Stormtalon

From 1d4chan
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This article is about something that is considered by the overpowering majority of /tg/ to be fail.
Expect huge amounts of derp and rage, punctuated by /tg/ extracting humor from it.
The flying potato in all its glory
What everyone with two brain cells to rub together thinks it looks like

The Stormtalon gunship is a light attack aircraft used by the Space Marines. Armed with a twin-linked assault cannon and your choice of sponsons (either Skyhammer Missile Launchers or Typhoon Missile Launchers). It's also about as aerodynamic as a toaster, yet still the fastest light aircraft in the Imperium. Honestly, you would think the Guardsmen's flyers, resembling actual aircraft, would go faster than a god-damn guppy-potato metal box with turbocharged jet engines. Guess the engines are just that powerful. Which brings up the question of why larger versions of those engines aren't mounted on Navy atmospheric craft. Not to mention why they don't replace the giant dead weight rocket on their fighters with the type of engine used on Thunderhawks or better yet, Marauders. Crunchwise, its the faster, weaker, less resilient little brother of the Stormraven. You thought that was the Land Speeder, didn't you?

In all seriousness, though, laughing at it won’t stop it from mowing you down with lots of dakka.

Overview[edit]

The thing is little more than an armored compartment with two engines strapped to the sides and a massive gun hanging underneath. Like a Sentinel with a jet pack. The vehicle is meant for lightning-fast anti-infantry support fire, a niche already filled by a number of other Imperial vehicles, most of whom are a lot sturdier than the Stormtalon. GW noticed this little oversight, so in order to force you to buy it anyway they made it a flyer in 6th edition. If you've played Command and Conquer you might notice a certain resemblance to GDI's Orca gunship (as well as being about as fragile to boot). Obviously purely coincidental, after all, ripping off other franchises is bad. (Also, it looks kind of like the Iron Eagle Gyrocopter.)

No evidence is yet possessed on how pissed off the Imperial Navy are that the Space Marines now have their own dogfighter, which was meant to be solely the Navy's domain.

There have been several doomed valiant questionable efforts by modelers to convert the Stormtalon into something that doesn't look completely ridiculous, but their success on the matter is debatable (just remove the jets and add proper rotors, the hull's already taken from an attack helicopter.)

The new Stormhawk Interceptor, which appears to be a variant of the Stormtalon design, also looks for all the world like it's ripping off the Stormtalon conversions people have been making. Just look at it!

Gallery[edit]

Conversions[edit]

Vehicles of the Imperium of Man
Walkers Contemptor-Galatus Dreadnought - Contemptor-Incaendius Dreadnought - Death Company Dreadnought
Deathwatch Dreadnought - Dreadnought - Nemesis Dreadknight - Doomglaive Dreadnought - Furioso Dreadnought
Ironstrider Ballistarius - Invictor Tactical Warsuit - Librarian Dreadnought - Mortifier - Mortis Dreadnought
Onager Dunecrawler - Penitent Engine - Redemptor Dreadnought - Sentinel - Space Wolves Venerable Dreadnought
Sydonian Dragoon - Telemon Heavy Dreadnought - Wulfen Dreadnought - Paragon Warsuit
Transports Aurox - Chimera - Coronus Grav Carrier - Crassus Armored Assault Transport - Goliath Truck
Gorgon Armored Assault Transport - Hades Breaching Drill - Immolator - Impulsor - Macro-Hauler
Pegasus AAV - Razorback Transport - Repressor - Rhino - Road-Wheeler - Taurox - Testudo
Titan Train - Trojan Support Vehicle - Triaros Armoured Conveyer - Tunneling Transport Vehicles
Light
Vehicles
Atlas Recovery Tank - Achilles Ridgerunner - Bane Wolf - Bike Squad - Centaur Utility Vehicle
Cyclops Demolition Vehicle - Devil Dog - Galvanic Servohauler - Hellhound - Invader ATV - Land Crawler
Pegasus AFV - Salamander Reconnaissance Tank - Scylla Light Tank - Siegfried - Squat Bike - Squat Trike
Tauros - Tectonic Fragdrill - Venator - Wolfquad
Battle
Tanks
Castigator Tank - Caladius Grav-Tank - Gladiator Tank - Krios Battle Tank - Land Raider
Leman Russ Battle Tank - Predator - Ragnarok - Repulsor Tank - Sabre Tank Hunter
Sicaran Battle Tank - Spartan Assault Tank - Vindicator
Ordnance Basilisk Artillery Gun - Colossus Bombard - Deathstrike Missile Launcher
Exorcist - Goliath Mega-Cannon - Griffon Heavy Mortar Carrier - Hunter - Hydra Flak Tank
Land Train - Legion Arquitor Bombard - Manticore Launcher Tank - Medusa Siege Gun
Rapier Armoured Carrier - Stalker - Thunderfire Cannon - Whirlwind - Wyvern Suppression Tank
Superheavy
Tanks
Astraeus - Baneblade - Capitol Imperialis - Cerberus Heavy Tank Destroyer - Colossus War Machine
Cyclops War Machine - Fellblade - Leviathan - Macharius Heavy Tank - Macrocarid Explorator
Malcador Heavy Tank - Mastodon - Ordinatus - Typhon Heavy Siege Tank
Skimmers Dawneagle Jetbike - Gyrfalcon Pattern Jetbike - Imperial Jetbike - Javelin Attack Speeder
Grav-Cutter - Grav-Rhino - Kharon - Land Speeder - Land Speeder Vengeance
Pulpit of Saint Holline's Basilica - Skorpius Hover Tank - Stormrider - Storm Speeder
Pallas Grav-Attack
Flyers Archaeocopter - Ares Gunship - Caestus Assault Ram - Container Transporter - Corvus Blackstar
Fire Raptor - Iron Eagle Gyrocopter - Nephilim Jetfighter - Orgus Flyer - Orion Gunship - Overlord Gunship
Overlord Armoured Airship - Sky Talon - Space Marine Landing Craft - Storm Eagle - Stormbird
Stormhawk - Chiropteran - Stormraven - Stormtalon - Stormwolf - Thunderhawk - Valkyrie - Vendetta
Vulture
Fighters &
Bombers
Avenger Strike Fighter - Lightning Fighter - Marauder Bomber
Stormfang - Thunderbolt Fighter - Xiphon Interceptor
Spacecraft Aquila Lander - Arvus Lighter - Boarding Torpedo - Devourer Dropship - Drop Pod
Faustus Interceptor - Fury Interceptor - Gun-Cutter - Shark Assault Boat
Starhawk Bomber - Tetrarch Heavy Lander
Titans Imperial Knight - Warhound Scout Titan - Reaver Battle Titan - Warlord Battle Titan
Warbringer Nemesis Titan - Warmaster Heavy Battle Titan - Emperor Battle Titan
Forces of the Codex Compliant Astartes
Command: Apothecary - Brother-Captain - Brother-Sergeant - Chaplain - Chapter Master
Command Squad - Honour Guard - Librarian - Techmarine
Troops: Assault Squad - Centurion Squad - Chapter Serf - Devastator Squad
Scout Squad - Tactical Squad - Terminator Squad - Veteran Squad
Structures: Castellum Stronghold
Transports: Land Raider - Mastodon Heavy Assault Transport
Razorback Transport - Rhino Transport - Spartan Assault Tank - Termite
Vehicles: Bike Squad - Dreadnought - Javelin Attack Speeder - Jetbike - Land Speeder
Predator Tank - Sabre Tank Hunter - Sicaran Battle Tank - Vindicator
Ordnance: Hunter - Legion Arquitor Bombard - Rapier Armoured Carrier - Stalker
Thunderfire Cannon - Whirlwind
Flyers: Caestus Assault Ram - Fire Raptor - Orgus Flyer - Storm Eagle - Stormbird
Stormhawk - Stormraven - Stormtalon - Thunderhawk - Xiphon Interceptor
Superheavy Tanks: Cerberus Heavy Tank Destroyer - Fellblade Super-Heavy Tank
Typhon Heavy Siege Tank
Spacecraft: Boarding Torpedo - Drop Pod - Space Marine Landing Craft
Allied Space Marines: Fallen Angel - Primaris Marine - Blood Angels - Dark Angels
Deathwatch - Grey Knights - Space Wolves
Forces of the Blood Angels
Command: Apothecary - Brother-Captain - Brother-Sergeant - Chaplain
Chapter Master - Librarian - Sanguinary Priest - Techmarine
Troops: Assault Squad - Devastator Squad - Sanguinary Guard - Scout Squad
Tactical Squad - Terminator Squad - Veteran Squad
Death Company: Death Company - Death Company Chaplain - Death Company Terminator
Walkers: Contemptor-Furioso Dreadnought - Contemptor-Incaendius Dreadnought
Death Company Dreadnought - Dreadnought - Furioso Dreadnought
Librarian Dreadnought
Transports: Razorback - Rhino
Vehicles: Baal Predator - Land Raider (Land Raider Crusader - Land Raider Phobos
Land Raider Redeemer - Land Raider Angel Infernus
)
Predator Tank - Vindicator - Hunter - Stalker - Whirlwind
Flyers: Stormhawk - Stormraven - Stormtalon - Storm Eagle - Thunderhawk
Spacecraft: Boarding Torpedo - Drop Pod - Space Marine Landing Craft
Allies: Space Marines - Primaris Marines
Forces of the Grey Knights
Command: Brotherhood Champion - Grand Master - Librarian
Techmarine - Chaplain - Apothecary
Troops: Grey Knight Paladin - Interceptor Squad - Justicar
Purgation Squad - Purifier - Strike Squad - Terminator Squad
Walkers: Dreadknight - Doomglaive Dreadnought - Venerable Dreadnought
Vehicles: Land Raider (Land Raider Crusader - Land Raider Vortimer)
Rhino - Razorback
Flyers: Stormraven - Stormtalon - Stormhawk - Thunderhawk
Spacecraft: Aquila Lander - Boarding Torpedo
Drop Pod - Space Marine Landing Craft
Allies: Inquisition - Sisters of Battle
Forces of the Fallen
Command: Cypher - Fallen Champion
Troops: Fallen
Flyers: Stormtalon - Thunderhawk
Spacecraft: Drop Pod
Allies: Chaos Space Marines
Space Marines (Dark Angels Exempted)