Justice Hobos

From 1d4chan

Jake? Jaaaaaaaake!
Whzzfrmg... nuh, i dun do blowjobs nomore... frmmmzzzzz
JAKE! Wake up muthfugger! You see that?
I'm aw-w-w-WANKER awake. You talking about that lizard in the business s-s-SHITCOCK suit?
Yeah! What's he doin' under our bridge? Is- is that a baby he's got?
I told you about the lizards, but you j-j-j-JACKOFF! Just thought I was drunk.

On a lonely planet spinning its way to damnation amid the fear and despair of a broken human race, who is left to fight for all that is good and pure and gets you smashed for under a fiver?

In Justice Hobos the players are a group of hobos who, in pursuit of small change and discount alcohol, have wandered into the middle of a conspiracy. Maybe. Being outside the system only they can see the people being controlled. Everyone thinks they're crazy, maybe because they are, but even the lowest of the low gotta stand up for what's right.

Inspired by "The Surprising Adventures of Sir Digby Chicken Caeser" https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oM3mmNwhT9A


Every hobo has a name, something people call them, which is unlikely to be given at birth. Every hobo also has two Quirks, somethings that make them unpleasant to be around, (e.g.: awful stench, nasal whiny voice, slimy skin secretions, ...)

Fat John lives up to his name. He's Morbidly Obese and Always Wheezing.

The referee for the game is known just as "the Big Man/Madam," or BM for short.

The System[edit]

The group needs a collection of drinks, either bottles or cans. When players finish a drink, they keep the cap or pull-tab and add it to their "cap pool." They start the game with one cap from their first drink, and get another for every drink they finish during the game session.

Whenever a hobo faces a challenge and could fail, that player will throw their caps against something. Every cap that lands face up is a success. Most tasks need only one success, but harder challenges may need more, as decided by the session's BM. When hobos oppose each other, both players throw their caps and the one with more successes wins. If there's a stalemate, they both lose.

Hobos can invoke their Quirks to give them an extra success, if they narrate how their disgusting personal qualities can be used to aid their efforts.

Swampy Pete almost gets stuck in the ventilation shaft, but since he Shits His Pants he has just enough lubrication to squeeze through.

Hobos and the BM have another resort to gain extra successes: take a shot. Anyone can automatically succeed at any challenge by drinking 1 fl.oz. of alcoholic drink (or a reasonable amount of their preferred form of booze). If the other side (hobo or BM) takes takes a shot, then it's back to a stalemate where both sides lose. The only way to break this tie is for someone to take another shot, but the other side can respond by taking a shot, and so on, ad vomitium. If both sides are willing to push it, the drinking contest continues until one side backs down, pukes, or dies from liver poisoning.