline.

Since his act of incredible treason, Eldrad has been involved in aiding the Ynnari. He has also been removed from the Seer Council of Ulthwe, instead now moving with a small roving group of followers, interfering where he sees fit, and taking missions from the Primarch Roboute Guilliman. At least he recognizes that following the guidance of someone millions of times more intelligent than himself (because Spiritual Liege) and of god-like competence is an excellent idea. Yep, Eldrad's big calling in life is to do what a Space Marine tells him to. He did return to aid his home when it was invaded by Kairos Fateweaver though, assisting them in banishing an attempt by Daemons of Tzeentch to attack the Craftworld.

Explanation[edit]

Where did Eldrad’s reputation for being such a dick come from?

"i am the incarnate of A MASSIVE DICK" -eldrad's personal war chant.

He gives candy to young races.

And that candy will contain a slow-spreading gingivitis bacteria that will fester in the new race and slowly spread amongst their entire species. The gum pain will be considered a normal part of everyday life, and they will regularly take painkillers.

When the ’Nids invade them in 3000 years, they too will be infected by the gingivitis disease—but they are mindless beasts, who know nothing of painkillers. Living in constant pain, only worsened by eating, this massive hive of ’Nids will starve and become extinct, a result of their own adaptation abilities.

And of course, Craftworld Ulthwé would have been the next target for that particular hive to eat. Just. As. Planned.

And that is why Eldrad is a dick. There is only one mortal being in 40k who is a bigger dick than Eldrad.

Current Activities[edit]

As of 8th edition, and his exile, Eldrad is pulling old strings while fighting alongside the Ynnari, and at the beck and call of the Imperium. His devotion to the Imperium goes so far that he opposes the White Seers, the leaders of the Black Library itself, in favour of doing as told to be Roboute. Existing much like a Corsair fleet, Eldrad and his renegades now travel the galaxy, regularly offering sage wisdom or aid to those who fight against the overwhelming forces of Chaos(or occasionally getting into the fray himself, like during the War in the Labyrinth). Despite his exile when Daemonic forces invade the defenceless Ulthwé (due to Ulthwe sending its entire force to every corner of the galaxy in order to fight Chaos), Eldrad returned and kicked some major Chaos arse.

He also turns out to be a bit of a hoarder, with whole towers stuffed with all manner of strange nik naks and other totally pointless items, gifted to him over his long life, that he was apparently too polite to refuse but too lazy to dispose of (what a dick).

Yvraine has taken to making fun of him because of his old age. I tell you, these youngsters today, have absolutely no respect for their “Eldars”.

This Dick On the Tabletop[edit]

Be sure to highlight the dickishness when painting him.
Pts WS BS S T W I A Ld Sv
Eldrad Ulthran: 195 5 5 3 4 3 5 1(2) 10 -/3++

Eldrad is probably THE mainstay special character for Eldar armies. As we all know, the dude is rivaled as a (non-cheese) psychic powerhouse only by Ahzek Ahriman: he's got Mastery Level 4, meaning that if you go for Psychic Focus and roll on a single table, you've got access to every power on there except for one (something his Tzeentchian peer can only do with the Tzeentch discipline since he has to generate at least one power from it). He knows Sanctic Daemonology, Telepathy, Divination, and, of course, Runes of Fate. Whereas Ahriman is all about the volume when it comes to mind bullets, Eldrad is all about stability and reliability. He has the usual Farseer toys: Runes of the Farseer, which allows him to re-roll once per turn any number of dice on a psychic test or a Deny the Witch test, and a Ghosthelm, which allows him to spend a warp charge to nullify a wound caused by Perils of the Warp. So like any Farseer, he's already much less likely than other psykers to get turned inside out by daemons or to have his powers fizzle out, even when casting big WC3 stuff. Furthermore, his staff gives him a 33% chance to generate an extra warp charge every time he successfully casts a power; so not only does he have those 4-5 powers, but he's usually got the charges to use all of them.

Besides his psychic prowess, Eldrad also has some nifty wargear. Armour of the Last Runes gives him a 3++ Invulnerable save, which, coupled with his T4, allows him to take more punishment than the average Farseer, though his resilience still isn't anything to write home to Craftworld Ulthwé about. He's got a shuriken pistol (always good to have a Bladestorm weapon handy, and it's an extra close combat attack), a witchblade (Fleshbane! Always wounds on 2+), and let's not forget his all-important psyker disco stick, the Staff of Ulthamar, which is S-User (which doesn't really matter), AP3 AND has Fleshbane and Force. Anything he hits with it gets wounded on 2+, probably doesn't get an armor save, and dies instantly if you activate Force. Enough said. Oh, and his special rules are Fleet, Ancient Doom, Independent Character, Battle Focus, and Psyker. Naturally, his Warlord Trait is An Eye on Distant Events—because, you see, Eldrad is a dick.

Gallery[edit]

Famous Eldar
Heroes: Eldrad Ulthran - Illic Nightspear - Prince Yriel - Yvraine
Phoenix Lords: Asurmen - Baharroth - Drastanta - Fuegan
Irillyth - Jain Zar - Karandras - Maugan Ra
From Dawn of War I: Farseer Caerys - Farseer Macha - Farseer Taldeer
From Dawn of War II: Autarch Kayleth - Farseer Elenwe - Farseer Idranel
Ranger Ronahn - Warlock Veldoran