King of Clubs: 'Chief Thunder'

From 1d4chan

I was out in th' desert, not too long ago.. half dyin' of thirst, half blind, half crazy, half starved.. I'm about to either kick th' bucket or bite a cactus when I hear this huge boomin' sound.. Thunder I thought! Rain! I couldn't feel a drop of it though, so I' starts runnin' the way I heard it.. about then, I fall over, musta passed out.. since next thing I know, some injun was pourin' water into me mouth.

He agrees to help me to the nearest town, 'long the way, he tells me a bit abou' hisself.. says he's the chief of some dead village, his friends 'n family all dead, sad tale.. was wary of them, but still.. thing he told me..

Ah.. fergot to mention, seems barely anyone died when they were first invaded.. but, then they was carted off to slave away in some ol' mine. His people were worked t' death y'know, til he was the last one left, he worked just as hard as the others, a real turn th' other cheek kinda guy. He was the chief after all.. old injun had been happy once y'know, he goes on about the man having taken his peace and replaced it with somethin' cold an' dark..

Ah, siddown and shaddap, th' story's important!

Anyways, 'e's the last one left, and th' guy responsible for it all tells him he was worthless as a slave, and's only fit t' fall down'n die like the others. Real nasty piece'a work, goes on about wanting to kill him with a weapon just as worthless, he snatches down some shotgun, sticks it in the chief's mouth.

Click. Dun' fire. Click click click and nothing. Vicious bastard gets angry, giving up on shootin' him and just starts beatin' him with the butt like a club, holdin' it by the barrel, screaming about how useless the gun was, screamin' about how he knew th' guy who'd sold it t' him was a fraud.

Chief finally gets angry, grabs th' butt of the shotgun, and just so happens t' pull the trigger.

Wasn't so much a click as an explosion, he tells me the thing shook th' whole building, breakin' all the fancy glasses and bottles and vases, like some huge quake hit. The guy who'd been beatin' him shook worst of all he says, jus' fer a bit a'fore exploding.

About then, he shows me th' gun, was a crude thing, like someone took the most banged up bit of raingutter pipe you ever saw, slapped it it together with some wood and called it a shotgun.. It mighta been a nice enough gun once, but it looked so beaten up an' rusty you could hardly believe it would be good for anything but blowing up, with the idiot holding it. Strangest thing though, it had a king carved into the handle.. little club next to it.. Claimed it was the same gun what shook the house apart and blew that guy to paste.. I still don't rightly believe it.. but still..

That thunder I heard in the desert? Turns out there wasn't a cloud in the sky.. an' didn't see one for at least two months after I met him...Figure that one out.


Wild Cards
Spades: 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - 8 - 9 - 10 - J - Q - K - A
Hearts: 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - 8 - 9 - 10 - J - Q - K - A
Clubs: 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - 8 - 9 - 10 - J - Q - K - A
Diamonds: 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - 8 - 9 - 10 - J - Q - K - A
Jokers: Red Joker - Black Joker
Introduction - The World - Gameplay - Stories of the world
On the Attainment, Ownership and Passing of The Cards
Variant Rule: Hands