Quest:Ogre Civilization Quest

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This is a Quest featuring ogres forming a civilization. It is notable for its roll system which almost always allows for success of some sort, for the batshit insane nature of usual happenings in the canon, and for its terribly sporadic update schedule. Elapsed threads are archived at [1] and updates about future threads are posted at [2] Also Boss Bawss has suplexed the source of all rail roading.

Spoiler.gifThis article contains spoilers! You have been warned.


Ogir Place[edit]

The home of the Ogres, a giant flying oasis, now turned into a war golem. Possibly dead as of the latest thread.

Upgrades: Floating, Limbs, Sandstorm Drill, Magma Shield, Steering Wheel
Population: 153/153 ogres (6 dead), 84/84 elves, ∞/∞ patchwings, 50/50 Solar Skellies


  • [Landmarks] Oasis, Daphnaia, Underground Cave/Quarry [50% mined]
  • [Food] Cacti(-ow), Fungi, Wheat, Potatoes, Ravager Meat, Milk; Fair Growth (+32/turn)
  • [Resources] Hellfire Energy [Captive Archdemon Lord], Sandstone, Iron+Chromite Ores, Featherstone, Aquifer Pebbles
  • [Diplomacy] Scaratone [ALLIED; Featherstone Carts, Fungi, Paper]; Felpowder Elves [UNITED]; Achievement Hunter Dwarves [???]

  • [Key Items] Tomes (Dragon Lore, Illusory Magic I, Necromancy I), Crazy Ghost's Books
  • [Arms] Cactus Maces, Iron Scimitars, Heat-Seeking Rokkit Launchers, Short-Ranged Bow+Arrow, Crude Iron Armor, Demon Helm/Shoulderpads; Ur-Camouflage
  • [Vocations] OGRES: Geo (∞), Berserks (4), BMasters (1), Rockkits (0), Riders (0), Heallusionist (0)
  • [Beasts] Giant Bats (trained), Naked Mole Ravagers (trained)
  • [Settlement] Reinforced Rock Shanties, Storehouse, Mushroom Farms, Pier, Anchor/Staircase, THE FLAMES OF HELL

  • [NPCs] Boss Bawss Fistboss [+30 Diplomacy], Geomancer Gubbins [+30 Geomancy, +WE ALL GEOMANCERS NOW, +Ruoumoko], Beastkrumpa Squiggles Irwin [+Beast Whisperer, Big Vulture], Celicia Silverstone [???], Vultan [???]
  • [Tech] Fire, Fish, Agriculture[+Protection], Cooking, Tea, Mine, Smelt/Forge, Write/Read, Hats, FStone Flight, FStone Airdrops, Airships, Ur-Cartography
  • [Magic] Geomancy X, Healing I, Illusion I, Necromancy I, Time I, Climate Control 0
  • [Economy] System=Barter; Currency=Shit
  • [Justice] Krumpin' Duels / Boss Knows Best

ROLLS[edit]

The dice aren't based just on high/low, but also on crazy happenstance, including doubles which aren't so much "crazy" as "vaguely uncommon". The full result table is as follows:

  • Any Doubles: STUPID LUCKY
  • 100: SO BRILLIANT IT'S STUPID
  • 90-98: Stupidly Successful
  • 60-90: Successful
  • 40-60: Adequate
  • 10-40: Not So Good
  • 2-10: SO STUPID THAT IT'S BRILLIANT
  • 1: LUCKY STUPID