- -Da Orks, all da zoggin' time.
"War means fighting, and fighting means killing."
- – Nathan Bedford Forrest
"War is the business of barbarians."
- – Napoleon Bonaparte
"The Orks are the pinnacle of creation. For them, the great struggle is won. They have evolved a society which knows no stress or angst. Who are we to judge them? We Eldar who have failed, or the Humans, on the road to ruin in their turn. And why? Because we sought answers to questions that an Ork wouldn't even bother to ask! We see a culture that is strong and despise it as crude."
- – Uthan the Perverse, Eldar philosopher, offering an alternative perspective
"ORKZ ORKZ ORKZ ORKZ ORKZ."
- – Typical Orkish Chant
The Orks (Orkus vulgus) are a race in Warhammer 40,000. Commonly known and referred to as "Greenskins" or "the Green Tide", they're probably the most numerous and successful race in the entire 40K setting, or at the very least on par with the Tyranids. They have a Warhammer Fantasy equivalent, the only major difference being that fantasy Orks, spelled Orcs, have a (slightly) lower level of technology relative to the setting, they use teef as currency, and they have different attitudes, particularly when it comes to losing a fight. Because of Games Workshop's desire to keep all their properties under hard lockdown they are now called "Orruks" in Age of Sigmar... So we’re actually going back in time to when orcs were named Uruks.
Orks are widely considered to be the most fun faction of all for the simple reason that they are an over-the-top (even by 40k standards) bunch of happy-go-lucky misfit maniacs who like shooting shit up, chopping shit up, blowing shit up, and generally being fun-loving crazies who live for a good fight who will laugh gleefully as they overrun entire worlds laying waste and bringing about the apocalypse to everything and everyone. For them, war is just one blood-filled game and everybody is a player. Unfortunately for everyone else, they're the only ones who think this way and they don't realize it, and even when they do, they simply don't understand why other races do not condone their outlook on life. While the Codices generally meme up Orks as the comic relief faction, the novels involving them get pretty grimdark especially when it comes to their treatment of human slaves.
If Orks were summarized in one sentence, the best way to describe them would be as follows: A race of retarded, belligerent mushrooms born an hour ago that became too successful at existing and never have enough dakka.
- 1 Overview
- 2 Ork Teknologee
- 3 Special Groups of Orks
- 4 Retired Boyz
- 5 Ork Klanz
- 6 Ork Language
- 7 Everyday Life of an Ork
- 8 Reasons it Rokks to be an Ork
- 9 Reasons it sucks to be an Ork
- 10 See Also
- 11 Gallery
- 12 Navigation
Orks are the most successful race of the 41st millennium
HERESY! WHO LET DEM HUMIES IN 'ERE?! Despite their entire lack of structured education or training, they seem to be very proficient with all kinds of technology (for a given value of "proficient"), which they inevitably utilize for their armaments (of which firearms and vehicles are the most common). This is explained away in the fluff by their origins: they were created by the Old Ones to be a warrior race called the Krork, and some of them (the Mekboyz) were genetically hard-wired to have a pre-programmed proficiency for technological engineering. Unfortunately, the Old Ones died before they could finish their little science project; specifically the psychic control mechanism. This means that such war machines simply fight everything, everywhere, all the time. The ancient Krork were known to have fought the ancient Eldar empire when the latter was at the peak of its power and were implied to have been a considerable threat (a Harlequin in M32 compares the nearly invincible hordes of the Beast as being like children compared to them). The only Krork to exist in the present day (one of Trazyn's exhibits) wore exo-armour that was more sophisticated than power armour and stood 12 meters tall. In principle, Orks can loot just about anything: the minor greenskins, such as "Grotz" (goblins) can construct several working vehicles and machines out of mere scrap (They actually can't but orks believe they can so it happens anyway. see: a few paragraphs below).
The Orks derive much of their success from their reproductive process: Orks are, essentially, a psychosensitive hybrid of animal and fungi, not unlike a very complex version of a lichen, save that it's all the same organism. One advantage is a redundancy of vital organs, making them able to easily survive events such as head transplants; it's not easy to kill an individual Ork since they could very well shrug off injuries that would cripple a human. In fact there is a Valhallan folktale about a relative finding an Ork and thawing it out only for it to attempt to kill them. Another advantage is their ability to grow larger as they win more battles (due to the aforementioned psychosensitivity): an Ork who is winning a fight is enjoying himself, which causes fluctuations in the gestalt field that all Orks generate. These fluctuations supercharge the Ork's physiology, causing the Ork to gain muscle mass and evolve. Consequently, if an Ork should somehow be incapable of fighting (like being imprisoned), they will actually devolve instead, causing the Ork to become pudgy and lethargic. This was observed during Xenology where a captive Ork was eventually found morbidly obese when the Inquisitor brought him out for dissection. Hence the saying "Orkz iz made fer fighten' and winnin'" applies literally in their case, as the incentives of fighten' and winnin' are what makes or breaks an Ork.
In addition, the fungal part of their physiology allows Orks to reproduce asexually en masse through underground fungal colonies that act as self-sustaining ecosystems. Reproductive spores enter the topsoil, produce fungal mycelia that assimilate base nutrients and exchange genetic information with other mycelia, putting normal Human sexual reproduction to shame; first sprouting actual Orkoid Fungi, then eventually producing lesser motile Orkoids: squigs and Grotz. The Grotz cultivate the protein-rich squigs in preparation for the emergence of the greater Orks, which take longer to develop. All in all, this cycle was designed to fight against the Necrons, which sterilized a planet to its bacteria. Orks can terraform a barren planet into a veritable paradise this way, though what defines "paradise" is a point of discussion; if you like endless wars and tribal conflicts in a mushroom rich planet, it probably is. IS YOU SAYIN' DERE'S FINGS WHAT DON'T LIKE FIGHTIN' FEREVER? DEM UMIES IS REEL GOOD AT MAKIN' FORTS FER US TA KRUMP, SO DEY MUST LIKE FIGHTIN'...
Though all Orks discharge reproductive spores throughout their lives, the most significant and numerous emissions occur when an Ork is dismembered or dies. Like all fungi, these spores benefit enormously from decaying matter to draw nutrients from... such as enemy corpses. This means that heavy bombardment or entrenched warfare against an Ork force just results in thousands to millions of new Orks, similarly to Tyranids. The concept of "blood-lust" is especially applicable to Orks, as combat effectively serves as the Ork reproductive process (with all associated hormonal incentives).
Due to this, an Ork infestation is incredibly hard to handle if kept unchecked since it won't take them long to get enough boyz to launch a full-scale WAAAGH! to overrun an entire planet and necessitate Exterminatus. We can use flamethrowers, Plasma, nukes, melta weapons or anything high-energy to eradicate any spores and fungi, saving the world from the eventual Exterminatus, but then again, efficiency ain't manly n' grimdark enough compared to good ol' spore-releasing bolters, chainswords and artillery.
Orks only have two popular combat doctrines: choppy, which involves giving your opponents a good stomping up close; and shooty, which involves spitting out as many bullets as possible with an assortment of shootas, the faster they shoot the better. That said, a good shoota should also still be able to kill enemies while putting out a lot of dakka, otherwise it wouldn't be killy (and woe betide an Ork who isn't killy). Because of the Ork's naturally low penchant for accuracy, they typically get around this problem in two methods. The first one is to have a gun that simply shoots bullets as fast as Orkilly possible so the wielder should be able to hit something eventually (strapping two or more shootas together is a crude but effective way to go about this). The second one is to make the gun really killy every time it shoots, like putting a dangerously high-explosive shell in a kannon that can obliterate an entire building in one shot.
Unlike most army doctrines, which emphasize strategic victories with minimal casualties, Orks view strategic gains as a secondhand priority, instead opting to kill more of the enemy whenever possible. Also, due to Ork biology and culture, they are not adverse to sacrificing large numbers of Orks to achieve a victory, in order to (in some cases literally) drown the enemy with their bodies. Speaking of extremely high casualties, Orks also view death of other orks as something perfectly fine, as long as it satisfies their WAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH. More death, more WAAAAAAAAAAGH, which means the Orks can be greater Orks.
Orks do not fear their own death as the Old Ones made them without that. Unfortunately, they do fear no longer being able to destroy and kill things - for an ork that is the most frightening fate. So indirectly they still lose morale when things are going south.
Orks are commonly believed to be stupid and superstitious by the other races of the 40k world, but they can also be cunning and quick on the draw. Orks are always ready for a fight and while you can trick them, they quite like the idea of tricking people back.
Their philosophy of DA RED WUNZ GO FASTA is the ultimate truth: because of the aforementioned gestalt field, Ork vehicles painted red will ultimately go faster than Ork vehicles that are not painted red, because the Orks believe that Red makes everything go faster: DIS 'UMIE GIT THINKZ DAT DA RED WUNZ DON'T GO FASTA? DEY DON'T KNOW DAT ANYFING PAINTED RED MAKES IT DA BEST AN' MAKES IT GO FASTAAAA COZ RED IZ BEST! *WHAM!* NO IT AIN'T, YA BLEEDIN' SQUIG, GREEN IZ BEST! *Boots up the bog* SHUT YER GOB, 'E WAS TALKIN' 'BOUT DA TRUKKS, YA GIT!
We can assume that this cuts both ways, with enemies such as the Blood Angels and White Scars gaining the same boost due to their use of red paint. (in fact, this is almost a universal truth: subfactions with red color schemes across 40k tend to be focused on speed and mobility, such as Saim-Hann and the Farsight enclaves.)
A hallmark of Greenskin civilization is the WAAAGH! (like "war"). A term of their oft-forgotten "true" language, deafening volume is a key part of its proper pronunciation. To this end, it is always written in all-caps, with at least three "A"s and an exclamation point. The WAAAGH! occurs when an Ork population reaches critical mass and a dominant Warboss appears. A Warboss is an Ork Alpha who is bigger than all the other Orks and has proven his right to lead by either his sheer size or krumpin' all the other big Orks that think otherwise. Lesser Orks sense the presence of the Boss in the Orks' psychic field and follow him on what is often described as a combination of pub riot and holy war with a dash of genocide. The WAAAGH! accomplishes two things: it weeds out weaker Orks, keeping the species strong; and it facilitates genetic exchange and reproduction as the Orks die and release spores.
The Ork economy is based on teef, more information on which can be found here.
Ork religious beliefs also help manage their population. Orks believe in two gods, Gork and Mork, which according to the Orks are engaged in a perpetual battle between themselves, a ditheistic belief system. One is "kunningly brutal" where the other is "brutally kunnin'", which is in itself a good summary of the Orkish race. The former (like regular Boyz) will punch anything in front of them first and only fall back on a more cunning trick if that doesn't work, while the latter (like the many Oddboyz) will try the sly trick first and only fall back on straightforward violence second. Unfortunately, no one can decide which god is which, nor can the Orks decide which is better: cunning brutality or brutal cunning. These differences of opinion tend to lead to Gigantic Brawls, yet another method of keeping the Ork race strong, warlike and in check. Their division also keeps them perpetually divided, for it has been theorized that if the Orks were to ever unite in one big WAAAGH!, their gestalt reality-warping field might just as well turn omnipotent and crush all opposition.
Beyond this internal conflict, there are groups amongst the 'outcasts' of Ork society, namely Freebooterz, that may even turn away from the worship of all things roight and orky, instead seeking patronage from the Spikey-Killy Gits, although extremely rarely. Makes you wonder if there isn't a tribe of Feral Orks out there praisin' the Emprah (See section below).
Ork society is effectively the perfect society for the 40k universe. Its society is a Kratocracy (A Government ruled by the strongest, fitting for Orks) in maturity as all disputes are settled fairly quickly and painfully (just the way they like it). The economy is steady, as teef grow and rot at a reliable rate. Once a Boss is in charge, mostly everyone falls into place, and the Orks go and get shit done.
Fun fact: The Orks use black and white on their shock troops, because it reminds them of the Luna Wolves who destroyed them at Ullanor. The Orks do not fear death, but they do fear the Luna Wolves. That is right, Horus traumatized them as a race more than the fucking grim reaper. Note: Why would you fear death, if death usually results in you being reborn into several thousands of yourself? Horus probably swept the spores up post battle and that's why they fear him. Though it's also worth mentioning that Orks harbor a natural fear of Commander Farsight too, whom they know as "Da Red Commit". But then again he was committing Ork genocide so... and of course, we can't just forget the final great fear of the Orks, Commissar Yarrick, the only normal human that can cause Orks to actively PANIC. On the other hand Yarrick, Farsight and Moon-Wolfie boyz are also considered a source of prime fighting so despite being scary they actually also attract Orks.
Ork Life Cycle
When an Ork WAAAGH's they release spores into the air (and release any remaining spores after they die). Depending on how many Orkoids are on a planet this can either be negligible to a planet's environment or kick off a terraforming (Ullanor-forming) process. The main feature generated by this process are the Spawning Shrooms. These "Shrooms" like dark places similar to normal mushrooms, but are connected to the spawning of Snotlings, Gretchin, Squigs, and Boyz. Boyz created by this process emerge fully-grown from cocoons, from which they rip and tear their way out as Orkilly as possible.
Keep in mind that all Orkoid organisms produce spores, and any given spore could mature into any given Orkoid phenotype depending on conditions. Not just Orks themselves, but also Gretchin, Snotlings, and all sorts of fungi or Squigs. Since there are enough varieties of the latter two to fill out every niche in a fully-formed ecosystem, there are quite a few thriving planets out there where the only things that aren't green are the freaking weather, rocks, and occasional bright red Squig, and the air everywhere is filled with perpetual shouting. Which is, let’s be honest, awesome.
Waaagh Urlakk Urg/Da Lost Age M31
Prior to the Horus Heresy, Orks were the biggest threat to the The Imperium of Man. So big that the Emperor of Mankind was personally involved. The great galaxy spanning Ork Empire was put into temporary decline when Horus beheaded Warlord Urlakk Urg. The defeat of such a great Warboss led to the Orks being considered a broken force. By the time of the Horus Heresy the Orks were considered little more than vermin by the Imperial Forces, which would be their greatest mistake.
Waaagh Beast/Da Age of Da Beast M32
While the humies were off fighting their little civil war, the Orks were biding their time to create a proppa WAAAGH!. Six great Warbosses formed an alliance and brought together the shattered tribes of the Orks under a single cause; Da Greatest WAAGH the galaxy had ever known!!! The Ork forces raided myriad isolated Imperial worlds, cut off by warp storms during Horus Heresy and so unprotected and primed for looting, whilst the Bosses for their part managed to reclaim Da Home of the Orks, Ullanor.
The best Big Meks of the time came up with the idea of the Attack Moons, giant battle stations big enough to contain teleport-y gates and entire legions of Orks. The simple presence of one in orbit could decimate an entire planet's surface due to gravitational pull, and debris. This massive mobilisation by the Ork forces against the planets that lost contact went unnoticed by the Humies for a near fatal period of time. It wasn't until the entire Imperial Fist Chapter was wiped out barring one (Don't worry gitz we gotz him in the end!) that the Imperium knew of the severity of the threat. They then realized there wasn't just one Attack Moon, there were ... Lotz!
- The Orks rebuilt Ullanor.
- The Beast (All 6 of them) made their presence known to the Imperium by killing off all but one Imperial Fist. Prime-Orks the size of Hab Blocks with Nobs the size of Warbosses and Boyz the size of Nobs.
- The Beast teleports an Attack Moon into Terra's orbit.
- The Beast sends Ambassadors to psychologically damage the Imperium's morale.
- The Beast takes on Vulkan and wins, though Vulkan likely got better.
- Waaagh Beast hits decline as the Imperium use Sisters of Silence along with captured Weirdboyz to explode vast swathes of the Waaagh.
- The Beasts slowly get killed one by one.
- Ullanor is reclaimed by the interlopers and marked for Exterminatus.
- The Adeptus Mechanicus feel a bit Ork-y and want that sweet loot, so they teleport Ullanor into a new orbit and rename it Armageddon!
Da Age of War M41
This is the age of Warhammer 40k from when GW didn't progress the timeline.
- Da Lost Waaagh
- Tuska Daemon-Killa
- Rynn's World
- The Second War of Armageddon.
- The Third War of Armageddon.
Da Age of Da Ork M42
With the advent of GW advancing the timeline so too has the Ork timeline advanced.
- The Great Rift has been dubbed Gork's Grin by the Orks. The Warp Rifts are being used by Orks to "navigate" across the galaxy. Typically being dropped into the best fights in the galaxy.
- Old Zogwort's Wierdwaaagh! destroyed a planet with Mork's snot.
- Mad Dok Grotsnik has been leading a Painboy Waaagh that's captured Silver Templar Primaris Marines.
- Ghazghkull is blessed by Gork and Mork so much that he can use the Warp Rifts (Or some unknown means) to be at multiple places across the galaxy.
- Freebooter Warbands close in on the traitor world of Eisenfel, where Gork's fist is gonna crush da Chaos Gitz.
- Nazdreg is gonna loot a Stormsurge to prove that his boyz have the most Dakka, and surpass Badrukk's Flash Gits.
- The Antonis Crusade kills a bunch of Orks, leaving them as feral warbands, only for Night Lords and Feral Orks to destroy them.
- Death Skull Waaagh Zort loots the Necron Tombworld of Overlord Thanptek the Magnificent. Including the Overlord himself. Sod off, Trazyn! Go zog yerselves, Blood Birdies. We’z da best lootas der iz!
- Rynn's World gets Primaris reinforcements which acts as a beacon for Orks who want to Rynn's World 2: Electric Dakka-loo
- A Blood Axe Waaagh defeats the Heretic Skull Knights warband on Jakhtor. When the Blood Axes retreat it's soon realized that they are waiting for the Imperial reinforcements to arrive so they can get a proppa' fight.
- Krooldakka has lead a Speedwaaagh! on the planet of Vigilus. Leading to Ork death racing while waiting for the planet's defenses to weaken.
- Waaagh! Snagrack starts during the Psychic Awakening. A Deffskullz Waaagh! with a large number of Madboyz created by the Great Rift.
- Waaagh! Wazzdakka speeds towards Terra on his Bike of Da Aporkalypse.
Occasionally, if a "tech-caste" gets into control of an Ork society, ridiculous constructions can result. Best example we know about is the Telon Reach Empire and its central stronghold Gorro. A "scrapworld", Gorro was full of things that shouldn't have worked at all (Horus notes that individual bits of architecture inside were just too mad for any human to contemplate) and could withstand the normally planet-killing weapons on the Vengeful Spirit and Imperator Somnium (the Emperor's own flagship). The Orks defending it were far more advanced than most (everything from their augmentations to the accuracy of their ships' weapons) and had actually built a plasma reactor to hold their world together. Their function mostly relied on the Orks' gestalt, as the core began to fail as the Emperor, Horus and their respective posses carved through the population. Once the Emperor killed the resident Warboss and psychically burned the rest of the Orks (a preview of what he'd eventually do to Horus) the system went into total meltdown.
How Ork Technology works is up for debate. As written Ork technology is beyond comprehension by the majority of races. Their weapons/tech work and other races can use them, but not as effectively. Techpriests have taken apart Ork guns and reassembled them to what they assume is the same configuration only to find that they don't work any more. This leads to two schools of thought on Ork Technology.
The Anzion Theorem of Orkoid Mechamorphic Resonant Kinetics - Every Ork is a Psyker
The Anzion Theorem postulates that Ork technology works mainly because the Orks think it does. The explanation is that the subconscious gestalt psychic field that all Orks generate enables their technology to function; the stronger the field, the more esoteric their technological achievements become. In older versions of the fluff, if you hand an Ork a pipe and convince him it's a gun, it WILL shoot bullets. In current fluff, this is definitely not the case; if you hand an Ork a slugga that has been stripped of all internal mechanisms, it won't suddenly start firing bullets just because the Ork believes it should. However, if a crudely manufactured slugga consistently misfires in the hands of a human but *does* fire reliably when wielded by an Ork, it is definitely Orkish belief that is bridging that gap. If the Ork picks up a mixed handful of slightly different caliber rounds and jams them into it, it will (most likely) shoot them all and not jam up from the different sizes. This means that technologies that should be impossible become merely unlikely when crafted by an Ork. In short, if Ork technology is held together by spit, duct tape, and hope, then the Orks' psychic field provides the hope.
To put it another way, Orks believe that, "Red wuns are fasta." They believe that blue is lucky. They believe that yellow is more shooty and/or more explosive, and that black represents strength and toughness. And because they believe this, it manifests as true; thus this applies not only to the Orks themselves but also to their wargear. For example, a meat cleaver in the hands of an Ork can tear through the toughest ceramite armor if the Ork believes it will; for anyone BUT an Ork, a power weapon or the equivalent would be required to do so. That same cleaver, with a battery and wires crudely bolted to it, would BE a power weapon in the hands of an Ork.
This tends to work well for them, but not for the other races of the galaxy: Imperial observers note that Ork weapons will generally function poorly or not at all in the hands of a non-Ork. The only reason the Orks haven't exploited the limits of their generated gestalt field by creating easily made but devastatingly powerful weaponry that could eclipse the weapons of the other races is that they themselves do not know nor understand that they create said field, they believe that their equipment works because that's how the universe works, not because they themselves are making it work. Which, in a way, makes it true. This, in turn, makes for an interesting paradox: If Orks managed to understand the physical universe as it is, they would not believe their "weapons" work, thus stripping them of their psychic advantage. If there is a little ounce of disbelief, this would quite literally nullify their ability to believe hard enough to manipulate reality. Of course, this is actually monumentally absurd when you think about it. The galaxy is full of trillions of Mekboyz and Weirdboyz who have collectively been Orkin' about for billions of years, and yet not one has ever figured out this fundamental aspect of Orkiness?
This said, Orky know-wots DO have a say in stuff that the Orks build. Mekboyz build much of the stuff they do because they have been genetically programmed with the knowledge on how to make and maintain their technology. While much of their tech runs because they want it to, the fact is that the Orks can actually produce, and even improve upon, technology based on certain conceptual principles that they somewhat understand and can replicate to some degree or another. This explains how Orks can build such technological wonders as the Shokk Attack Gun, Tellyportaz, and Gargants. Also, there have been instances of Ork tech working well in the hands of other races (at least for a time till it blows up). Be careful though, most Ork players have very deep-set opinions on how Orky tech works, and debates between them can generate much RAGE.
So if the Anzion Theorem is true, there are still some unanswered questions. For example, if Orks do indeed create some innate psychic field of belief, then would Sisters of Silence or a Blank be able to interfere with or destroy that power, thus causing Ork constructions to fail? We know Orks DEFINITELY have a passive psychic field, after all, but the Sisters don't seem to interfere with it in the same way that they do with the active psychic powers wielded by battlefield psykers. Perhaps the answer is that WAAAAGH energy is something almost completely different from the psychic abilities that other races use, and it therefore tends to ignore/negate some of the restrictions other psykers have. That would suggest that when the Old Ones created the Orks they used some other form of psychic phenomenon that is unrelated to or is isolated from the warp somehow. This might suggest that Orks' gestalt psychic field is actually a very advanced form of technology similar to that used to create the Webway. Alternatively there may be another distinct metalevel in the warp that Orks draw from; after all, we know Orks' gestalt field works as well in the warp as in reality, because their ships can traverse the warp without Gellar fields and remain unharmed. Ultimately we don't know, but there is definitely something going on. Probably. Who knows? In the end, we should look at it from the viewpoint of an Ork: As long as it works, who cares? Worrying about it just means less time krumping gits.
Orks and the Emperor
An extension of the "All Orks are Psykers" theory is that the Emprahs continued existence (despite the fact his throne is in serious need of an MOT) is the fact that the Orks BELIEVE it to be so. As any self-respecting Weirdboy will tell you, what da boyz fink will 'appen 'appens (see below), so if they think the Emperor is still alive then alive he will be. Probably cos they're stupid enough not to realise he's a corpse more fucked than a Slaaneshi cultist at Ciaphas Cain's place.. 'ANG ON A SECOND.. I FINK DEY BE MAKIN FUN OF US...WELL.....MAYBE WE OUTTA GO STOMP SUM HUMIES! That's right, the "chaos boys" are messing with you Orks, go stomp them in the name of the Emp... For the WAAAGGGHH! (-ahem- Heretics...) Although in the Ghazkull/Makari novel they dismiss the "humies' dead god" as a pathetic wimp who cannot even stand from his throne to krump some gitz in person.
Orks and Yarrick
Another slightly less stupid theory. Commissar Sebastian Yarrick is still alive despite his massive, massive age because Ghaz and his boyz think he should be alive. Also Orks believe a glance from Yarrick can kill them, so Yarrick installed a laser eye and it works better against the greenskins. And of course, he also wields an Ork power klaw that, perhaps for the all the same reasons, apparently works quite well for him.
Ork Technology is More Advanced than it Seems
"Cultural collapse, reorientation of belief systems in the aftermath of a renaissance can provoke magical thinkin' in previously rational beingz..."
- – Talker, Madboy on the subject of the Adeptus Mechanicus
On another perspective. Looking over the Ork codices from old to new the only record of Orks willing technology to work is one line in which a techpriest says "Well if we can't figure this out it must be magic". In fact, the only source besides that codex entry is this 1d4chan page... All other lore being from the Techpriest perspective. The Ork Codex points out that Mek Boys and Big Meks are genetically engineered by the Brain Boyz/Old Ones to know how technology works. In "Evil Sun Rising", the Big Meks who created the Stompa Fat Mork don't remember how they created their super compact, miniature red sun engine. The implication is that as the Meks worked together that it unlocked the technology. This might mean that the Brain Boyz/Old Ones programmed the mek genetics to gain access to bigger and better equipment when the army is at a proper size to create and maintain such weaponry. As Ork numbers grow and WAAAGHs become bigger more technology is unlocked. The Gorkanaut and Morkanaut walkers are unlocked when Meks begin thinking that a Great WAAAGH is coming along.
Ork technology is special in many ways; while crude and impossible from an outsider perspective almost all of Ork technology is based on the idea of looting the enemy technology. They are the apex scavengers and can create weapons from the technology of the Imperials, Tau, Eldar, Necrons, and even the biotechnology of the Tyranids. It could be guessed that the Brain Boyz wanted Orks to be able to adapt to any battlefield and be able to resupply without need of supply lines. In this way Orks don't need to wait for a spaceship to drop a Titan to the battlefield for back up, instead they can build one out of that broken humie one.
And this is BEFORE we even consider what the hordes of the Beast were able to do what no other concurrent faction could, such as create Void Shielded Deff Dreads, Ork Ambassadors, and teleporting attack moons into the Terra's orbit.
HOWEVER there are a few holes in this theory. First one must remember that the Imperium is not the only faction to try and study/retrofit Ork technology. The Tau have a much greater understanding of science and engineering than the Imperium and still cannot figure out Ork tek. Though there isn't much from the Eldar perspective on how Ork Tek works, which could just mean that they don't care. The second point is that Orks use materials that shouldn't work as components for weapons and technology. When was the last time you built a gun out of sheet metal and literal droppings, and it actually worked? Finally there's Colorz; red paint causes things to go faster, yellow causes explosions to be bigger, and purple makes everything stealthy. Though Colorz only exist in the rules with Red Ones Go Fasta and Deff Skulls being lucky,
most of the other stories are overblown fanfics by the fanbase *SMASH* WAAAAAAAAAGH!!!!!.
Be that as it may. The possibility exists that mekboys are combining psyker abilities and inherent technical knowledge to construct tools and weapons with nano-level engineering, allowing orks to use tech with a crude appearance hiding devices of unimaginable sophistication.
Special Note on Orky Vehicles
To properly describe what Ork vehicles are like is a difficult prospect, or perhaps an overlooked opportunity. Either way, few actually attempt to clarify in tangible terms what orkish vehicle-makers create.
Let's start with the venerable Trukk. Keep in mind that the standard Ork Boy is a hunched, monstrous, 7-foot-tall Hulk Hogan. Now, the Trukk is essentially an over-sized, skeletal pickup truck, with armored bus tires and a spiked ram-plate for a bumper. The frame is then covered in all manner of inch-thick armor plating, the basic standard in orkish vehicle armor. No Ork vehicle with more than two wheels has an engine smaller than a V8, and the trukk is no exception. A common brag for a trukk owner, "I'z put twelve silenderz in dis 'ere kart" (when not met with the classic "You shoulda sprung fer forteen!" comeback), is similar to a human saying he put an extra two cylinders in his car and overhauled his transmission ( hilariously the official trukk model from Games Workshop has a horizontally opposed 6 cylinder engine - a 40K Boxer engine).
Larger orkish vehicles, like the Big Trakk, often use V14 engines that any human would say belongs on a fishing trawler. Alternatively, some vehicles use turbine engines for extra torque (which is always a good thing) and a higher top speed (also a good thing), or crackling electrical engines (less popular than a good-old combustion engine, but can "accidentally" taze pesky Lootas or enemies who get too close (i.e. rammed)). Big Trakks are literally the size of a heavy tank, but are completely open-topped to provide a chassis for hauling Boyz or insanely big gunz into the fight. They have banks of fat-tired wheels or, most likely, four-plus-foot-wide treads. They have as much torque as a Battle Wagon and fear no infantry.
Special Groups of Orks
Apart from the regular Boyz, there are several groups of Orks who specialize in a specific task or doctrine. Called Oddboys (if they are relatively normal when fighting time rolls around) or Weirdboys (when they shoot lighting out of their eyes, gunz or eye-gunz). The most common ones are:
This category is filled with Orks who express genetic predispositions to certain tasks. Here are your Mekboys (engineers), Painboys (doctors), Weirdboys (psykers), Madboyz (psychos), Slaverz/Runtherders (take care of grots, snotlings and slaves), Brewerz (makers of alcohol; lost to time), Rockaz (musicians), and Shoutaz (communications experts).
Speed Freeks who commonly go into the battlefield on bikes hyped up on dakka and flashy bitz, as their name suggests, they'z like goin' faster dan fast. On tabletop, they're okay, since they're really shooty for Orks and fairly cheap. These guys field the classic Mobile Ork Army, which causes loads of Butthurt and Rage when people go up against them. Just look out for Lascannons.
- Flyboys - Crazed pilots that like fast vehicles, death defying stunts, and lots of dakka. The better pilots, fighta aces, are held in great esteem only by other flyboys and tend to give themselves crazy-cool nicknames.
Burna boyz are similar to standard orks in ability, possessing no unique qualities except every one of them being a pyromaniac. These boys are the type who would burn their own mother alive if she tried to stop them from playing with matches, even though Orks technically don't have moms. As such, they regularly burn their own comrades for the hell of it (to see them 'do da burny dance'). Their obsession with fire is, of course, genetically coded, and this has a particular disadvantage during periods of time where stealth is of the essence. In fact, this pyromania coupled with the rate of accidental deaths among Orks may explain why Burna boyz aren't more common; after all, an Ork that accidentally burns himself to death wouldn't be able to spread his spores so easily. On a more lighthearted note, they are also quite fond of fungus cigars! GREEN IZ BEST
Meks are Orks who are capable of making the ramshackle yet effective weapons and vehicles the Orks use. They're primarily the ones who make the warband's wagons, restore salvaged vehicles, and create/modify weapons. An Ork who lead bands of Mekboys is called a "Big Mek", and is a bitch to kill on tabletop if he's kitted out. Five-up cover saves for everyone! 'Oo sez we ain't smart 'n' such! Only fing betta den an ork is an ork wif a good bit of technorkology.
Basically Orks medics, a Painboy's instinctive understanding - and obsession - is with medicine, anatomy and surgery. Unlike the Meks above who are seen with something like respect, other orks think Painboyz are dangerous and won't go anywhere near them unless they really have to. This is because, like the Mekboyz, Painboyz are driven mostly by their urge to explore and experiment and aren't very good at concentrating on what they're supposed to be doing. Which is okay when the Mek tinkers with a piece of gear, but a lot worse when the Dok starts poking around inside a body and removing bits at random just to see how it works.
Many Orks enjoy the odd explosion. These guys like that so much that they decided what better way to get their kicks than to get into a nice squad of 5-15 boys and try blowing tanks sky high with their rokkits. They also train Squigs to run into tanks while strapped to the hilt with explosives. And if neither of that works, run into close-combat and strike the tank with a rokkit attached to a metal stick. They get so high off this that they will enter the broken vehicle, eat any survivors, and drink the motor oil in a ritual act known as "GETTIN' TANKED!"
Lootas are Orks who are obsessed with pimping out their shootas by salvaging bitz from their enemies. Lootas are critically important to Orkish mechanical industry, because they head salvage operations and assist Meks where Grots can't. They're also the ones who loot wrecked tanks and vehicles after a battle to use as Looted Wagons, with the help of Mekboys, which means Orks can remobilize rapidly, and scale up to match tank-driving foes.
When not fighting or looting, Lootaboyz are a menace to Orky society, stealing, swindling, making trouble, and being REAL BACKSTABBIN GITs the reason other Boyz can't have nice things. WOT?! YIZ SAYIN' DERE'S TIME WHEN DA ORKZ AIN'T FOIGHTIN' OR LOOTIN'?! I OUTTA GIVE YA A STAMP!!!
DA PIMPIEST ORK IZ DA BESTEST ORK!!!!!! Dat is why dey arrogant Gits. SPEAK UP I CANT 'EAR YA! They are another group of shoota-obsessed Orks known as "Flash Gitz"; rich, obnoxious Bad Moonz gits who buy powerful weapons and upgrades using their large stockpiles of teef. They love nothing more than showing off their wealth and (supposedly associated) martial power. They do things like wearing FABOLOUS clothing, sporting huge banners declaring their awesomeness (shogun-style), and plating everything they have in gold, silver, platinum, or any other shiny metal they have at hand (although gold is preferred). Goldz iz da bestest. Flash Gitz boast the shootiest kustom shootaz in all of orkdom, sometimes known as "snazzgunz", which makes them an invaluable asset to their clan. Conversely, due to their boasting and attitude problems they often alienate pretty much every other Ork they work with, and are prone to getting their arrogant asses booted out of their group the moment they become less useful than annoying.
Orks who raid and pillage the galaxy as MOTHERFUCKING PIRATES. And just to add to their awesomeness, they'll usually dress and/or speak like pirates. (W)AAARG! Well-known individuals include Kaptins Badrukk and Bludflagg.
Orks who managed to figure out that charging a gunline isn't always the best option, so dey'z da sneakiest of da Orks. In practice, all of this boils down to a fairly simple difference in tactics. Whereas a normal Ork Boy will see the enemy and immediately shout, run up to him, and smash him in the head, a Kommando will see the enemy, hide behind a nearby bush/barrel/lamp-post and wait for the enemy to get close like 5 feet to 2 meters, THEN shout, run up to him, and smash him in the head. They typically paint themselves purple, which Orks believe is the sneakiest color (and because Orks are Orks, purple does in fact make them harder to see ... don't ask how the fuck that one works, it just does Hav you eva seen a purpul ork? Course not, dey's
too sneaky don't exist.)
Kommandoz rely on stealth tactics rather than balls-out firepower, and achieve this by using crude camouflage techniques, Speshul Forces equipment such as night-vision goggles, various types of grenades, and all those other gubbins that makes them all sneaky. However, their best weapon is often that the concept of Orks using tactics beyond drowning their enemies in corpses and bullets is so completely out there that a lot of Imperial commanders do not believe that Kommandoz actually exist, which actually make their job easier to pull off. The Imperials quite often find out the very hard way that some orks have both brains and brawn. For instance, nobody laughed when a Kommando unit suddenly hi-jacked a unit of three Deathstrike Missile Launchers inside a Mordian regiment's lines drove one to the front and proceeded to launch it at the their front lines, killing thousands, including a Baneblade (Except for the Orks, who laughed their duffs off as this was happening). Meanwhile, the Kommandoz ran off with the remaining one and two extra missiles.
Kommandoz are typically distrusted by other Orks due to their chosen battle strategy. They view sneaking about rather than getting straight to a fight right and proppa as "Mukkin' about". The enjoyment of the color purple among them is also considered right strange. "Az dere ain't no such fing az a purpul ork!"
An ork asked about Kommando groups: "I dinna see anyfing... Do you?"
Hidden away in GW fluff are these guys. These guys are what happens after a WAAAGH! has left your planet. They crop up in wildernesses and form tribes. They don't have technology (like shootas) or any kind of Mekboyz or even good resources to build junk. They are roughly on par with your Fantasy Orcs, so you can just use your Fantasy army in 40k if you can fluff your army right. Not like it matters, it's the same tactic either game. They tend to have Grots, Kommandos and Weirdboys coming out of their ears, and love to ride big Squigs. If you don't prune them back to the forest well enough, they might sic buttloads of Squiggoths on you. Snake Bites love these guys, and if space-born Orks pick them up, Feral Orks usually become Snakebites anyway.
They breed a special kind of Oddboy, the Pigdok, who is a combination of a Mek and a Dok, but excels at neither. They do surgical procedures like a stereotypical medicine man, wander around covered in robes and talismans given to them by the Weirdboy Shamans, and head the construction of things like ballistas and catapults, all the way up to magical stompy Idols and the Steam Gargant.
Weirdboyz are Orks who are active psykers. All Orks are passive psykers, emitting their WAAAGH!! gestalt field, but Weirdboyz are the only ones who can decide they're gonna blow another Ork's face off with a mean look and a lightning bolt (and get it to actually happen). They tend to be crazy and can blow up if they're not careful. Even when they are careful. Sometimes blowing up is the preferred/expected option for a Weirdboy. Amusingly, most Weirdboyz are 'cowards', in the sense that they know bad things happen whenever they get into a fight alongside a bunch of other Orks so they try to avoid doing that. The other Orks are often forced to drag them along.
- "Don’t need an interpreter. We tell you how to surrender, you surrender. Easy. The Great Beast has you by the guts. Struggle, he’ll rip ’em out. Surrender, you get to keep ’em." - Bezhrak, Ork Ambassador
"Ambassadors" as the humans of Terra called them are a dignified and "majestic" Oddboy dedicated to delivering threats directly to the enemy through the powerful weapon of words. At this time there is no known Ork name for these Oddboyz and are very rare to encounter. They carry staffs as their only weapon and have the ability to speak languages as if they were native speakers. The Ambassadors not only discussed terms of surrender, but acted as psychological warfare to destabilize the enemy.
- The self-inflicted moral wound the Imperium would suffer if it acted with less sophistication than orks would be a septic one. - Vangorich
Only ever seen during WAAAGH! The Beast in 544.M32. More modern encounters with ork Runtherders and similar ork-to-men communiques tend to use a translator device/person, instead. That said, many orks do pick up Low Gothic while interacting with human armies, especially more kunnin' Warbosses and Warlords.
Hilariously, Grot snipers are a thing that exists, but it's incredibly rare to see them. It's probably because any grot that manages to slap together enough spare parts into a rifle get spotted by an Ork who thinks it would make a nice foundation for a decent shoota, and said grot will almost immediately get robbed at shoota- or choppa-point. On the other hand, these might make it in a scenario when Orks realize that a passable longarm is more valuable in the hands of somebody who can actually shoot straight.
There was an incident in the short story Red Reward where a guy was dropped into the front of some trench warfare between the Guard and Orks, and inspired the humiez to drive back the Orks in a counter charge only to get shot by a grot sniper. Ironically, the guy signed up with the Guard to escape prosecution on his own world, meaning he would have been a valid target to the elusive Ork sniper.
All following Ork Oddboys have been lost to time ("Everything is canon, just not always true" - The way GW avoids officially retconning anything). They live on in our hearts (and custom-models) as:
Rogue Trader Orks with a penchant for hard rock, metal, leather armor, and overgrown hair squigs. They do seem to keep cropping up in the fluff though never in any significant capacity. Also known as Goff Rokkas, these boyz tend to come out of the Goffs exclusively, but it isn't completely unknown for other Clans to spit out one of these crazy green "musicians". They play machine gun guitars and PARTY 'ARD!!! It should be noted that Rokkas were invented in the Eighties, so they don't play things like Death Metal as much as they do generic Metal, 80's Metal, electric guitar ballads, and Hard Rock. (note: the Goff Rokkas essentially make the Dawn of War III ork theme canon) And...now they're back and canon again, in the June 2020 White Dwarf. Albeit renamed to the Goff Rokkerz instead.
These orks have over-developed lungs and super-strong vocal cords so that they can yell really loud. Yes, you heard me right. They yell across Gargant-tops and over battlefield din to act as a telecommunications array.
See, not all things that have disappeared were too good to last. SHUDDUP STOOPID HUMIE, WHUT DO YOU KNOW?!?!?! SHOUTAS IZ DA BEST!!!!!!!
YOU'Z CALL DAT SHOUTIN'? YOU'Z AIN'T A REEL SHOUTA, YA GIT!
A REAL SHOUTA
DROWNS OUT DA
I'z prefur sneekin' up to some hummie and shoutin' in iz ear from reel gut close.
Anyone caught messing with this section again will get their shit handed to them. Do you know how fucking hard it is to make sure this shit is right? I can't do this AND dodge those fucking Orks. I'm a janitor, and a FUCKING BENDY PENIS!
See, iffin' you'z had sum of dat purpley paint, dis wouldn' be a problem now, would it?
'e got youz good, e' did. aneewayz da squigs ated da inturn again. Git ta cleenen dat wod ya.
I 'erd dem cleanin' orks do wat they do and don't even want no teef for it
Dem Kleenaboyz iz ryte fine ladz, Dey gitz a 'fungabeer offa me n'ytime dey needz.
Never mentioned after about 3rd Edition. Brewerz, or Brewer Boyz function much like Mekboys or Mad Doks do, knowing the ins and outs of brewing through genetically inherited intuition. They make alcohol out of squigs. Made everything from beers to malts to meads to liquors to scotches. Yes, certain squigs can be made into scotch. No, no grains are involved in the process. No, they've never done this in Scotland. No, you may not question this.
SQUIGGIE WALKER - RED LABEL! COS IT ZOGZ YOU IN DA BRAIN FASTA!
Eend out of mashrooms too booss!
Basically, they brew babies into beer sometimes.
HERESY, ORK HERESY, ANY IMPERIAL CITIZENS WILL BE MURDERED ON SIGHT AFTER READING THIS. *WHAM* OY BOSS, DEM HUMIES IZ TRYN'A TAKE AWAYZ OUR SQUIG JUICE!
Zoggin DAMN'IT! NOT AGAIN!
MY EYES!!!! THEY BURN!!!
Vaguely referenced in older fluff and glimpsed during Blood Bowl, sacrificed because nobody wants to see those canonized saggy Ork tits (Except /d/), and fucking whores (and ye mum). Suffice to say, some drawfags will still draw them and several on /tg/ will doubtlessly fap to it. Considering how many random mutations are seen amongst the Orks, the possibility is more likely than you'd think. In normal canon, Orks are asexual, popping out of fungal growths in the ground...
...but in the oldest fluff, when the Orks were basically Fantasy Orcs in Space, there were female orks. Slightly later (2nd Edition) fluff modified that idea: during later parts of their life cycle Orks would temporarily develop sexual characteristics and go bang one another. For the sake of Games Workshop's writers' self-respect, the idea of any orkish sexual reproduction was completely removed and forgotten. And all but the drawfags are happy for that.
Given the kind of universe Warhammer 40,000 is, the decision to make orks functionally genderless (a decision which occured some time in the early 90's) was likely driven by two factors: to reinforce the Orks warlike nature by making them dependent on getting blown up to repopulate and hardwire them for blockbuster-style total war, and the aforementioned removal of sex and gender discussions from the ugly comedy faction of an incredibly dark tabletop wargame. The change was both thematically appropriate and steered writers and fans away from uncomfortable topics. As of 2020 however, the idea of female orcs and goblinoids is fairly accepted across basically every genre and fictional universe which involves greenskins of any sort. This is a fairly significant change from the prevailing attitudes of the 20th Century fantasy, which was largely driven by
bad writing female orcs and goblins being hidden somewhere and largely irrelevant.
More recent fluff has backed this up, stating that Orks have no reproductive organs and thus no personal concept of sex or gender. Some, usually Blood Axes or Slavers, are aware of the existence of the concept in other races, albeit at a rudimentary level; one bemused Blood Axe went on record describing the whole thing as funny and a captured tech-priest was once bribed with women as an incentive to do something for a Warboss.
Oi'm twalf an' wots dis? DAT GIT WAZ KRUMPED FOR DIS POST.
Not seen since the heydays of second edition and Epic 40k, although they're still mentioned here and there in the fluff. Madboyz are Orks that go crazy under the mental strain of knowledge encoded in their genes suddenly becoming available, their behavior becoming erratic and unstable even for Orks. The other Orks often round them up into a large warband that is set loose upon the enemy, in the hope their madness will prove useful or at least entertaining. (In game terms you rolled for their actions randomly, and it could vary from outright fleeing to going absolutely berzerk and charging forward while ignoring wounds.)
We had da new rulez for thiz gitz for weirdboy awotkaning
Brain Boyz is the name that the Orks give the Old Ones. However, the Orks' origin has shifted around a few times, such as the Brain Boyz being the ancestors of the Snotlings (although the Orks still believe that, but it's no longer the official explanation it was in Rogue Trader).
(OBJEKSHUN! Dat'z still canon! (In fact, everything is canon! [Just not always true]) Codex 7th ED 2014 and we'z seen it in the one before dat un too!!! What shrooms did ya zoggin' gits eat?!)
Back in Rogue Trader, there was a book - "'Ere We Go: Orks in Warhammer 40,000" and, hidden away on Page 92, complete with accompanying models, was a reference to these odd examples of Ork
Humour Ooomarr. Traditionally, they are made in the form of Space Marines, Eldar or Squats though with more exaggerated features and comical patterns of movement designed to imitate and mock these species. To Orks, such effigies are highly amusing and they take great joy in having created such clever parodies of their enemies. Whilst a Tinboy's external appearance does vary, its simplistic inner components make it easy to spot and identify on the battlefield where they are deployed as a psychological weapon, for misdirection and distraction. In the game Shootas, Blood & Teef the protagonist refers to an imperial knight piloted by Lord Horrik Canorem as a "Zoggin' eck Big Tin Boy", if this is a reference to the old Rogue Trader "Tin Boy" or just a coincidence is unknown.
Chaos Orks & Mutant Orks
Back in the days of Rogue Trader, Chaos was considered an equal opportunity employer instead of just relying on corrupted Space Marines and humans, which admittedly makes more sense. As such Chaos Orks were very much a thing, and in fact came in two distinct groups; Stormboyz of Khorne and general Chaos Orks. The basic idea was that most Stormboyz who didn't grow out of being Stormboyz would eventually gravitate to worshipping Khorne, as this was back in the day when Khorne had more of an "honorable, disciplined warrior" motif to him and thus he was considered a fine role model by the Stormboyz, whose whole thing was being disciplined, organized and professional compared to the anarchic barbarians of other orks. Other orks could also fall to Chaos, often but not always Khorne, without being still part of the Stormboyz cult. Both sets of Chaos-worshipping orks were regarded as "un-orky" by their mainstream fellows, but would sometimes be hired as mercenaries by warbosses in particular need of their killing power, or who just didn't really bother vetting their latest Freebooter hire all that well - they'd also happily join Chaos armies, where they were welcomed.
The big difference mechanically is that Khorne's Stormboyz were Stormboyz with the Mark of Khorne, whilst Chaos Orks were Orks with Chaos Marks, Chaos Gifts and Mutations.
Separate to both of these Mutant Orks, who had no intention of worshipping Chaos, but still got mutated as a result of exposure to Warp energies, radiation, psychic phenomena from the local weirdboy or the experiments of a Mekboy or Painboy. These wretches were social outcasts, and sometimes were allowed to join a Waaagh as expendable cannon fodder - not that they cared, because they hoped to ultimately prove they were still properly Orky. These poor sods sometimes mutated all the way into Chaos Spawn-OHGODGLARBABALAAGAAH!
\*Ahem.* While there has been no mention of nonhuman and nondaemon Chaos forces for several editions (save some background Xeno races worshipping Chaos), the idea of Chaos Orks makes perfect sense when you think about it. Not only because there's no real reason the Ruinous Powers should only corrupt humans, but also because there are Quadrillions or Orks in the galaxy, so at least some of them are bound to decide that Khorne is more killy than Gork or that Tzeentch is more cunnin' than Mork, regarldess of whether or not they actually are. Nurgle would probably take a liking to them as well, not just because Nurgle likes everybody, but also because Ork spores tend to infect and kill a planet's ecosystem in much the same way a mundane fungus might a plant or animal. Slaanesh would seem to have the fewest Orkish worshippers, since the most common way Orks get their rocks off would end up empowering Khorne more, but then you remember that Slaanesh thing is 'excess' and what do orks like to do in excess of even to the point of self destruction? Go fast and be loud. Malal doesn't really seem to have anything going for him in this department, admittedly, but then he doesn't really have anything against him either like Slaanesh does, and maybe a couple of Mekboyz decided to make enough of a boom to destroy the universe.
Ultimately the lore has arrived at this explanation for Orks and Chaos: Their psychology just doesn't give much fertile soil for Chaos to take root in. While they love fighting, they don't really experience hatred that Khorne could feed on. They have no sexuality or appreciation of excesses beyond the banal joy of constant war (an objective lie given their fondness for fungus beer), so Slaanesh has nothing to tempt them with. Similarly, their wants and schemes are so unsophisticated and direct that there's nothing for Tzeentch to manipulate, and their biological nature so coarse and brutal in its simplicity that Nurgle can only be impressed as these grunting warrior mushrooms conquer the galaxy. However, 6th ed Chaos Space Marines codex did mention an invading ork infected with a daemonic plague prior to Mortarion and Plague Marines showing up on the assaulted shrine world ; though in this case they were unwillig allies at best, victims of Chaos at worst, and not truly Nugrglite converts.
Oi, listen up ya gits. Dere's six diverant majah clanz of Ork, and dey's all right 'ard. Da clanz waz made way back by the biggest, baddest warboss dere eva waz, startin' out as his specialist boyz before dey became dey own klanz.
- Dere's da Snakebites, and dey'z a buncha fundie gits what won't use any teknowlogy more complicated den a choppa an' warpaint. Anytime dere's a world dat a WAAAAAGH smashed up, it gets full o' fundie boyz. When we pick em up, a lot a dem run off ta da Snakebites anyway instead o' learnin how ta fight propa. But dey got squiggoths, an' every WAAAAGH needs really big killy fings. Snakebites wear brown, like a buncha zoggin' humie 'Armish folk.
- On the tabletop, Snake Bites have the rule 'DA OLD WAYS' which allows them to ignore any wound rolls of 1-3 unless the attack is S8. It's best for green tide-style ork armies or keeping that Squiggoth alive until it gets within krumping range.
- Da Bad Moonz, what gotz lotsa teef 'cause dey grow faster den any other orks, so dey'z a buncha rich gits. 'at meanz dat dey's got da best squigs and dakka, but since dey'z such lazy gits, dey's no good at choppin' an' stompin', so other orks can always just find a Bad Moon and stomp his teef out. Bad Moonz wear Yella, da color a big booms and shiny bits.
- On the tabletop Bad Moons take Dakka up to a whole new level with their 'ARMED TO THE TEEF' ability; meaning they have +6 range to EVERY dakka or Heavy gun, and they get AP-1 on 6s. Great for an orky gunline.
- Goffs are the fightiest of all da Orkz. Dey'z always fightin', especially wif eachother - it's a rare Goff dat hasn't killed atleast somefing every day of his life. Dis constant fighting makes dem da toughest an' meanest of all da Orkz. Ghazghkull Mag Uruk Thraka 'imself wuz a Goff. Dats why he's so big, 'ard, an mean. Goffs wear black, da color a bein' DED 'ARD!
- Goffs have three great things going for them, the first being the prophet of Gork and Mork and second being their ability 'NO MUCKIN' ABOUT' which gives them a melee equivalent to the (now dead) Dakka! Dakka! Dakka! ability, namely their 6's on melee attacks generate new attacks (for which you still have to do the hit roll). Alongside that, charges get you S+1 on any attack, making a squad of Slugga boyz capable of delivering all sorts of carnage if they manage to reach the enemy. Melee focused ork armies are preferable for this clan.
- Da Evil Sunz're all part a da Kult a Speed, and dey've got da most Meks, so dey're always muckin' about with teknowlogical equipment an speedy karts. Deyz big believas in da color red, cuz RED 'UNZ GO FASTA!
- When playing the Evil Sunz on the tabletop take full advantage of their 'RED ONES GO FASTA' ability and use as many 'speed freek' models as you can, the clan ability gives all units a plus one inch to their move and advance; with speed freek models this bonus is 2 inches instead.Oh and the ability also means you can advance your units and not suffer any penalty to accuracy for your assault weapons.
- Deffskullz are a buncha teevin', lootin' gits what'll grab anyfin' what's not nailed down an' if it's nailed down dey'll loot the nails den loot da fing wot was nailed down an' make it orky. An' oi does mean anyfin'. Even in da middle of a scrap. Da mekz loves em, though, cuz nobody'z got more bitz and gubbinz than a Deffskull Loota. Deffskullz all seemz ta have some kinda technikal know-wotz, dough. Deffskullz wear da color Blue, cuz Blue's a lucky color. deyz 'ave a bit of a "bad relashunship" wif some 'umies called da blud rafens. deyz hatez da blud rafens.
- On the tabletop, Deathskulls have the ability 'LUCKY BLUE GITZ' which gives them a 6+ invulnerable save, BTW they all have OBSEC. You are also able to re-roll a single hit roll and a single damage roll for each unit with that culture. This clan is sort of an all rounder for ork players, a jack of all trades sort of deal.
- And, last of all but not least, dere's da Blood Axez. Dey're da ones what've been hangin' around them stinkin' humies fer ages too long, and gone and developed all sorts a un-orky tings like taktiks, recownasense, cammerfloggs, an' worse of all, retreat. Dey've even got a sayin' bout it: "If we runs for it, it don't count as losing, cuz we can also come back for anuvver go, see?" Dey'z mocked as a buncha cowardly gits by most'a da boyz, but 'cause dey be dead cunning dey'z da main source of da best warbosses in WAAAAAAAGH! time (Next ter Da Prophet hisself, o'course). Blood Axes also do lots of talkin' wiv humies, so deyz gots idears like tradin' with da' humies',
peacewaitin' fer da roight time ta fight, an' using armour and gunz wot don't stop working just 'cause otha' gitz believes dey'z useless (SEE, HUMIES ARE GUD' F'R SOME FINGS BUT NOT EVERY FING!). Blood Axez wear cammerflage, but at least they paint it nice an' bright so's you can see'em coming.
- Tabletop wise, Blood Axes are tactical geniuses with their 'TAKTIKS' able to take cover despite not really being in cover as long as the enemy is at least 18 inches away, making them good against Shooty armies, additionally their kultur gives them the ability to shoot or charge (but not both) even if they fell back within the same turn; essentially meaning this is the kultur you use when you are the type of ork player who believes in tactical retreats.
Later, when da humies learned dat der was six Beasts, and each lead a "lejun" o Boyz, dey started tinking dat each o da Clanz were da rem... Re... Leftovers o' each Beast's lejun. 'Oo knows if datz da troof, I sure as zog dunno.
One last thing; any unit that only includes Gretchin don't get any benefit from their klan culture whatsoever. Because they suck at life.
- Den dere's da Freebootaz, boyz wut left deir klan ta become merks an' piratz and all'at. Freebooterz iz often kicked o' deir klan for likin' sumtin' dat izn't violence more dan violence, like Kaptin Badrukk (teef), Wazdakka Gutsmek (goin' fast), or Zodgrod Wortsnagga (snotlings), but some leave o' deir own accord for similar reasons, like Kaptin Bluddflagg (loot). Freebootaz work for stupid 'umies for shinies (or hats), though dat don't mean dey won't turn 'round an 'ave a go at dem too if dey fink dat gits dem more hats 'n fings.
- Although they aren't actually a klan the codex treats the Freebootaz as if they were; with the klan ability 'COMPETITIVE STREAK' which adds 1 to hit rolls whenever a nearby (within 24 inches) friendly unit has successfully wiped out an enemy unit. So if you have Shooty army and successfully manage to wipe out an enemy unity within 24 inches of some Lootas then you could give yourself a pretty impressive buff. It also applies to Choppy armies; get a single unit to wipe out an enemy unit while within 24 inches of your mob of slugga boyz, and your hitting on 2's for melee which combined with a large amount of boyz equals a bad time for whos facing them.
- Feral Orkz iz like Snakebites, but dey don't have a choice what wif not 'avin' access to Ork kultur seein' az dey don't got space travel. Often join da Snakebitez soon as dey'z recruited by a WAAAAAAGH!
- Beast Snaggas are loik a kind of really squigly-cybork gitz wot loik huntin' down tanks and big monsters. Dey gotz da biggest boyz, almost as big as a nob, cause deyz foighten all dem big an tough fings. Deyz ain't Feral gitz, an' are more loik da Kult of Speed, but prefer roidin' giant squigs ta trash everyfing dey run in to. Loik da Kult of Speed, any git can join da Beast Snaggas, but da Snakebitez really loik dem.
- If you want to play Feral Orks on the table top probably best to just treat them as snakebites, or give them no culture at all! Which makes sense giving they're uncultured scum even by the standards of other orks.
- Speed Freekz is what you call da members o' da Kult o' Speed, a klub any Ork what likes goin' fast a lot can join, not just da Evil Sunz. Deez gitz loik to run around on da edges of da WAAAGH! an' act loik doze scouts 'n outroiders dat doze non-orky gitz use.
- Even though to get the "Speed Freek" bonus you really should pair them with Evil Sunz.
What is the measure of a Klan?
It's easy to think that Ork Klans are just galaxy-spanning groups of like-minded Orks; like there's just six huge fucking groups of Orks around the galaxy but as we all know, if Orks were that united, the rest of the races would have a real big problem on their hands. Ork Klans are more like six types of Ork personality (and/or, depending on the writer, ethnicity/subspecies) that might have been engineered into the Orks way back by the Old Ones or created by the Beast's Legions in M32. Maybe they appeared on their own, who knows.
Let's take a random Ork Boy as an example. All Orks love a good scrap, looting and of course dakka. However, the individual Ork Boy tend towards one type of Orkitude over others. Maybe he's more into crashing into his enemies at high speeds (which would make him an Evil Sun) or maybe the looting after the battle is his jam (making him a Deff Skull). As a single Boy in a large mob, his preferences doesn't really matter - he'll just have to follow his Nob or get krumped - So it is the leaders and/or majority Klan of an Ork warband who'll decide how the mob acts. So a large horde of Orks led by a Goff Warboss will likely use black and white paint on their stuff and prefer melee combat like Goffs would, but that doesn't mean that every single Ork in the mob is a Goff.
When Orks gather for Waaaghs they tend to form new mobs that are actually comprised mainly of one Klan of Orks. The large amount of Orks in the Waaagh makes it easier for them to organize themselves into groups of similar interests. That's where the huge Mad Max-esque hordes of Evil Sunz Bikers and Trukks on Armageddon come from.
From another perspective, the ork klans could be seen as the orkish equivalent of various orkish ethnicity. Boys from the same klan will often have similar physiological features; goff boys are naturally bigger and tougher, bad moonz boyz teef naturally grow faster, etc. Orkish klans could be interpretted as orkish "races" inasmuch as orks are a "race" unto themselves. (Disclaimer: Not from /pol/) But they also reflect different philosophical views about what is best in life, whether it being going fast, having the flashiest lootz, or simply being the biggest, toughest ork of them all.
From another, other perspective, the klans can be seen as the devolved remains of Krork society based on their specialities.
- The Goffs' brute strength and serious demeanor would've have fit well for front line soldiers.
- The Bad Moons' control over the Ork economy and usage of secondary currency in the form of gold indicates they could've been merchants or bankers, as they manage to maintain an upper-class role without any orks going into poverty for long.
- The amount of time Evil Sunz spend working on their vehicles, as well as discovering a way to make them go faster just by painting them red would've made great engineers and mechanics.
- Although Blood Axes are considered nowadays to be untrustworthy gits by the other klans, their (relatively) unmatched knowledge in wartime strategy would fit the role of leaders and tacticians.
- Deathskulls are a little harder to pin down, but their constant curiosity for items to loot and add their own Orky innovations to it could be an indication of their previous roles as scientists or even artists (if the blue face paint is any indication)
- Finally, the Snakebites' amount of Oddboyz and squig handler could suggest they served as shamans and animal handlers (assuming Krorks still used squigs.)
Orks in the 41st millennium all speak one seemingly-universal language with no well-defined name. It's commonly called Orkish or Ork speak, both in-universe and not. As you can tell from the rest of this article, Orks speak a low, gruff, and guttural form of exaggerated Cockney English. Piratical-types such as Freebootaz and other mercenaries will mix in a stereotypical "pirate"/Bristol accent, along with appropriate nautical slang. If you're looking to do some homebrewing and want to make your orks Ur Doodz, consider lightly spicing up the basic "Ork accent" by adding more unique word use (industrial jargon, military terms, rural slang), and consider varying the accent by looking into the endless, undulating mass that are the accents of the British Isles.
Ork language is, in-universe, written in glyphs. Those glyphs correspond to both concepts and sounds. Out of universe, when orks are speaking their words are translated as English, but written with heavy use of "phonetic" spelling and 90's "krazy kool" spelling. The exact specifics of these changes are left up to the author.
The question of what Orkish actually is in-universe has been mildly debated, left up to interpretation, and spun several ways by Black Library and Codex authors over the years. Some possibilities include:
- A heavily accented form of Low Gothic.
- A distinct dialect of Low Gothic.
- A separate and not-mutually-intelligible language evolved from Low Gothic at some point in history.
- A unique language which did not arise from the languages of other races.
- A collection of distinct languages, all spoken by orks, which Imperial scholars can't be bothered to tell apart (this would mean some orks wouldn't understand other orks from distant regions of the galaxy).
- Actually, literally, just Cockney British English, spoken in universe, and either:
- Low Gothic is also literally British English, making Orkish a heavily accented form of Low Gothic, or...
- Low Gothic is entirely distinct from British English, meaning that orks would be speaking actual English 38,000 years from now, for no explained reason, and Imperial scholars are too stupid or too racist to realize that and subsequently go apoplectic trying to figure out why the fuck every greenskin in the galaxy is speaking some antique Terran language. (It may also be possible that a cover-up is in progress to prevent Imperial linguists from realizing this absurdity en-masse and all losing their minds at once.)
Do note that, in all of this, it is possible that the orks' psychic fields are acting as a translation tool whenever orks speak directly to anyone who doesn't know Orkish. This would allow for Orkish to be an entirely distinct language, which Imperial scholars could need to translate, but also allow orks to shout intimidating speeches at their enemies, and guarantee said enemies know exactly what insults are being hurled.
- Humie/Umie: Human
- Beakie: Space Marine
- Spikey Boy: Chaos-corrupted individuals
- Panzee: Eldar
- Gun Runt: Tau
- Tin Skull: Necron
- Bug: Tyranid
- Git: Generic insult/Anyone who ain’t being “Proppa Orky”.
- Choppa: Literally any melee weapon, even a bludgeoning one.
- Shoota: Two-Handed ranged weapon that fires a whole lotta dakka real fast.
- Slugga: One-Handed ranged weapon, more useful for making noise than for hitting things.
- Blasta: Two-Handed ranged weapon that isn't some kind of shoota (e.g.: Kustom Mega Blasta).
- Grot: A gretchin/An alternative insult to git.
- Snot: A Snotling, a Snot is usually a Midget/Young Gretchin.
- Drops/Bog: The communal toilet, where orks relieve themselves. Also filled with squigs and mushrooms.
- Squig: Short for "squiggly beast". Various symbiotic creatures encountered around orks. Grown from the same spores as orks and grots.
- Krump: Beat up and/or kill/destroy.
- Kustom: Specially made and/or customized gear, usually reserved for Nobs, Bosses, and Flashgitz.
- Gubbins: Components, especially those used to make something kustom.
- Zog: Ruin and/or destroy. Often used as a curse or exclamation.
- Dakka: Rapid fire capability and weaponry. It is impossible to have enough.
Everyday Life of an Ork
GET UP! Doesn't matter when, but usually in the mid-morning, unless a Nob kicks him in the face because he is late for something, which he usually is. Next, grab a bite. Either the breakfast his pet grot brings him or the grot itself. Orks don't care much about this since it all tastes the same dipped in mud, fried on a stick and washed down with some fungus beer.
Afterwards, hit the drops, or in layman's terms, the communal act of using the local bog. Literally. He might get a scar on his duff to show off if the Squigs are feisty that morning. Then muck about and try to find new things to kill. Or new ways to kill things. This lasts all the way until noon.
LUNCH! Fungus rums and beers. Squig pies and mushroom fries. Plenty of fights break out at lunch, mostly because of a Loota stealing another Orks 'sweet-squig' dessert. Or some drunk Nob mouthing off then get socked in the mouth by another Nob. Either way LUNCH! Next, nap time/ 'wrekreation'. Most Orks, having spent a very busy day trying to think up new ways to kill or new things to kill, will take a nap. Usually the average rank and file Boy who has nothing better to do. It is around now that the more specialized Orkoids shall gather in their respective mobs and set about spending afternoon and early evening doing what they do best. Be it practicing blowing crap up if tankbustaz. Racing around the camp as speed freaks. Helping the meks if lootas or burnas.
Hiding in plain sight if kommand- Move along, nofink to see 'ere.
WORK TIME! Da Boss or local Big Mek or Warp'ead bullies most everyone around the camp center and gets up on his WAAAGH!!! Banner-tower and starts to bark out orders on what they will attack that night, or where they will hit to steal material to build his next projekt, or give a flashy psycho-pyrotechnic light show during a prophetic chant. (though sometimes if no one got up till half past 5 they plan it during the early morning.) Depending on the Clan majority this can be as simple as "Smash dis!" (A Goff) to "Ok Dis team needs ta be 'ere right when da rockets hit Or we wont-"
(Yeah Blood Axes don't know when to shut up) *THUMP* ZOGGIN' 'Umiez.
DA ORKING HOUR! Do what was stated in the evening until they get tired and go home to bed. It don't count as failing cause they will try again tomorrow. Or pull it off and party all night (to the dismay of the defeated) until they pass out.
Even the Daily Life of the Ork is a miniature WAAAGH!!!
Reasons it Rokks to be an Ork
- We'z gotz a shiney new 8th ork-dition Codex-fingy, an dis time it's tourny-viable!
- We'z da biggest an' da strongest.
- We'z made fer fightin' an' winnin'.
- We'z got more boyz dan anyone else.
- All an ork eva wantz to do fo'eva iz to keep fightin', winnin', an' lootin'.
- Dem mekboyz can loot anyfing an I mean ANYFING!!
++Previous record has been made of note to Ordo Xenos for immediate actions to be taken. The Emperor Protects++
Ummm, wot woz dat? Zog, I've lost count of da resuns for being an Ork!
- We'z already know everythin' wotz wort' learnin'.
- We'z da 2nd least grimdark race in da galaxy. BUT DA BEZT GREENDARK hur hur hur!
- Da painboyz can fix ya up right'n proppa, even if yer bloody 'ead'z chopped off.
- We'z got da shiniest bitz, or we'z 'bout to krump da git dat does.
- The longa ya fite, the bigga and stronga ya get.
- Teef's legal tenda. Punchin' sum git in da face getz youz a day'z meal.
- All ya ave' tah worry 'bout is: foighin, lootin, speedin, sneakin, or mukin round wif sum technical gubbins ats' wots' used for foighin, lootin, speedin or sneakin. Da grots do da rest.
- If da mekboy can finks it, he can build it.
- An' if he sayz it workz, he's roight.
- We'z da orkz an' dey iz not.
- Dem 'umiez and marine boyz screamin' "FER DA EMPRER", an dem spikey boys yellin' "BLOOD FO' DA BLOOD GOD!" is nofin' kompared to "WAAAAAAAAAGH!"
- Da red wunz will alwayz go fasta.
- Purple iz da sneekiest culla.
- Yello' iz da 'splodiest culla.
- Blu iz da lukiest culla.
- Green iz da orkiest culla.
- I haz a hole in me chest an' a choppa stuck to me leg? Didn' notice it while I wuz krumpin dem spiky boyz.
- Unlike dem 'umiez, greyskins, an' panzees, anyone can be a warboss usin' nofin' more den a choppa an' a litl bit o' dakka.
- Even if all da boyz get krump'd, we'z still win. Da only way da gits can zog us off is by dakkain' da 'ole bludy planet.
- You'z can trade in yer dakka fer moah choppa, or vice versah, and you iz still Orky enuff.
- You'z kan build an army of serial bawkses an' duk' tape an' maybe a bit o' spikez an' bitz and still look reel smart an' orky.
- Rolling a double six with Shokk Attack Gun.
- Some Git shootz 90% of Your squad, but the Nob smackz one boy on the 'ead and everybody iz doing good.
- You'z kan legally talk like a
retardproppa ard' git.
- Giving da boyz a frying pan on the 'ead and a fender on the shoulda makes dem 'arder.
- Putting dem in a fridge makez dem mega'ard.
- You'z kan yooz every armiez gunz, but nun kan yooz yorz…‘cept dem armygeddun ork ‘unters.
- If you die you get proppa afterlife wiz lotta fighnin' an' booze, instead of being raped by laffin' daemons for eternity.
- Youz don't havta Hate everfink dat's not a Ork.
- You WILL die of larfin' if You play orkz.
- Eiff Edishun iz da horde edishun! We'z can field more boyz dan dem 'humies or bug fingies!
- No matta wot 'appens to da rezt of da galaxy, be it spikey boyz winning, Da 'umiez conkaring all da planetz, da Eldar succezzfully rezurrecting their godz, or da God-Emporer stepping down from 'is potty, you ztill 'ave a 99.99999% chance of surviving in zome capacity. There are Orks living in da Warp for Gorks sake.
- Wez da kannon winnaz of Soulstorm! Dat meanz we krumped dem 'undred baneblade fingys!
- Gorgutz WANTS DAT STIK!!!
- Lastly, an' most importantly, da mane reezun it rokkz ta be an Ork iz dis:
Reasons it sucks to be an Ork
- You're the one species that is actually dumber than humanity.
HERESY!*THUMP* LOK BOSS I GOT MEH WUN UH DEM UMIES!!!!
- Your war cry "WAAAGH!" is overused by everyone. LIEK IF "FOR DA EMPRAH!!!" IZN'T OVERUZZED AZ 'ELL
- No matter how hard you try, you will never achieve enough dakka... and if you did, it'd end up destroying you too. A TRAGGADY, DAT IS!
- Despite having some awesome-looking guns, you can't shoot things for shit. Your standard Ballistic Skill is 2 (which means at best hitting things on a 5+), and when you do shoot somebody successfully it's probably due to sheer volume of bullets more than anything else. YOU SAY DAT LOIKE IT'S A ZOGGIN' BAD FING!
- Your sole purpose in stories is to distract the Space Marines and the Imperial Guard from more dangerous threats like Chaos, Tyranids or Necrons. BUT WE'Z GET TA HAVE A REAL GREAT FIGHT WHILEZ BEIN' A DISTRAKSHUN. SO IT'Z STILL ALL GOOD. ALSO HAV YOU EVEN READ DA BEAST ARISES WE ZOG DEM HUMMIES UP. （Sadly, the series' average rating on Goodreads didn't even pass 4 stars, I think not a single book has passed 4 stars. So, I say they are not bad, but not that good either.）
- Your army falls apart at the seams the minute your Warboss dies. NAH, WE'S JUST GOT TA FIGURA' OUT WHUZ IN CHARGE NEXT, DAN WE COMES BACK AROUND TA FUMP EM AGAIN!
Hiss! By that time we've NOMNOMNOMNOM'D on you*CRUNCH* ANUDDA 'EAD FER ME POINTY STIKK!
- Orks do not draw psychic power from the Warp, but still take Perils of the Warp. DEM WEIRDBOY GITZ JUST ORK'D TOO 'ARD!
- Anytime you use anything, from your smallest pistol to your largest space ship, you have the same chances of surviving its use as a grot snuggling an overcharged standard issue Imperial Plasma Gun. Offset by the fact you can survive 4th degree burns, decapitation, being septic, and acquiring space tetanus. OY, DOK. WUTZ DIS TETANATHINGY? CAN WE'Z SQUISH ET?
- In Second Ed there was an alarming risk that your entire army might die before the battle actually started because almost no Ork units had sealed armour. ORKZ DUN' NEED ARMER! NOT WEN ORKZ GOT DAKKA!! SMASH DEM GITS WITOUT'IT!
- You have a mushroom and two spore pods dangling between your legs, and Kroot find it a delicacy.
GOOD MEAT BAKKAWW!*THUMP* I DUNNO WUT DIS DUN SAID BUT IT URT ME EYES SO I KRUMPED IT!!!!
- You're part of Squad Broken. WELL UH.... ZOGGIT, YOO GOT US DERE.
Even (some) vegetarians will eat youNOT IF WE EAT DEM FIRST! HAH! You haven't had a new codex since 4th edition. And it's starting to show.SHUT IT YA GIT, WE'ZE DA ORKS AND YOU'Z A BUNCH O PANSY GITS! B'SIDES, WE IZ GOING TA GET NEW CODEX DIS 6TH ED! OI BOSS WEZ GOT A SEVENF EDISHUN CODEX BEFORE THE PANSY GITS DID! N NOW WE'Z GOTZ A SHINEY NEW 7 ORK-DITION CODEX-FINGY! ZOGGIN' GORK! DIS EYFF EDISHUN KODEX IS DED KILLY! (And now you don't have a codex anymore.)*CRUNCH* 'AVE YOU 'EARD OF ORKTOBER, HUMIE? Your codex came out in November. There is a slight chance that Mattard is going to write 6th edition codex. If so, in the next codex you'll read something like this: "The Orks insatiable thirst for violence is, really, just a way of coping with the angst they feel that no matter what they do, they will never be Ultramarines."WHO KEEPS LETTIN' DEZ' HUMIES IN 'ERE! WE'Z BLOODY INFESTED! GET DA BURNAZ! (Also Mattard is apparently too busy with pestering Forge world for more Space marine resin collections to be converted into plastic for the main product line to be bothered with our humble bumbling green skins.)Tipakill 'umie bee'ayevyohr dat iz. Alwayz ignorin' da orky fingz in loif an' only payin' attentchuhn to zoggin' 'umie fingz. Downroight shaymfol dat iz. Da onlee REEL orky 'umie dere iz iz dat Kaptuhn Yarik; Gork - or eh, iz it Mork? - bless 'iz 'eart. (Trust us greenskin, Matt Ward ignoring you is a good thing.) But waznt 'e fired fur being an annoying grot?
I GOT DA BURNAZ!! WE HAVIN A BBQ?? MAKE MINE CRISPY AN DUN FORGET DA EXTRA SQUIG SAUCE
if dere ain't any Stormboyz, yer army k'n get krumped by da Blu Gitz real easy like. No not DEM blue gits The udda ones wif da nice dakka and puny stompas.*CRUNCH* OI! WHO LET DA GROT DO DA TALKIN?! WE JUS' SMASH DEM BLUEBOYZ WIT 'ARE CHOPPAS WHEN WE GET CLOSE, AN' IF DAT DON'T WORK WE JUST MATCH DERE AMOUNT OF DAKKA WIT SOME PRETTY KILLY SHOOTAS. UNLESS DEY SEND DA RED COMMIT THO... GOOD FING DEY GOT RID OF HIM! You probably don't have a penis. You can piss on Space Marines, only to die a short while later.IZ DAT BAD FING? OOMIEZ SAYZ DAT IT VERY HURTZ WHEN WE 'IT EM IN IT? Wait... Dat what dey call the mushroom'n'spore pods? Poor suckas! Dey have PAIN nerves down dat way? No WONDER dey scream so bad when we kick em there.
- You all piss yourselves at the very mention of the name of a certain Red Armored Swordsman. WE'Z JUST BE SO EXCITED CAUSE DAT BLUE-BOY ACTUALLY PUTS UP A FIGHT!
More so than the Orks did against an old Ethereal with a pointed stick! *KRUMP* SHUT IT YA GREAT LANKY BLUE GROTDat Red Kommit ain't got nottin' on Yarik, da Kommit just has a good choppy bit! Yarik jus' has ta look at ya funni to zog ya! *Thunk* Da Redd Kommit wuz tearin' boyz wif his stompaz' bare 'ands before 'e found da choppa ya grot!
- One of your gods has the voice of Robin Williams. Izzat a bad fing?
- You have to deal with Vance Stubbs fans refusing to admit that they lost Kaurava. The only real defeat is people pretending you never won. BUT DEN WE GETS TA KRUMP DOSE BUTT'URT GITS AN HAV A REEL GUD FIGHT! WATZ DA PROBLEM WIF DAT?
- The Beast
- The War of The Beast
- Ghazghkull Mag Uruk Thraka
- Warboss Gorgutz 'Ead 'Unter
- "Da Tragedy of Hamlet, boss of Denmark" by Shake-da-boss-pole
- Not a fan of the original six Klans? Make your own instead!
- Tactics on how to play them.
- Dreadnought List
- Codex Orks: Space Odin Edition
- Ork Gunz
- Deff Skwadron
- Da Chopshop
- Ork Trek
- Ironjawz for one of their Age of Sigmar counterparts.
- Da Ork Song
- Dem Ork Boyz Song
- Armageddon Ork Hunters
- Ork Warboss Creation Tables
- Ork Klan Creation Tables
|Clans ov da Orks|
|Clans:||Bad Moons - Blood Axes - Deathskulls - Goffs - Evil Sunz - Snake Bites|
|Non-Clan Factions:||Freebooterz - Feral Orks - Speed Freeks - Dred Mob - Gretchin Revolutionary Committee - Beast Snaggas|
|Ork Gitz and Bosses|
|From da canon:||The Beast - Boss Snikrot - Boss Zagstruk - Ghazghkull Mag Uruk Thraka |
Grukk Face-Rippa - Mad Dok Grotsnik - Makari - Mek Boss Buzgob
Mozgrod Skragbad - Nazdreg Ug Urdgrub - Old Zogwort - Orkimedes
Tuska Daemon-Killa - Wazdakka Gutsmek - Zhadsnark da Rippa - Zodgrod Wortsnagga
Kaptin Badrukk - Herman von Strab - Ufthak Blackhawk
|From da gamez:||Brikkfist - Gorgutz 'Ead 'Unter - Kaptin Bluddflagg - Grimskull |
Mister Nailbrain - Orkamungus - Spookums - Stupid
|Playable Factions in Warhammer 40,000|
|Imperium:||AdMech:||Adeptus Mechanicus - Mechanicus Knights|
|Army:||Imperial Guard - Imperial Knights - Imperial Navy - Militarum Tempestus - Space Marines|
|Inquisition:||Inquisition - Sisters of Battle - Deathwatch - Grey Knights|
|Other:||Adeptus Custodes - Adeptus Ministorum - Death Cults - Officio Assassinorum - Sisters of Silence|
|Chaos:||Chaos Daemons - Chaos Space Marines - Lost and the Damned - Chaos Knights|
|Xenos:||Aeldari:||Dark Eldar - Eldar - Eldar Corsairs - Harlequins - Ynnari|
|Tyranids:||Genestealer Cults - Tyranids|
|Others:||Necrons - Orks - Tau - Leagues of Votann|
- Son of High King Valorik Canorem, High Prince of House Canorem, Master of the Blade of Gaia, Keeper of the Gates of Loralo, Wielder of the Kaloric Flame, Bringer of Hope, Herald of the Holy Order of the Adamantine Lance, The Paladin of Koto, Slayer of the Lion of Essa, The Triumphant! The Light of Stars! The Eradicator!