Weirdboy Tower

From 1d4chan
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This article is about something that is considered by the overpowering majority of /tg/ to be fail.
Expect huge amounts of derp and rage, punctuated by /tg/ extracting humor from it.
Oh god....the Fail.

Oh boy, you thought the Spleenrippa looked impractical? You thought the infamous dick gun of a Gargant was goofy? You thought that the Wardien Dreadknight and the Khornate Lord of Skulls was idiotic? You thought that half of the Daemon Engines from Khorne and Slaanesh was mindnumbingly retarded? You thought the Imperial Taurox was stupidly high? Well buckle up because you are going to be in one hell of a ride. Ladies and gentlemen meet the Weirdboy Tower.

Now it is understandable that Weirdboyz are nervous around the battlefield, what with their chances of accidentally using too much WAAAGH energy which will make their heads and that of any Orks near them to spontaneously explode. So what is the best way to boost up their confidence? Lets make a vehicle dedicated to them of course!

Weirdboy Towers are engines of war used by the Orks. Manned by Weirdboyz, they apparently amplify the Psyker's psychic powers and create havoc across the battlefield.

The reason why this is mocked is because it looks stupid. It is too damned tall and a slight breeze in the wind should be enough to topple it over. It also looks like a moving dick with herpes...maybe Slaanesh was involved? And that is without going into the fact that it lacks barely any secondary weapons to defend itself. Its only gimmick is making the Weirboy powers super powered, but it doesn't really guarantee it will prevent an explosive 'eadbanging and it is a massive target.

The only good news is that it has been almost forgotten by GeeDubs for decades now. Nope, in Saga of the Beast is mentioned.

Fanmade Rules[edit]

8th Edition[edit]

Name M WS BS S T W A Ld Sv Points
Weirdboy Tower 8" 3+ 5+ 6 6 15 4 6 4+ 200
Weapon Range Type S AP D Abilities Points
Big Shoota 36" Assault 3 5 0 1 - 0
Bolted On Big Shoota 36" Assault 3 5 0 1 - 2
Rokkit Launcha 36" Heavy D3 8 -2 D3 - 5
Burna 8" Assault D6 4 0 1 This weapon automatically hits its target. 2
Ramshackle Tyres Melee Melee User -1 1 - 0

Abilities:

  • Random Psychic discharges:
    • Roll a D6 for each unit (including this model) within 2D6” at the start of each of your turns, on 6 you must attempt to cast smite at that unit in your next psychic phase. This spell does not count towards the total number of spells this model may cast this turn and does not incure a +1 to the casting cost for subsequent smite attempts and this model only suffers perils in the warp on double 6’s instead of doubles in general.
  • Ork Psychic Shield: Copper wiring around the tower absorbs excess wargh energy produced by the weirdboy’s inside it, they by preventing the tower from going boom when an orl sneezes and creating a (if very unpredictable) force field which is surprisingly effective at negating enemy attacks.
    • At the beginning of your turn roll a D6 and add 1 to that value, the resulting value is this models invulnerability save until the start of your next turn (eg. You roll a 4, so your invulnerability save will be 5++).

This vehicle may transport up to 10 ORK INFANTRY models. Each MEGA ARMOUR or JUMP PACK model takes up the space of two models.

Faction Keywords: ORK, <CLAN>

Keywords: VEHICLE, TRANSPORT, WEIRDBOY TOWER,

Forces ov da Orks
Bosses: Beastboss - Big Mek - Boiler Boy - Meganobz - Painboy
Painboss - Pigdok - Warboss - Warlord - Weirdboy - Wurrboy
Boyz: Boyz (Huntas - Madboyz - Shoota Boyz - Slugga Boyz
Stikk Bommas - Wildboyz
) - 'Ardboyz - Brutes
Gretchin - Nobz - Skarboyz - Cyborks - Diggas
Oddboys: Burna Boyz - Flash Gitz - Kommandos - Lootas
Mekboyz - Rokkas - Runtherd - Stormboyz - Tankbustas
Stompy 'fings: Deff Dred - Gorkanaut - Killa Kan - Mega-Dread - Morkanaut
Transports an' Tanks: Battlewagon - Big Trakks - Bonebreaka - Bonecruncha
Braincrusha - Flakkatrakks - Gobsmasha - Grot Tanks
Gutrippa - Grot MegaTank - Gunwagon - Looted Wagon
Lungbursta - Trukk - Spleenrippa - Weirdboy Tower
Big Lugga - Grot Trakbike
Feral Orks an'
Beast Snaggas:
Beast Snagga Boy - Boarboyz - Kill Rig - Squiggoth
Squighog Boy - Trappa - Herda - Squig Catapult
Speed Freeks: Boomdakka Snazzwagon - Bowelburna
Deffkilla Wartrike - Junka - Kustom Boosta-Blasta - Wartrakk
Megatrakk Scrapjet - Rukkatrukk Squigbuggy - Cuttas
Shokkjump Dragsta - Speedsta - Warbikers - Warbuggy
Flyboyz: Deffkoptas - Bomma - Dakkajet - Fighta - Fighta-Bomma - Drilla-Killa
Grot Bomms - Landa - Minelayer - Warkoptas - Wazbom Blastajet
Supportin' Dakka: Grot Bomm Launcha - Magna-Kannon - Mek Gunz
Splashy Noggins: Ork Submersible - Nautical Kroozer
Zoggin' Big and Ded Killy: Battlefortress - Gargant - Kill Tanks - Stompa
Locomotive Battering Ram
Warp Ulks: Ork Assault Boat - Rok
Huts'an Stuff: Mekboy Workshop - Dropz
Gubbinz an' Wots-its: Choppas - Fungus - Ork Gunz - Snotlings - Squigs - Warboars